A relationship that ended very quickly but stings deeply

[feifei91]

Hi im fei from PH. its my first time to post thing on forums so forgive me if its quite lengthy and since english isnt my first language there could be lots of grammar mistakes but i just really needed to release this feeling from my chest...

 

So around august of this year i started chatting with a guy i met on a dating site.. he was a foreign guy that decided to stay in my country. we decided to meet one day after chatting for few days and it was almost like love at first sight.

 

After seeing each other for few days he told me he wants to make it official with me as he is falling in love with me and is thinking of a future together, and since i was feeling the same way i agreed to make it official. We feel so connected with each other and it feels like we knew each other for a very long time, we enjoyed each others company and we did a lot of adventures on those few days that we were together.

 

One day he needed to transfer to a different apartment so i helped him look for a new one and a friend of mine offered her apartment as she said she's about to transfer to another city so we came to her apartment and i introduced him to my friend but after a few days i felt something weird, i felt that there is something going on with him and my friend but i shrug it off..

 

Before i met him i have already planned and bought a ticket to go to a different city for 10 days and him knowing id be gone for 10 days, booked a ticket so he can follow me to where i was going but i have to leave first as he can only be away from his online job for 3 days...everything was ready, the tickets and the hotel where we will stay upon his arrival.. so came the time for my flight, everything was okay. we keep communicating and he was always checking up on me. but came the day he needed to transfer to my friends apartment. everything just suddenly change. he dont even message me back as fast as before and as a girl we get this intuition and my intuition tells me something is off. i messaged him and asked him how my friend is and he told me she didnt leave yet that shes staying on the next door apartment so all the more that my suspicion rose up, to clear my mind i ask him if he has been talking to my friend. he said "no" but later on he told me that they agree to go to the internet provider together when he could have went alone or with his friend that he is living together from his country.. so from jealousy i ask him again about him and my friend and he told me my jealousy was fanatical and he wants to cut contact with me and end things. i tried to apologize and ask him not to as i was so in love with him but he said that he is certain for his decision. so i let him be.

 

i was completely lost, alone in the city which i have already expected to meet him and have good memories with him. we only dated for less than a month but i feel so empty, i feel so broken, i have been crying my hearts out coz i felt deep connection with him and i think he felt the same way too. i dont know why im hurt this much when the relationship was very short and we never even slept together. i m

 

i got home from my trip and just been crying my heart out, i learned from my friend that he went to travel somewhere else instead. i messaged him asking him how he was and i told him how hurt i was which he said that he was feeling the same but his mind is telling him to stop the connection with me. then i asked him if he wants to remain friends but he said he cant be to me just friends.

 

then yesterday, something was pushing me to open my fb as i will find my answers there. ( i deactivated fb for sometime) my gut was pushing me to the point where my hands where shaking as i was logging in my credentials on fb and the first post i saw on my feed was my friend and my ex picture on their trips i confronted my friend about it which she denied but the pictures gave away the answers.

 

now i dont only have to recover from a heart break but also from a friend's betrayal which stings so deeply that i dont know how to start healing from. all i know is to let it go but letting go is easier said than actually doing it

[ExpatInItaly]

I'm sorry you're going through this, OP.

 

This friend is no friend. You to cut ties with her altogether.

 

As for this man, well, it seems things moved too quickly and unfortunately you got attached before really knowing him. Be wary of guys that dive into relationships like this, and declare that they are falling in love when they've barely spent any time with you. It's not coming from a sincere place. Evidently, the deep connection you felt wasn't mutual or he wouldn't have done what he did. He sounds like a complete jerk.

 

The sting will fade in time, and you will realize you haven't lost much. My warning bells would've been ringing a while ago with this guy.