zoey15 Posted September 7, 2005 Share Posted September 7, 2005 So I meet this guy, and he is sexy. I mean really sexy! We have a lot in common, which is very rare. Usually the most common stuff stops after the first day of meeting someone. Anyway, it's been two weeks and he's already asking me to be his lady. He lives in another state, so I went to his home town to meet him this last weekend. We didn't have sex! Which was really hard cause we were attracted to each other..... but is this a sign of an abuser? It's a bit fast for all this I think. Link to post Share on other sites
Craig Posted September 8, 2005 Share Posted September 8, 2005 You are right in that he may be an abuser BUT he might not. Did you get a chance to see how he treats people close to him like parents or sibliings? If so was there tension (or worse) there? I wouldn't categorize him as an abuser yet but I'd keep my eyes wide open looking for more signs that he might be abusive. Is it fast? Yes for some people and no for others. He could be the "one" or he could be your nightmare. I think it's too soon to tell. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zoey15 Posted September 8, 2005 Author Share Posted September 8, 2005 Thanks I will keep my eyes open for any other signs. I didn't get the chance to see him around his mother or how he is with his siblings, but I did get to see him w/ his four year old son. He was just like a normal father would be. Link to post Share on other sites
RainyDayWoman Posted September 8, 2005 Share Posted September 8, 2005 i think you need a liitle more info on this guy before you go and classify him as an abuser. that's like saying someone who has a headache must have a brain tumour. Link to post Share on other sites
Author zoey15 Posted September 9, 2005 Author Share Posted September 9, 2005 You're right rainydaywoman, but I was abused in the past so I just wondered. That's all. I didn't want to get into another bad situation, plus I've never had someone move so fast. I mean I've only known the guy for two weeks or a little over now. I was hit as a child and watched my four siblings get hit, and I'm tired of ending up in those situations. Link to post Share on other sites
RainyDayWoman Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 You're right rainydaywoman, but I was abused in the past so I just wondered. That's all. I didn't want to get into another bad situation, plus I've never had someone move so fast. I mean I've only known the guy for two weeks or a little over now. I was hit as a child and watched my four siblings get hit, and I'm tired of ending up in those situations. i hear you, zoey. it never hurts to be cautious. Link to post Share on other sites
kscholze Posted September 9, 2005 Share Posted September 9, 2005 what type of abuser? Me and my ex dated for one week and were spending the night with eachother, No sex for a month. Im not an abuser. It did end up going to fast though, she fell in love after 2 months and I was in love but didn't want to rush so i didn't tell her. Ended up ruining the relationship Link to post Share on other sites
Author zoey15 Posted September 9, 2005 Author Share Posted September 9, 2005 When I say abuser, I mean like the man using his fist, choking, hair pulling, threatening death upon you. Unfortunately I've been through some bad experiences. The reason I was being cautious is because I've never had anyone get that involved so quick. Usually the guy will take a few dates or so before he's asking me to be his lady. What do you mean kscholze by ruining it? She was full force, but you weren't after time passed? Do you think I'm screwing myself over by going along w/ this? I want a committed relationship, but I'm just not sure I want to go through the whole long distance thing again. I just got out of one. I left the LDR because I didn't get much contact from him, and this new one is all contact. There can never be an in between, ha? Link to post Share on other sites
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