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I think she's taking me for granted.


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perceivesadden

It all started when I met her at this amusement park in New Jersey. I couldn’t really afford that trip, but all my expenses were paid for because it was the prize from a win free tour contest the company I work for organizes each year. It was really hot that day and as I was lining up for some cotton candy and soda, she accidentally bumped into me and dropped her wallet. I handed the item back to her and met her eyes; which is the precise moment when I knew she was the one.

 

She smiled at me and we ended up spending the rest of the day together, stuffing our faces with junk food and getting on the more exciting rides. We’d been going out for 3 years when she decided it was time she moved in with me. Now several months down the line, I feel like she doesn’t even care anymore. She hardly speaks to me when she’s home and she’s always out and about with her girlfriends / office mates. I feel like she’s completely taken me for granted and I’m just some guy she comes home to. When I look into her eyes, I feel like she’s just not the woman I fell in love with on that sweltering day in NJ.

 

Should I open up to her? Do the same thing and give her the cold shoulder? I don’t want to lose her, but if her feelings have changed, then I don’t want to be the person that holds her back.

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MountainGirl111

This is kinda sad, somethings missing...and yes, many relationships DO get into a pattern of taking the other person for granted! This absolutely happens. I think you should talk to her about it. Many couples start out being really nice to one another and paying attention to one another and being thoughtful and stuff...but then it can get to where they even start to ignore one another. Reasons for this vary. Different relationships need different things to keep it alive and satisfying. A lot can be "seen" and perceived when you look into someone's eyes and if the light is gone that's no fun.

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Should I open up to her? Do the same thing and give her the cold shoulder?

 

 

No, it's pointless because she's already gone. Tell her things aren't working out and she needs to leave.

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Should I open up to her?

 

I think you over-estimate your acting abilities if you think she isn't already aware of some of this. And this might be the reason for her continued absences.

 

Not sure there's anything to lose by telling her calmly how you feel. And once that's been said, shut up and listen. With that info in hand, you can make a better decision...

 

Mr. Lucky

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You do have to talk to her about this. You live together for heaven's sake. Communication & trust should be there.

 

Be specific about what you want. You can't say I want things back the way they were. That's too vague. Discuss that you would like to have dinner together or spend evenings cuddled on the couch. You try planning some stuff for you to do together.

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