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2 years almost to the day, and he's back


FoundMyStrength

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Hi FMS,

 

I don’t know if you still check your thread, but I have some questions for you…

 

I guess you were very surprised when he contacted you after 2 years. What did you mean when you thought he would do the right thing? Only contact you when he was a free man? Contact you to apologize? Or that he worked on his marriage during those 2 years? How did your affair end? Did you express you were hurting? If you expressed you were hurting, I would find it very insulting that he came back as an attached man. Maybe one positive thing is he didn’t lie about his current situation… What did you say to him when you found out he’s still married? Did you say anything? And what did he say? Did he got the message?

 

I think it was a very brave thing you did. I have experienced different periods of months of NC with my MM, but he kept coming back every time. And every time you’re curious what they have to say. You hope they have changed. I still have that feeling unfortunately... although we are in permanent NC. I hope that feeling will fade with time. So I think I would have done the same thing in your situation, so don’t beat yourself up. It's hard, but now you know definitely he hasn’t changed. What would you have done if he did came back as a divorced man and you were single? Would you considerate it?

 

How did you move on from the affair? Did you take your time before you started dating? Were you jealous of his wife? I had a PA and didn’t have a D-day. I feel like I’m left to pick up the pieces all by myself while he just can go on with his life… I read you’re in a real relationship now and that gives me hope. I guess it’s really different compared to the relationship you had with your MM?

 

Wishing you all the best!

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