What's it like being in an open relationship

[dateme]

Share how you make it work. Is there jealousy? How many partners do you have?

[smackie9]

I'm not into it but I was told you needs two things: Trust and honest communication.

[dateme]

Hmmm. Makes sense.

[central]

It depends. The reason for doing so may have a huge impact on how you conduct it, and how it turns out. Are both into it, or is one going along, or is one okay with the other pursuing this but not interested for themselves? Is it to provide something you don't have, or for another reason? There are many variations, and circumstances and motivations will influence how you decide to organize things.

 

We've had an open relationship for 18 years, and it has worked for us. We are very careful to be considerate of each other, and since we're doing this for extra fun (not to compensate for anything missing), we will pause or stop if a situation or person bothers one of us. It has helped keep things exciting, without detracting anything. Of course, not everyone has a good outcome, or they find that jealousy is too much to handle.

[darkmoon]

Only works if he constantly returns to you after he has been elsewhere, otherwise there is jealousy and insecurity, and only if he thinks you are absolutely great in bed, and that any other body was just there to satisfy momentary lust.

 

 

 

 

And no discussions about who when and what, just that you (or him) went out without you, the third person should not be that relevant, for that makes the situation more like an affair, rather than a pass to have an occasional fling.

Edited July 30, 2018 by darkmoon

[Kirsty91]

Obviously there's a lot of negativity about it due to various reasons compared to "normal relationships".

 

If you BOTH still love each other more than anything and constantly reassure each other that you will never leave him/her for a resultant "fling" from such an open relationship, and you're both of the same mind (basically are able to separate love from lust) then you are in for a winner of a long term relationship.

 

I personally think that if you go into an open relationship purely just because you're bored of your partner - for whatever reasons! Then the chances are your relationship won't last.

 

You BOTH have to be of similar mindset. You both have to be completely honest and open with your wants and desires no matter what within your relationship. You have to talk about and agree on do's and don'ts, and understand what boundaries there are as well get a feel of what rules could be broken under certain situations - if any! A proper loving relationship is all about appeasing and being appeased.

 

And on a side-note, if you're a woman I'd just like to quote the best advice I've ever known for keeping your boyfriend/husband from straying away from you - "keep his balls empty and he'll never have the desire to look at another woman".

 

As for the forum title though, I think it depends vastly on all open relationships; that it basically works or it doesn't there's no manual for this sort of thing. The hard part is you both discussing if it can work long term, or if not then you might as well just end your relationship and start dating normally again.