JustGettingBy Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 So the woman from this thread https://www.loveshack.org/forums/transitioning/search/658514-am-i-making-mountain-out-molehill-did-i-screw-up is barely responding and goes cold whenever I try and set a time, despite continually saying she's interested. This is NOT an isolated incident, and seems to be the norm for me. It seems as if I'm able to get a lot of women to agree to a date such as lunch together, but there's always a cancellation before hand, or me getting stood up. Idk what I'm doing wrong. Here's my basic situation in point form for simplicity: --As stated, I've received "yes" responses to dates, and also while at work or out for runs I've noticed women giving me the odd "look" or "checking me out" so I'm not deathly unattractive, or that I have no chemistry with women --I'm able to retain multiple close friendships for well over a decade each, so its not a total lack of social skills --Although my job is mediocre ( but still 40 hours a week) and I live at home, I've noticed guys I know in a worse situation have at least some success with women (a guy I know my age is unemployed while living at home and has a worthwhile gf), so its not that I can't live up to expectations, and its not women being too shallow (I have a feeling my job situation will get better very soon, but that's another thread altogether) Any ideas what my problem is? Link to post Share on other sites
fredflint Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 She's just not that interested. Her actions speak louder than her words. Move on to the next prospect. And yes, this happens a lot in dating, it's not just you. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 23, 2018 Share Posted June 23, 2018 Depending on your age, living at home is a big turnoff to a lot of women. Bad jobs, it's a mixed bag, depending what type woman you are going after. If they have a lot of assets, they'll normally want to date an equal or better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustGettingBy Posted June 24, 2018 Author Share Posted June 24, 2018 She's just not that interested. Her actions speak louder than her words. Move on to the next prospect. And yes, this happens a lot in dating, it's not just you. Happening twice, three times maybe would make me think its just bad luck. A dozen in a row without a single success makes me think its me. Depending on your age, living at home is a big turnoff to a lot of women. Bad jobs, it's a mixed bag, depending what type woman you are going after. If they have a lot of assets, they'll normally want to date an equal or better. I have "assets" in the bank, growing rapidly. I'd rather live at home for a couple extra years and immediately buy and only take a tiny mortgage rather than rent for decade after decade. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 I have "assets" in the bank, growing rapidly. I'd rather live at home for a couple extra years and immediately buy and only take a tiny mortgage rather than rent for decade after decade. That is your choice but like any choice it has consequences. One of them is that most people will assume that you are unable to cut the apron strings, which is a huge turn off & non starter to many. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted June 24, 2018 Share Posted June 24, 2018 (edited) Happening twice, three times maybe would make me think its just bad luck. A dozen in a row without a single success makes me think its me. I have "assets" in the bank, growing rapidly. I'd rather live at home for a couple extra years and immediately buy and only take a tiny mortgage rather than rent for decade after decade. Good, but I meant assets a little more broadly, as in if you have looks, personality, style, money, etc., and I meant that as in if the woman has these things going for her, she'll want similar in return, not just money. If you get a woman who likes any old guy as long as they have money, that's not a quality woman. I don't know if you've ever lived away from home supporting yourself or not, but if not, there are ways you are neither mature nor have become your own person fully that it's hard to explain. A normal part of growing up is leaving the nest, and refusing to be dictated to by your parents anymore. As long as you are living in the comfort of their home under their rules and mom is doing everything for you, and being influenced by them, you have not yet become a self-sustaining man, and women understand this. Everyone needs a couple of years of being on their own to really become their own man or woman, free of influences, and learning to care for themselves. A woman can't see what you'd be like until you've done this. She doesn't know if you even know how to do housework and will help out 50/50. She doesn't know if you can make a decision without first consulting your parents and getting their approval. She doesn't know if your mom gets jealous of her and starts making live miserable, she doesn't know if you'll stand up to her and tell her to back off if things get serious -- which you can't even do if you're living with mom still. I get wanting to save money and again, I don't know how old you are. I mean, if you're still say 22 or under, I have no problem with it, but some women will, and the older you are, the more problem they'll have with it. Edited June 24, 2018 by preraph Link to post Share on other sites
Chris2016 Posted June 25, 2018 Share Posted June 25, 2018 (edited) If you're good looking and still live at home ... oh he is so resourceful and financially responsible. If you're not good looking and still live at home ... loser. Resolution: Find the uggo's that thinks you're a hottie. Plus: How do they know that you still live at home? You can lie to the heavens; make up and get your stories straight; and they won't know sh*t. -Just like you wouldn't know if they were a slut, if they didn't tell you. Point being, I think it just comes down to looks. Edited June 25, 2018 by Chris2016 Link to post Share on other sites
Author JustGettingBy Posted June 25, 2018 Author Share Posted June 25, 2018 If you're good looking and still live at home ... oh he is so resourceful and financially responsible. If you're not good looking and still live at home ... loser. Resolution: Find the uggo's that thinks you're a hottie. Plus: How do they know that you still live at home? You can lie to the heavens; make up and get your stories straight; and they won't know sh*t. -Just like you wouldn't know if they were a slut, if they didn't tell you. Point being, I think it just comes down to looks. They don't know. I've never mentioned my living situation. I can get women to agree to dates both using OLD and organically, so its not looks, but they always either cancel or stand me up. Link to post Share on other sites
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