bradt93 Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 As you all know I'm a loner and I look at all my friends facebook pages and they are doing fun things like I'm gonig to the beach and just plain having fun while I'm stuck here at home in my bedroom most of the time. I can't bring myself to socialize with people, because I'm afraid I will get rejected even by male friends. I made a stupid error back in middle school 17 years ago and I still feel ostracized or maybe it's in my head. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 But you can still go to the beach and enjoy the waves and water and go do things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bradt93 Posted July 5, 2018 Author Share Posted July 5, 2018 But you can still go to the beach and enjoy the waves and water and go do things. Oh by myself, how fun. Something is wrong with me and I don't know what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 I made a stupid error back in middle school 17 years ago and I still feel ostracized or maybe it's in my head. You'd have to more specific about why an incident that long ago would have such an effect on you today. My guess would be, you're thinking about something people have long forgotten... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 (edited) Oh by myself, how fun. Something is wrong with me and I don't know what it is. I've gone on all kinds of adventures and trips by myself. I always take a camera, though. I'm not much of a beach person, but camping, hiking, traveling, seeing new & different natural wonders, that's my thing. The only thing keeping you from going to the beach and enjoying yourself, is you. Who cares what happened 17 years ago, that's ancient history. There is nothing wrong with you, just face your fear or inconvenience or whatever it is and plan a trip to the beach. Go have fun, don't let the summer pass you by!! Oh and don't forget to take a good book with you!! Edited July 5, 2018 by Happy Lemming spacing Link to post Share on other sites
Poutrew Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 As you all know I'm a loner and I look at all my friends facebook pages and they are doing fun things like I'm gonig to the beach and just plain having fun while I'm stuck here at home in my bedroom most of the time. I can't bring myself to socialize with people, because I'm afraid I will get rejected even by male friends. I made a stupid error back in middle school 17 years ago and I still feel ostracized or maybe it's in my head. Well, you can comfort yourself with the thought that all those friends are eventually going to wind up with skin cancer while you will be old and healthy... Otherwise, you can go to the beach alone and have some fun in the waves yourself...and who the hell knows, you may wind up rescuing a Brazilian underwear model from getting dragged out to sea by a rip current and she will glue herself to you out of gratitude... stranger things have happened... Link to post Share on other sites
Author bradt93 Posted July 5, 2018 Author Share Posted July 5, 2018 Well, you can comfort yourself with the thought that all those friends are eventually going to wind up with skin cancer while you will be old and healthy... Otherwise, you can go to the beach alone and have some fun in the waves yourself...and who the hell knows, you may wind up rescuing a Brazilian underwear model from getting dragged out to sea by a rip current and she will glue herself to you out of gratitude... stranger things have happened... Yea me being an old man, that will really happen unless she is a gold digger lol. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted July 5, 2018 Share Posted July 5, 2018 Yea me being an old man... Until you have your AARP card, you are NOT old!! And even then, you can still play like a young guy!! That being said, how far away is that beach?? Can you make it a day trip?? Or would you have to stay overnight at a motel/hotel?? I want to hear you making plans to go and enjoy the waves!! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author bradt93 Posted July 6, 2018 Author Share Posted July 6, 2018 You know my high school friends are on facebook, but they have their own families now and I don't have my own family yet, they are really busy. What are your suggestions that I do to make friends when I go back to college this Fall? Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted July 6, 2018 Share Posted July 6, 2018 You know my high school friends are on facebook, but they have their own families now and I don't have my own family yet, they are really busy. What are your suggestions that I do to make friends when I go back to college this Fall? I was having problems in one of my courses and joined a study group. I made friends with others in the study group. This was quite some years ago, do they still have study groups?? These study groups used to be posted on the big student bulletin board, do they still have bulletin boards?? I have a side question... Do you really need to be on Facebook?? It seems you are comparing yourself to others on Facebook, if it were me I'd stop going on the site and concentrate on things that didn't cause me angst. Just my two cents... Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyKatLady Posted July 6, 2018 Share Posted July 6, 2018 not everybody is going to like you in life. you just keep going, you know?! It is a bummer, but you probably don't want to be around people who don't like you or support you anyways...just saying. pray, or get involved in something you care about and just be you. That should be enough to make a small difference, then you just keep going until you notice bigger and bigger differences. But mainly, just be you. It's hard to keep yourself together once you let the outside world in, so it's ok to be nervous. But, you only live once, and if you are bored of your bedroom, head on out into society. Choose recreations and friends wisely, is my advice. Have fun, be safe and God bless! Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted July 6, 2018 Share Posted July 6, 2018 I spent a good deal of time thinking that certain people didn't like me. When I was around them I was polite but not very warm. I recently started talking more to one of the group that I thought didn't like me. She had become good friends with a different friend of mine. She informed me that the group thought I didn't like them because I was always quiet around them & I didn't talk much. I was quiet because I was shy, I didn't want to be rejected & to me I always felt like the outsider can't come barging into the group but rather the group had to open up to invite the new person, which in my case never happened. So I kept my distance. Since she told me they all thought I was the problem for not being more friendly, I have gone out of my way to say hello, smile & make small talk. It seems to be working. I feel much more accepted. I tell you all that because I want you to learn from my mistake. I know you fear being rejected but somebody has to make the 1st move. Everybody fears being rejected. So try smiling & saying hello to these people. You make a point to invite one of them to do something with you & slowly make your way into the group. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted July 6, 2018 Share Posted July 6, 2018 As you all know I'm a loner and I look at all my friends facebook pages and they are doing fun things like I'm gonig to the beach and just plain having fun while I'm stuck here at home in my bedroom most of the time. I can't bring myself to socialize with people, because I'm afraid I will get rejected even by male friends. I made a stupid error back in middle school 17 years ago and I still feel ostracized or maybe it's in my head. Stay off Facebook. It's a breeding ground for envy. Within the last week, I've found out about 3 couples with seemingly perfect marriages/families (if you believe Facebook) splitting up. (Well, 2 have split already and one is on the way to it). It makes me really sad for them, but it's also a sobering reminder to stop comparing yourself to others. You absolutely cannot believe everything you see on Facebook. Not even close. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
ElKay Posted July 10, 2018 Share Posted July 10, 2018 I felt super shy and uncomfortable going to the pool alone, but when a guy changed our plan to go swimming last minute (10 minutes before our meeting, asked if we could meet in an hour and a half?), I was forced to just enjoy the situation on my own... And you know what? It was actually fun after I got over the awkward moment of entering on my own. If you notice it, there are some people that go swimming alone! I spoke with some and talked with a family randomly in the water, haha. Just put yourself out there. It's very darn scary, but it works out more often than not to at least help you enjoy things on your own. Link to post Share on other sites
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