Belle23 Posted October 3, 2018 Posted October 3, 2018 I was FWB (yea, yea I know bad idea) with this guy for a bit. I felt myself catching feelings, so I told him we had to stop. We agreed that we would still remain friends and be cool. We stopped talking briefly, but when we did start talking/hanging out again, it really seemed like we were better than ever. Suddenly, he’s done a 180. He’s completely cold towards me but fine toward everyone else when we’re with mutual friends. When we were with mutual friends the other night, I asked him about a trip we all had planned and he nastily said he’s not sure he’s even going anymore. I texted him later if everything was ok, but he dodged the question. I’m so confused!! We seemed great. Wtf happened?? I’m trying not to take it personal and thinking maybe something is going on his life because even though he acts like he hates me, he still snapchats me. But I don’t get why he’s only being nasty to me in person. Any advice?
stillafool Posted October 3, 2018 Posted October 3, 2018 Are you guys still having sex? If so maybe he has cooled off and is looking among your other friends for a new FWB. How was he nasty to you?
Author Belle23 Posted October 3, 2018 Author Posted October 3, 2018 No, we’re not having sex anymore. I ended the sex part. But we agreed to not let not having sex anymore ruin our friendship. We actually became better friends until he gave me the cold shoulder. He’s being cold by being short/refusing to talk to me while we’re out with mutual friends as a group. If I text him, it’s one word replies.
stillafool Posted October 3, 2018 Posted October 3, 2018 I guess you should call him and tell him you thought he was cold to you and ask him why; again. I have no clue. 1
healing light Posted October 3, 2018 Posted October 3, 2018 This guy sounds like he caught feelings for you back and he's all bent out of shape now that you stopped the sex. He doesn't sound like he's capable of being just friends with you. And if I'm wrong and he didn't like you that way, why would you want to keep someone around who is mean to you?
Author Belle23 Posted October 4, 2018 Author Posted October 4, 2018 I probably shouldn’t want him in my life for how he’s acting. It’s just disappointing how things are turning out. It seemed like we’d be good since things seemed so well when the sex ended.
preraph Posted October 4, 2018 Posted October 4, 2018 Guys don't just want to be friends. He's acting like a five year old who can't play with your toy anymore. Ignore him or block him. 1
Scarlett.O'hara Posted October 4, 2018 Posted October 4, 2018 The simple answer is because he isn't getting casual sex anymore. He is likely annoyed and frustrated that as a "friend" he is required to make an effort without the added perks he is used to getting. However he can't say anything about it without sounding petty obviously, so he letting you know in other ways that he is resentful. This is the downside to having a fwb with someone in your social circle because they have to end at some point and it changes the dynamic and expectations of the friendship. I suspect you would have got a lot more positive attention from him when the possibility of sex was still on the table. Once he finds someone else to fill that sex void, he probably won't be so bad, but for now things between you are going to be a bit tense. I can't imagine how hard it will be for you when he starts bringing new women around though. That being said, I think you did the right thing calling this off now before you were even more hurt. If you can have some space away from him for a while, I think that might be good thing. 1
Author Belle23 Posted October 26, 2018 Author Posted October 26, 2018 Ok, so I have an update. He’s been a lot nicer. However, one minute it feels like he’s pursuing me and the next not. It’s really hot and cold. I feel fed up and was actually quite rude to him yesterday. How can I get the hot/cold game to stop? Or should I just drop him?
Recommended Posts