Coral Evan Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 Two years ago I was travelling transatlantically for work and a beautiful girl in her 20s dar next to me. This girl was dressed to the nines, designer everything and seemed very innocent. We started chatting and she told me she was from E. Europe like me but not a US citizen and that she had come to meet a Middle Eastern man in LA who turned out to have seriously oppressive ideas about women and wanted to marry her. He had bought her all that fancy stuff. She was going home because she realized she could not marry him and stay in this relationship. We kept in touch and lo and behold I see on social media that she went to Hawaii and got married to an Ameircan fellow suddenly and had a baby. She invited me to the wedding as she knows nobody in the US but I was working in Europe still. Now that I came back she came, 2 month old in tow to LA and basically told me when we met for lunch that her life with the new man in Hawaii is terrible, he ignores her and the baby, tells her he has no interest in the family, wallows in depression and won’t work as he has money from his family. She is desperate, alone and is staying with a girl whose husband is tired of hearing the baby cry. This girl has no green card and is alone in LA with only her baby and her husband gives her money to do what she wants. She is now saying she needs somewhere to stay and I feel bad not inviting her to my home. The thing is I don’t really know her too well but she seems nice and honest and my heart breaks to see someone alone with a small baby in a foreign country. She tells me her husband denies there is a problem and hangs up on her when she calls saying she is nuts with post-partum depression. I can’t gauge if she is a victim or what I can do to help her. She really seems genuine. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 she had come to meet a Middle Eastern man in LA who turned out to have seriously oppressive ideas about women and wanted to marry her. I see on social media that she went to Hawaii and got married to an American fellow suddenly and had a baby. I'm afraid both of these instances would lead me to question both her motives and judgment. So, help her interface with Social Services? Sure... Invite her into my home? No way... Mr. Lucky 5 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 She sounds like bad news. Seems like her only goal in life is to a have a man take of her. She left Europe to possibly marry a middle eastern man in the states and that didn't work out so she went home. Next thing you know she's left home again to get married to another man in the states. What's up with that? Sounds like she just wanted to come to America and these men were supposed to be her free ride. I say help her find resources but don't let her stay in your house. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Malin889 Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 She may be a scam artist, be careful. Or maybe I’ve just seen too many movies. Tell her to reach out to her family. If she is for real, then again, ask her to reach out to her family. She must’ve originated from somewhere. How’s she make it to LA from Hawaii? She obviously has resources of some kind. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Coral Evan Posted June 23, 2018 Author Share Posted June 23, 2018 Well a few things do give me pause. One, when I first met her it was in the context of drama with ANOTHER man she needed advice about. Two, when she got here with her current husband already married and pregnant the border authorities also said “another man?” Furthermore she comes from Prague where she had a nice apartment and a good job at an American comapany (she says) and she mentions running away from Pargue to her first US guy because “something bad happened”. Also she has no pictures of family in Slovakia and other stuff like most girls in E Europe, just of having fun in Dubai and Pargue and the US. She seems wide-eyed and very innocent and may be just dazzled about the “American Dream” that frankly, from being born here, I know is NOT what Hollywood portrays though most Europeans think we live in the movies. On the other hand in native country Romania I know TONS of attractive and smart young women just like her who work like crazy to become engineers and doctors and work at international companies and are VERY reticent about marrying an American or Western man they really don’t know. This girl on the other hand came here 2 times (not sure how she got the tourist Visa the first time) with barely any luggage for 2 men. She does say “what was I thinking?” But I am STILL on the fence and feel guilty about not inviting her esp when I see the 8 week old crying. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 She's a golddigger who's bailing as soon as she finds out there's not enough gold . She now has a baby with a man so if she wants to leave, he will be giving her money for child support. Don't be a sucker. This woman is trouble. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 But I am STILL on the fence and feel guilty about not inviting her esp when I see the 8 week old crying. Coral Evan, nothing wrong with having a big heart as long as you keep your eyes open. You can offer help, just be smart about it and understand all may not be as it seems. I'd guess it'd be interesting to hear the other side of the story from the two gents she's been involved with. She sounds like a serial damsel in distress... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Author Coral Evan Posted June 24, 2018 Author Share Posted June 24, 2018 It's also odd to me when I mention her family back home and what do they say, she goes silent or tells me vague stuff. She says she wants to go with the baby, but has to wait for th Green Card. Thing is why leave a good job in good city for a man you barely know. She does say what was she thinking but yeah each time I met her it was in the context of more drama with a man. Just will keep a distance. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 this is not a good long-term plan you might even get done for child support, depending on where you live Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 You can offer to take her to apply for her green card but do not be alone with her EVER. Link to post Share on other sites
Malin889 Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) It's also odd to me when I mention her family back home and what do they say, she goes silent or tells me vague stuff. She says she wants to go with the baby, but has to wait for th Green Card. Thing is why leave a good job in good city for a man you barely know. She does say what was she thinking but yeah each time I met her it was in the context of more drama with a man. Just will keep a distance. She wasn’t thinking? I wasn’t thinking when I run a stop sign or dye my hair a bad color; I DON’T leave my country for a man I don’t know. She knew exactly what she was doing. Feel bad for the baby, sure, stayed she has a crazy mother. But don’t feel bad for her. Edited June 24, 2018 by Malin889 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Coral Evan Posted June 24, 2018 Author Share Posted June 24, 2018 @D0nnivan: why not be alone with her? I mean I lay sound naive but not understanding Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 @D0nnivan: why not be alone with her? I mean I lay sound naive but not understanding I think we’re all wondering what she might be capable of, she’s made some pretty bizarre moves to this point. So she might allege abuse or assault for financial gain... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Author Coral Evan Posted June 25, 2018 Author Share Posted June 25, 2018 Yes thank you all for your advice. For now she is going back home to her husband and called to say bye to me and wish me luck tomorrow at a big presentation, so phewwwww. I think you all gave great advice and I will definitely keep all in mind. Thanks :-) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Carpe Diem Posted July 3, 2018 Share Posted July 3, 2018 EVERY SINGLE poster has given you the same advice. Danger!Danger! This woman is not”innocent” You are only getting partial truths and possibly full-on lies The plot is an international, multi-person, high stakes (marriage, money, citizenship, children), years long play filled with constant drama. You KNOW all of this. Do not in any way, shape or form get drawn into it. If you do, you truly have no one to blame but yourself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Pratiksha Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 Happy birthday wishes Learn on how you have the Best Happy Birthday Wishes for someone who is close to you. Link to post Share on other sites
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