What would you do if...?

[luxurious86]

What would you do if someone meets you for the first time, asked you for your personal information and finds you on social media and add you?

 

i guess that's the reason why people don't want to invite me because i asked for their person info and give them too much physical contact. the next time when I meet someone new, ill just ask about their hobbies. Im tired of people thinking im a creep and calling me crazy then they cuss me out and give me negative remarks. then they ignore my messages on social media, text messages and phone calls. They block me on social media right away after I just met them. They never told me about it.

[luxurious86]

I need comments please:)

[Zapbasket]

Ok, I'll bite.

 

Yes, when you first meet someone you should ask about their hobbies. That's just good social etiquette. It sounds like maybe you need to work on cultivating better social skills. Social media adds are not synonymous with social skills. If I've only met someone once, for instance, and we're not connected through a real-world social network (we work out at the same gym; we work in the same department; etc.), it's highly likely I won't accept a social media friend request unless we really hit it off.

 

From your post, it sounds like you inundate people with social media friend requests, messages, texts, calls, and even physical contact without first ascertaining whether the interest is mutual, or perhaps without discerning that the interest is NOT mutual. If you are a man doing this to women, yes, that makes you at best really annoying, at worst a creep. But regardless of whether you are male or female doing it to men or women, reading social cues is a critical skill for making it in the real world, and even the social media world--though I think social media has severely dulled people's ability to navigate intricate human relationships in a healthy, mature, self-aware way.

 

And even your post: you clamor for responses, even going on someone else's thread to ask for responses to yours, and yet you didn't give much information for people to accurately suss out what the problem is. Read other posts on here to see how people present their issue: They give gender, age. They give at least one example of the kind of problem they're having with other people that drove them to seek advice.

 

So based on what you've given in your post and what I observe, some work on your self-awareness and social skills is in order. The best way to cultivate that is to take a long, long break from social media, and commit to a period of time to work with a good therapist. Note that I'm not implying you're screwed up, only that you need to learn some skills--just as all of us do.

 

Good luck.

[luxurious86]

Ok, I'll bite.

 

Yes, when you first meet someone you should ask about their hobbies. That's just good social etiquette. It sounds like maybe you need to work on cultivating better social skills. Social media adds are not synonymous with social skills. If I've only met someone once, for instance, and we're not connected through a real-world social network (we work out at the same gym; we work in the same department; etc.), it's highly likely I won't accept a social media friend request unless we really hit it off.

 

From your post, it sounds like you inundate people with social media friend requests, messages, texts, calls, and even physical contact without first ascertaining whether the interest is mutual, or perhaps without discerning that the interest is NOT mutual. If you are a man doing this to women, yes, that makes you at best really annoying, at worst a creep. But regardless of whether you are male or female doing it to men or women, reading social cues is a critical skill for making it in the real world, and even the social media world--though I think social media has severely dulled people's ability to navigate intricate human relationships in a healthy, mature, self-aware way.

 

And even your post: you clamor for responses, even going on someone else's thread to ask for responses to yours, and yet you didn't give much information for people to accurately suss out what the problem is. Read other posts on here to see how people present their issue: They give gender, age. They give at least one example of the kind of problem they're having with other people that drove them to seek advice.

 

So based on what you've given in your post and what I observe, some work on your self-awareness and social skills is in order. The best way to cultivate that is to take a long, long break from social media, and commit to a period of time to work with a good therapist. Note that I'm not implying you're screwed up, only that you need to learn some skills--just as all of us do.

 

Good luck.

 

Ok I'm a woman