Paying Etiquette Question

[Els]

The free water thing: that's in the US, right?

 

 

In most Western countries that I've been to, sit-down restaurants provide free tap water. US, UK, Western and Central Europe, Aus, NZ, etc. Where do you live that doesn't do that?

 

I didn't know it was ever acceptable for anyone to ONLY take the free water though, lol!

[clia]

In most Western countries that I've been to, sit-down restaurants provide free tap water. US, UK, Western and Central Europe, Aus, NZ, etc. Where do you live that doesn't do that?

 

I didn't know it was ever acceptable for anyone to ONLY take the free water though, lol!

 

As long as other people at the table are ordering drinks or food, it's not a big deal here for someone to just drink the free water.

[Els]

As long as other people at the table are ordering drinks or food, it's not a big deal here for someone to just drink the free water.

 

 

Darn, someone should've told us that BEFORE we visited the US! :laugh:

[NuevoYorko]

It's not really so much about the cost of a single beverage IMO. It's about whether we want to impress a person.

 

I doubt many women are out to take advantage of a man if they hope he'll buy her glass of diet soda. They are probably looking at this as a cue that he thought it was worth this traditional dating gesture to show that he was perhaps interested.

 

Refusing to offer is a clear social signal that he is not interested.

 

Personally I tend towards avoiding catering to gender or other stereotypes but if we are going to participate in a traditional activity like dating, even if it was initiated online, I understand the expectation that traditional roles and behaviors will be in play.

 

Woman tries to look pretty, man pays for the sodas. That's traditional dating behavior and if we want to change it up I don't think Match.com or any other mainstream dating site catering to the most average of human beings is going to be the place it happens.

[No_Go]

This came up in another thread, but I didn't want to derail that topic further. I've always considered it "good manners" to offer to contribute to payment if you contributed to the cost. My question: Is it considered "bad manners" to not offer to contribute if you didn't contribute to the cost?

 

Scenario: Person A and Person B meet up at a location. Person A orders something and Person B orders nothing or water (free). Should Person B offer to contribute or pay for Person A's order?

 

I’d personally not contribute if I haven’t consumed anything.

 

It happens e.g. if I’m going to see a show and they offer alcoholic drinks- since I don’t drink I just get tap water, I don’t think is weird.

 

Btw for dates I really find it weird someone paying for my soda or coffee as a ‘gesture’. For convenience- absolutely. I can’t imagine splitting a 3 dollar bill after having 2 coffees with anyone. For bills under 20 dollars (with anyone) I’d rather pick the whole bill than fuss who ate what - it’s too petty and I don’t have time for that.