How honest to be to a friend?

[bluebear2364]

I'm wondering how honest I can be to my friend. Here's the situation.

 

Derek and I have been pretty good college buddies ever since freshman year. (We're both seniors now.) We hang out sometimes, but it's always the same-old, same-old. I mean, we grab dinner every Sunday, and possibly another meal or so during the week. A few movies here and there, and of course, the bar. But it just seems like that's all we do.

 

I feel like just wanting to spend more time with this bud of mine. He plays golf, and I do too (though terrible at it). I asked him next time he's going golfing, let me know. He's like, "we usually play on Saturdays, but not for the next few weeks or so because of football games." There's a great theme park, Cedar Point, near us. I asked him if he wanted to go sometime. He replied: "Yeah, possibly in October, a few of us are planning on it sometime."

 

I know, from what I said above, you might have the impression he doesn't want to spend (more) time hanging out with me. That's possibly the case, but I don't think so. I mean, we really get along great, and have a great laugh/time every Sunday and so. But, he also has a girlfriend now, and it just seems she's taking all of his time, almost to the point where our traditional Sunday dinners are going down the drain. I understand a girlfriend is important, but I also feel that I'm being left out of it all.

 

So what should I do? Should I talk to him about it? And how? You know college guys, who don't really like to talk (although I'm more of the sentimental kind). Should I just let it be? When he has time to golf/theme park, then I go, and not "push" him to it? (Well, not push-push, but something.)

 

Any advice would be appreciated.

[She's Come Undone]

If he had any deeper feelings for you than just a friend YOU would be the girlfriend who is taking up all his time.

[Merin]

If he had any deeper feelings for you than just a friend YOU would be the girlfriend who is taking up all his time.

 

 

Agreed.

 

I would start spending some time with your other friends as well.

[JS17]

Isn't bluebear a guy?

 

Unfortunately this is what happens in life. Often people find relationships taking up a lot of their time leaving their friends out in the dust. He needs to make some time to hang with his buds (and it sounds like he is) but you have to deal with the fact that his girlfriend is now in the picture and he wants to give her a good chunk of his time. I know it sucks I would still suggest the same thing as Merin, start spending more time with other friends.