He broke up with me 6 days ago and he's in a new relationship already?!

[Raknoi]

So I've been seeing this guy for about 4 months, 2 months officially. He was head over heels for me, legit whipped, we would be on the phone all day and everyday. About 4 weeks ago he fell ill and when he's ill he doesn't really like talking on the phone etc and that's ok with me. That week he was ill, we talked but not as often as I'm used to. I became paranoid. He started following loads of girls on insta and there was this one particular one with almost 10k followers that he seemed to like every single one of her pics. I remember he kept sending me pics of her saying "you'd look good in that" etc.

 

I was like wth? Don't send me pics of other girls (celebs are diff but an ordinary girl - no thanks.) Anyway, I check her profile and I've seen that he's commented on her pic and she's replied back - it was a vague comment about her body. So she comments on one of his pics in a flirty way and I feel like crap.

 

Anyway, these past 4 weeks we were talking but it wasn't the same as usual. I went to see him last week and it was not nice lol felt awkward, he didn't really hug me much or anything. Didn't even ask if I got home ok lol :/

 

I also feel like he met this insta girl 2 days before seeing me, he kept joking about it and stuff :/

 

Anyway, few days later he says he needs to talk and I'm panicking - I knew what it was gonna be :/ and then he tells me he doesn't feel the same about me anymore. This guy dropped the L word on me, we talked about marriage and kids :/

 

I am obviously devastated, haven't been eating, lost weight, no sleep whatsoever. The next day after he broke up with me he's asking me if I'm ok like wtf? No I'm not :/ then something terrible happened to me the day after (don't wanna talk about it) he again, messaged me to see if I'm ok. I called him that night and we spoke and he said he can't change his feelings for me etc. He said he became distant cos sometimes he needs his space (I gave him that space) so how come he's got a new gf?

 

Yesterday I see that he's talking about how he's got a girlfriend LOL. I was like WOOOOW. It hurts. Also found out that he blocked me from seeing his snapchat story - I wanna know why he's got me blocked from seeing his snapchat story but he hasnt actually deleted me? So he can see mine? He also still has me on all other socials, he's unfollowed most girls from instagram but still has me on there - even though I'm his ex lol? I know he said there's no bad blood between us but I'm still confused? Is it in case things don't go well he will come back?

 

We had deep convos about marriage and stuff and I know that he's doing the same to this girl. I just feel like they're gonna last longer cos she's actually more attractive than me (dresses like a wh*re though) do you think they will last long?

 

He dropped me - someone who gave him everything for a girl who *looks* very attractive??

 

Do you also think he'll come back to me? Is this why he hasn't blocked me off all the socials?

 

Please be nice I'm finding it very hard :/

And don't just tell me to move on lool I am trying I just want to know everyones thoughts.

 

Can i just add shes 20 in uni and Im older actually have a job lool

Edited October 15, 2018 by Raknoi

[d0nnivain]

He moves fast. He found a shiny new girl & has moved on. When starting a relationship realize that anything that starts fast & feels intense is likely to crash & burn just as quickly, which is what happened here.

 

 

It is sad & unpleasant when a break up happens. It hurts but he is not a guy you should be losing sleep over. Give yourself a good mental shake. See this for the whirlwind it was then get more involved on campus to meet new people.

 

 

Disconnect from him on all social media. You don't need to see what he's posting.

[Zahara]

I'm sorry you are hurting.

 

Unfortunately, when a guy starts announcing marriage and kids two months into dating, it usually is a red flag. It's called love bombing. Those deep conversations are usually ploys to attract you.

 

His feelings for you were shallow and he wasn't truly thinking about a future with you but rather spewing words he knew would reel you in. Plus, the ones that rush, are usually in love with the high, feel good feelings. It's very apparent that he wasn't really committed to you in how he was very quick to discard you and jump onto a new woman.

 

He hasn't blocked you because he still wants to have a lifeline to you just incase his new women doesn't work out -- so he has you as a fallback.

[ExpatInItaly]

You are going to be much better off without this guy, for a few reasons:

 

1) You can't take it seriously when someone talks of love and marriage and children when you've only dated them a few months. It's not coming from a sincere place, because they simply don't know you well enough to reasonably start planning for a future like this. These types tend to be impulsive, speaking from a place lust, or trying to fill a void of some sort. It's not mature, rational and sound decision-making.

 

2) What kind of blockhead sends his girlfriend photos of other women to tell her to dress more like them? Especially when he's commented on said woman's body in a public forum?

 

3) When he needed "space" it was because he'd met someone else who caught his eye. This sort of person gets easily distracted when a shiny new ball rolls into view, and it's really better for you to let him go chase it. Someone who is that easily led away from you wasn't very invested to begin with.

 

Honestly, this new girl hasn't come away a winner here. The guy she's got is a dud. You don't see it yet, because it's new and it hurts, but this dude was not The One for you.

[carhill]

Welcome to LS.....

 

Likely a monkey-brancher. Common when young and some people never outgrow it. People feel out and/or groom new partners/potentials while married or LTR and then move on.

 

If you're lucky there might be a bonafide loved one there holding your hand when you die but else expect there to be many such events such as this in life and you'll do some of your own too.

 

Where do you want to go from here? I get all the forensics stuff but time and experience will teach you that most of it should be focused on self since self is all we can control. What did you learn from this relationship?

[HumanMachine]

By the way that you type I assume you’re mid teens? If so don’t worry, you’ll meet plenty of people who will appreciate you.

[Raknoi]

By the way that you type I assume you’re mid teens? If so don’t worry, you’ll meet plenty of people who will appreciate you.

 

Lool im in my early twenties ? naive when it comes to love

[Dis]

OP, never, ever keep in touch with a guy who dumped you and from the sounds of it, cheated on you

 

When someone cuts ties with you, you become stoic in every way possible

 

No more texts, no more dignifying their, "Are you ok" nonsense questions with a response, no reaching out for support or answers, no mopping and not eating because some douche stopped liking you

 

Instead, you block him...everywhere. You never say another word. You accept you're not going to get the answers you want and that is perfectly ok. You reach out to people who actually care about you for support. You eat, you sleep. Again, you never say another word to him...ever.

 

The thing some people don't understand about reaching out to ex's, asking them, "why?", going to them for support, accepting breadcrumbs, actually thinking they care if you're ok or not is....it takes dignity away from the dumpee. It makes you look like you can't stand on you're own two feet. It feeds the dumpers ego. It let's him know he got to you.

 

Whenever I broke up with my ex's or when I got broken up with...I never said another word. That was that and for good reasons. They didn't like it. They thought I'd be a poor, helpless trainwreck longing for them, unable to be something without them. And when they found out the opposite was true, they were angry, sad, upset. And I moved on with my life.

 

#stoic

 

Keep your chin up