potew Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 I broke up with my LDR boyfriend week ago and I don't know if it was good decision.. But I need to start the story from beginning. He is from USA. I am from Europe. We were together for 8 months (6 of this months he was in Europe so we meet from time to time during weekends and everything was fine). 2 months ago he needed to go back to USA. The first month of him being in USA was ok - we talked, we made plans to meet, everything was as good as before. But suddenly month ago he slowly text me less and less. I was really frustrated about this, asked him what is going on and why he is not communicating with me as before, but he was just saying that I'm overreacting. So I decided to step back and didn't push him to contact me for a week. But nothing changed - he was texting me even less so I told him to call me to talk with me about what is going on. Because he was saying that he loves me and wants to be with me but I haven't seen it in his communication. I gave him few days to call me in his free time. But he didn't. I was calling him few times and he didn't answer or call me back. After that few days of waiting when I saw he didn't even read my last message to him I text him (I was trying to call him but he still didn't answer his phone) that I can't be with him anymore, that it was amazing time with him but I just can't be with him like this when he doesn't even have 5 minutes to call me. I am not contacting him since that time and he didn't even read that message (or he did but he hide it on Whatsapp so I can't see that). And now I am lost. I don't know if I really overreact and pushed him away 3 weeks ago with freaking out or it was his way of ending this relationship to just ghost me. I would love to hear any of your opinion about this situation because we really had plans together and I am also a person that sometimes is too much and overreact and I am still working on it. Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 You did the right thing. Communication is very important in all relationships, but especially long distance ones. It's hard to know what was and is in his head, but his actions - or more to the point his in-actions - make it very clear he's not invested in your relationship. Grieve the loss and move forward so you can be available for a relationship with someone who will never leave you hanging and wondering what's going on. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted August 15, 2018 Share Posted August 15, 2018 In an LDR communication is all there is. Without that you have nothing. You didn't mention any plans to close the distance so this was one of those things that was fun while it lasted. Link to post Share on other sites
Whodatdog Posted August 16, 2018 Share Posted August 16, 2018 Long distance relationships are difficult with the best of relationships. It just doesnt sound like he was that interested in keeping this relationship going long distance. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted August 17, 2018 Share Posted August 17, 2018 Yes, you did the right thing. I would also add that he was out of line telling you that you were overreacting. Your feelings are real and rather than dismissing them, a good partner would acknowledge them and discuss solutions with you Link to post Share on other sites
Kranbir8 Posted August 23, 2018 Share Posted August 23, 2018 Long distance relationships are difficult with the best of relationships. It just doesnt sound like he was that interested in keeping this relationship going long distance. I am totally agree with you here. It's bit hard to maintain to keep the long distance relationship. I have had the same situation and lost my GF 2 months ago. Link to post Share on other sites
glows Posted August 25, 2018 Share Posted August 25, 2018 I don't think the ldr is that bad. The OP didn't say they'd never have the opportunity to live together again (in the same locale). What IS deplorable is the fact that he had no balls to tell you he was feeling strange or off or needed time to think. He just left you in the dark. People tend to do that when they're half-grown or immature but need time to think and are afraid of backlash or your reaction. You may have let your frustration get over the top and it scared him. Honestly though, what does he think you're going to do? Get on a plane to the US and start banging on his door uninvited like a mad woman? If it got out of hand and your texts/phonecalls did sound a bit crazed, just back off. If they were only respectful and you never made any threats of showing up in the US uninvited etc, he's not been respectful to you, your time together and has no integrity. ......and honey, if he has no integrity, why would you want him in your life? Link to post Share on other sites
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