How do I her feel better?

[griffin30]

My girlfriend has really low self-esteem and confidence. We’re very open in our relationship, and she’s told me that this is the reason why she can be very insecure sometimes too. Well, I recently landed a gig doing some high fashion photo shoots for a local magazine. I’m a photographer, so I spend a decent amount of time at work being around Colombian, Lima, Australian, Kiev, and even Thai ladies who are models.

 

This has only made her more insecure and since she gained a lot of weight lately, I know she’s been feeling really down with her self-image. How do I help her feel better about herself? She’s a beautiful woman and I don’t care about how much she weighs and all the other physical stuff. All that doesn’t matter because I love her, but I don’t just don’t think it’s enough for her anymore.

[d0nnivain]

She is the only one who can fix her self esteem issues.

 

You can probably help her lose weight by planning more active dates & cooking healthier meals together. Do give her compliments.

[glows]

Can you clarify why she's experiencing weight issues? It may or may not have to do with diet and exercise. When was the last time she had a routine check with her doctor? Depending on her age and her genetics, most women in general should be getting regular check ups by the time they hit 40. If she's younger than that she still shouldn't be complacent about her health. Encourage her to see a doctor and be more serious about her health.

 

Also, has she specifically cited the models you work with as a reason for her insecurity or are you jumping to conclusions and inferring that? There is a lot more to beauty than what the eye (physically) beholds. If she's suffering from self-confidence issues it may have a lot more to do than physique only.

 

A person who compares his or herself to others without being able to filter and mitigate harsh comparisons that may not be relevant to that person's lifestyle and life goals is likely suffering from esteem and identity issues that go a lot deeper than skin deep. She should try looking into therapy or uncovering what's been bothering her about herself for so long. It's important that she not just find her confidence but her identity . I don't think she has done this yet and is confused about where she sees herself, possibly what she may have gone through in the past and she is unable to see her future. Be encouraging but I think you both need to be smart about this and tackle those deeper underlying issues.