siren8272 Posted September 5, 2018 Share Posted September 5, 2018 So recently my mother got out of the hospital for having two blood clots and my grandmother died...so I have decided to take my mother on a cruise. Well my step dad decided to throw a fit stating it's not safe and they are throwing women overboard. I told him I would love to experience a cruise with my mother...he starts going nuts saying "I can't tell you nothing"(I'm 36 yrs old wtf you wanna tell me )..my mom to break the tension asks jokingly "can I go?" My step dad said with anger in his voice "sure go they might throw both of you overboard" . I was pissed.... Now what would your reaction be? What would cause him to say this knowing his wife's mother died and she recovering from blood clots? Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted September 5, 2018 Share Posted September 5, 2018 Well, obviously he’s an ass. I’m guessing this isn’t unusual behavior for him? Link to post Share on other sites
Author siren8272 Posted September 5, 2018 Author Share Posted September 5, 2018 He is an ass....I've told my uncle's they are not happy Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted September 5, 2018 Share Posted September 5, 2018 What would my reaction be? I would go on the cruise with my mother. He is an ass, but if your mother plans to stay with him... I would avoid talking with him as much as possible. I have no patience for this kind of behavior... Link to post Share on other sites
Author siren8272 Posted September 5, 2018 Author Share Posted September 5, 2018 Why would he say some mess like that Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 5, 2018 Share Posted September 5, 2018 I understand wanting to go on a cruise with your mom after everything but before he said these things why were you planning to exclude your mother's husband from the trip? Do you think part of his negative reaction was because you didn't invite him along? I also don't think he wished death on either of you. In contrast, he expressed fear for your safety. he did it badly but still he was not wishing you harm. I think his concerns are unfounded & borne of ignorance but still he wasn't saying he hoped you died. He was saying that he was afraid harm would come to you & he wants you to be safe. Why do you see his expression of fear as a death wish? 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author siren8272 Posted September 5, 2018 Author Share Posted September 5, 2018 I didn't ask him BC he's expressed he didn't want to go on a cruise. He swears they are dangerous(even though he use to go all the time on cruises and now I am old enough to go now all of a sudden they are dangerous) ...yea he might have been concerned but the fact that he said that mess in an angry tone simply BC I want to go on vacation with my mother ...he's the kind of guy who thinks women should always be at home....what he said was out of line and his "concern" IMO is fake as can be...if he's scared that's his issue not mine...how else am I supposed to take this..if you get thrown overboard a ship what will likely happen ? Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted September 6, 2018 Share Posted September 6, 2018 I’d suggest that you disengage from this mode of trying to figure out why he would say something like that. It’s obvious he’s a jerk and I’ll bet he always has been. Instead of being surprised and getting all wound up about the idiotic things that come out of his mouth, why not just look at him like he’s an idiot and go about your business? You can waste a lifetime on trying to figure these people out. There’s not a lot to figure out. They open their mouths and out pops insults and put-downs. Just keep your distance from him and go on the trip with your mom. However, while I don’t agree with his overblown assessment of cruises, my issue with them is that there are far too many of them and we’re polluting our oceans an incredible amount because of them. That’s the main reason I don’t support them. And there is a certain amount of danger in being on any floating object out in the middle of the gigantic, insurmountable ocean where we can die very quickly. The chances of anything severe happening is slim but it’s like hopping on a jet — the danger is there. Should you let that control your life? No. But don’t walk into it thinking there’s no danger. After your stepdad’s outburst, do you think your mom will go on the trip? Also, do you think she’s well enough? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author siren8272 Posted September 6, 2018 Author Share Posted September 6, 2018 She said she's going and to bump him...she said he's mad he's old and broke (he has a welding and brick Mason certificates he refuses to use out of laziness but complains about the pay at Walmart ) Link to post Share on other sites
bathtub-row Posted September 6, 2018 Share Posted September 6, 2018 She said she's going and to bump him...she said he's mad he's old and broke (he has a welding and brick Mason certificates he refuses to use out of laziness but complains about the pay at Walmart ) Sounds like a sad existence. Some people just make their own problems. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 6, 2018 Share Posted September 6, 2018 If your mom is content to remain married to him, there is not much you can do. You plan your cruise & have a good time with mom celebrating life. Let him be miserable. Going forward just try to ignore him; no matter what he says, don't give him the satisfaction of a reaction. He's your mom's problem, not yours. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted September 6, 2018 Share Posted September 6, 2018 Oh, he wasn't serious. He's just an old grump. He doesn't want your mom going off on a swinging cruise without him. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
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