Why am I never a guys "first choice?"

[Dodgersfan11]

Okay, here's my issue, I'm never a guys first choice, a guy meets me takes me out, but its not enough-I somehow find out through social media that he likes some other girl who is sexier, more outgoing, has more friends than I do. And you know how that makes me feel? Like S%^!!!! C'mon, I think to myself what she has compared to what I have. Then I see why he likes her instead of me. Why do I even try to make an effort? Its impossible to keep a man when there are a bunch of younger, sexier, traveled women out there and instagram proves my point! Guys troll on there and look at model showing off their assets. Why bother?

[anduina]

Have you never crushed on celebrities?

[Whodatdog]

If it were all about hotter younger and sexier, theres would only be 10 percent of people in relationships, and everyone else wouldnt have boyfriends/girlfriends. Unfortunately in this fast world now, its all about meeting and hopping into bed. Which is all well and good, but it prevents the emotional attachment, which is what keeps relationships together. All sorts of people are in great relationships, and they arent hotter younger and sexier. I know its cliche, but when you least expect it, you'll meet someone that you click with. And its not always the person you think it would be.

[ChatroomHero]

I'd look at it from the perspective of guys who would choose you first and you kind of go, "Eh". I am sure that has happened, the same as guys you choose might not put you first I am sure there are guys that choose you that you don't put first. That's just how it works, you keep going until you find one that works.

[glows]

It sounds like you make terrible choices in men and your neck is stuck looking in the wrong (same) direction. If you are able to change the way you view yourself and re-evaluate what's important to you, I think you'll find better quality men.

 

It's a bit weird why you're finding out more about the men you date through cyber-stalking them on social media instead of depending or trusting in the valuable time you have together in person.

[alphamale]

try dating men who are educated

[carhill]

OP, as a control, meet some guys in real life through your social circle or social events and compare.

 

'First choice' as a generality usually revolves around popularity or social status. The more popular and/or socially powerful, the more likely to have a wider pool of 'first choice'. Less, less.

 

In the relationship realm, all it requires is one, presuming one isn't doing the serial thing rather is looking for a life partner. The challenge, as you see, is getting to that one. The larger the pool of potentials, the more likely to get there.

 

Back when I was in the reproductive battles, we called it (male) the bigger dick fatter wallet factor. There was always another guy with a bigger dick and a fatter wallet. Normal mating stuff.