how do i get her back

[TPercival]

ok well me and my girlfriend of 2 years just broke up 2 weeks ago. we still talk and are trying to be friends and we argue like we did in our relationship over the lttle things. i have always hated argueing and it tears me up inside and i was always kinda nervous to tell her how i felt toward in bacause in my head it never sounded right so since we broke up i have confessed my love to her like i have always tried to and now she tell me its took us to break up for you to tell me what i wanted to hear from you. i dont know how to respond to that we had a great relationship we were eachothers first sex partner and first love and me and her argueing alot tore her away from me and she is interested in this new guy but she says she isnt ready for a relationship but yet there holding hands and just kissed today and i found out and it tears me up inside cause she tell me she still cares and still love me she just need time and space but i cant help being the jealouse ex and i want to be here bestfriend and be there when she needs me so can n e one help

[LucreziaBorgia]

Right now, the last thing either of you need is to fake 'friends' - you'll only be doing it because you want her back, and she'll only be doing it because she feels sorry for you and guilty for dumping you for some other guy.

 

Right now, there is nothing you can do to get her back. She has run to this new guy in reaction to the negative things in your relationship in the form of a rebound. Because it was a matter of escaping negative things, she has no doubt highly idealized this guy and has mapped a lot of wishful thinking and high hopes on him. There is no way she is going to walk away from this 'dream guy' and go back into the relationship that she has managed to break herself away from.

 

Your only hope of reconciliation is to offer her a completly new relationship in the form of a 'starting over' second chance. If all you have to offer is the relationship she left in the first place then there is no way she is going to come back. The key here is that she has to want a second chance with you. As long as she is seeing this other guy, though - there is no point even considering it.

 

You'll need to make your break. Tell her that 'friends' isn't what you want and that your heart can't handle it and then cut her off cold. Don't contact her, and don't let her contact you. Use the time to get your head and heart straight and more clear so that you can begin to get over her.

 

If a second chance is what you want, it is absolutely necessary to do this - you have to let the 'first chance' end completely, heal from it, learn from it and then once you are over it - you can begin to start thinking about a second chance. You may even be lucky enough to heal enough to realize you don't want a second chance with her and will be ready to move on with someone new who can give you the happiness that you are looking for in a relationship.