My ex girlfriend doesn’t know what she wants

[Itssteve12]

This might be long. Me and my ex girlfriend dated for a little over a year. We were extremely attached and it was healthy and loving. I truthfully wasn’t mature enough for a long term relationship and I ended up ending things at around our 1 year and it hurt her really bad. We barely talked for about 3 weeks but then I talked to her and we tried to work on things. For about 3 months we started talking again, hanging out but we’rent official. Once again she felt like I wasn’t doing the things I should’ve to make her feel wanted. I wasn’t being mean but I wasn’t doing a lot of the little things. Overall for the past 3 months she has been pushing me away on purpose. Her friends who have a big impact on her are telling her I’m a bad guy and sayin all these bad things about me which she has told me is making her scared and making her push me away. Her friends also recently introduced her to another guy who she is my serious with yet but is talking too. She’s told me every single day that she knows she should follow her true heart and feelings for me but she has people which are her friends telling her bad stuff about me. She still flirts with me, cares and loves me and even her mom is telling her how good I am. She’s never been able to trust guys that well and I was kinda like the first guy she ever truly loved. We haven’t gone a day without talking throughout this whole process and she has initiated 80% of the contact. I’ve treated her really good and been there for her especially in these past months. We talked last night and honestly she still loves me so much but she’s just so confused and has people confusing her. Today I started no contact cause she said she needs time away from me to figure her feelings out. Looking forward I believe we will get back together. She’s even told me these past days that she sees herself coming back to me and everything like that. What do you guys think ?

[Happy Lemming]

Do you really want to date a woman that can't make her own decisions and has to consult her girlfriends??

 

How many hoops do these girlfriends want you to jump through before they approve you worthy of dating or her taking you back??

 

I had one woman dump me because her girlfriends didn't like/approve of me. I asked her if her girlfriends were going to keep her warm at night?? I also told her that those supposed friends would all be gone in under 2 years. She contacted me 18 months later and told me I was right.

 

Plenty of women out there... NEXT!!

[Mr. Lucky]

This might be long. Me and my ex girlfriend dated for a little over a year. We were extremely attached and it was healthy and loving. I truthfully wasn’t mature enough for a long term relationship and I ended up ending things at around our 1 year and it hurt her really bad. We barely talked for about 3 weeks but then I talked to her and we tried to work on things. For about 3 months we started talking again, hanging out but we’rent official. Once again she felt like I wasn’t doing the things I should’ve to make her feel wanted.

 

It's entirely possible neither of you are ready for this type of relationship.

 

You might look at this as a learning experience rather than a problem to be solved...

 

Mr. Lucky

[Normm]

We were extremely attached and it was healthy and loving. I truthfully wasn’t mature enough for a long term relationship and I ended up ending things at around our 1 year

 

What does this even mean?

 

"I love and care about this girl and I'm extremely attached to her as she is to me, but I'm not mature enough to be with her so I ended it".

 

 

 

Just leave her alone. Things were apparently going quite well until you went nuclear for no good reason. If she wants back in deal with it then. You've done enough damage.

 

 

 

 

No wonder she's got mixed feelings.

[d0nnivain]

Once again she felt like I wasn’t doing the things I should’ve to make her feel wanted. I wasn’t being mean but I wasn’t doing a lot of the little things.

 

What exactly are you supposed to be doing to make her feel wanted? It sounds like you give & she takes & takes & takes. So what is she looking for? Does she want some sycophant who follows her around like a begging puppy dog constantly telling her how beautiful she is? Or is she expecting that you speak to her on a daily basis & spend time with her.

 

 

She seems awfully weak willed if she is so easily influenced by her friends. Life is not a romance novel.

 

 

Starting NC because she needs "time away from you" is the worst thing you can do. You know darn well that she's going straight to this other guy her friends are pushing on her. If you two want to fix your relationship, you need to talk & work together. If you don't want to do the work, together, you might as well break up. Letting her go off & play with this guy is a lousy idea which makes you look weak & pathetic. Do you really want to be her back up plan?