How can I get past the first date and create a meaningful relationship?

[Johnny_Rico]

You obviously are doing something right as you managed to get six dates in two weeks. I would not be that concerned with your lack of second dates so far. You have only been on six dates so far and from what you say its sounds like you only have been rejected by three of them, one of which sounded like she may have been on the fence (the one that cancelled the last second). I would just keep on going on more dates. If you get 10 rejections in row, then there probably is something you are doing wrong, three rejections however could just be bad luck. At times I have had a string of five rejections for second dates in a row, while there have been other times when three or four women in row would agree to a second date.

 

 

Finally you are unlikely to get truthful feedback on what they thought of you. It is unlikely women will say the real reason for why they didn't want a second date as people are generally socially conditioned not to be critical of people they do not know well.

 

Well, I think I have finally figure out why I am having a hard time. I finally got some honest feedback from a girl and she thought I was an awesome guy, the date lasted 4 to 5 hours. It is because at my age women want to get married and settle down and not move from the area. It comes across in conversation that I may be relocated overseas in the next couple years and they are not willing to move and think they would be holding me back. I also have a high standards, and the women I am interested in are probably looking for husbands. My schedule and job also are intimidating and not conducive to a relationship apparently. I think the solution here, is either A) not mention this aspect on a first date, or B) wait until I am settled down in one area- which may be difficult and requires some sacrifice.

 

So far of the girls I have met, two girls want to be friends and hang out, one texts and calls me a lot, and a have a second date with one girl coming up.

 

SO the moral of the story: don't come across unavailable/busy, likely to move, or that your career comes first. I will avoid mentioning anything more than a passing reference about work, training, relocation etc.

Edited August 20, 2018 by Johnny_Rico