Lorenza Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Do you tell your date if the place they pick is too expensive for you? Or you just assume they are willing to treat you? I'm gonna meet a guy for a first time and he asked me what kind of meal I'd like to have so I suggested sushi and he was keen on it as well. I can of course afford a sushi plate at normal places, it's not a problem. But he got back to me and said he has booked a table somewhere and when I checked their menu my jaw dropped! It's super expensive! I would never pick something so fancy on my own. I told him all about myself, that I'm currently a student with a little teaching job on the side, so does it mean he wants to take me there? I find it awkward to just ask that straight away. Also, I don't have a taste for fancy places and would rather go somewhere super simple, would I look like I have no class if I suggest it? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 At the risk of repeating myself, a first meeting should be in a coffee shop. You have no clue if you'll click and you (or him) will end up spending tons of money. So, you could contact him and say you've been thinking about it and you'd feel more comfortable if you'd just meet over coffee and cake for the first time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gretchen12 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Be yourself. Class doesn't come from money. I'd just tell him "whoa I saw the menu. I don't like their prices." It doesn't matter who pays. If it's not good value, you basically just have two people being robbed while each pretending it doesn't hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
lavenderandvelvet Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 You can suggest a different more affordable place. Joe Sushi is out of my price range for a regular meal, why don’t we go here instead. Your date may have a different concept of cheap and expensive than you do n Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Oh for crying out loud, just tell him you don't feel comfortable going to such an expensive place...then suggest an alternative. Note: It's not uncommon that a guy will dine and dash on a date. I read a horror story that a lady went on a date to an expensive steakhouse. The guy starts ordering expensive bottles of wine, pounding them down, had his $80 steak. He got so intoxicated, that when he went to the can, they kicked him out. So here she is, sitting there, then the waiter hands her the check. She got suck with the bill while he hopped in a cab and disappeared. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 17, 2018 Author Share Posted October 17, 2018 I wrote and explained that the price is way too steep. But then he insisted that he treats me. I asked him if he really wants to treat someone he might never see again in case we don't click, but he just said he'd enjoy the evening with me despite the outcomes Maybe I'll just suggest a cheaper place? Otherwise he really seems keen on taking me there. I agreed to get dinner instead of coffee just because I'm so tired of coffee dates, been on 6 lately! Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 When the check comes, don't let him get up and go to the can until he pays. lol. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 I wrote and explained that the price is way too steep. But then he insisted that he treats me. I asked him if he really wants to treat someone he might never see again in case we don't click, but he just said he'd enjoy the evening with me despite the outcomes Then enjoy the sushis :-) I have been on tons of coffee dates and it's boring but still better than having to sit across a man you don't like and look at him chew for 2 hours. THEN you feel you have to accept his 2nd date invitation cause he just shed $200 on dinner. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 17, 2018 Author Share Posted October 17, 2018 You can suggest a different more affordable place. Joe Sushi is out of my price range for a regular meal, why don’t we go here instead. Your date may have a different concept of cheap and expensive than you do n Definitely, as I'm pretty sure his incomes are really high. Here in Sweden people earn a lot in computer science field Which also makes me question, if I should even look for guys who earn that much? I will study 2 more years and that would definitely bring lack of balance. I think most will want to engage in expensive activities as it is common in this city and will get tired of dragging me along even with the best intentions to treat me as often as possible Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 I'm living in the wrong country lol 2 Link to post Share on other sites
RedHead5 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 If he suggested such a place I would assume he intends to pay for your meal. Especially if you told him you are a student etc. If it were me, I would go enjoy the sushi and the company. If you are really troubled, mention that you looked it up and it is very expensive and tell him he didn't have to pick something like that in a nice way. His response will tell you what you need to know. If he has the money to treat you and wants to do it, why not enjoy it? I dated both ends of the spectrum in the last year (very wealthy and not-so-wealthy) and I am not picky either way but some guys like the feeling of treating a girl. Je wants to impress you. Enjoy it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 17, 2018 Author Share Posted October 17, 2018 Then enjoy the sushis :-) I have been on tons of coffee dates and it's boring but still better than having to sit across a man you don't like and look at him chew for 2 hours. THEN you feel you have to accept his 2nd date invitation cause he just shed $200 on dinner. Sushi is a good option cause it doesn't take too long to eat up Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Sushi is a good option cause it doesn't take too long to eat up When is the date?? We want an update :-) Link to post Share on other sites
RedHead5 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Ah, nevermind I just saw you did mention it to him. Go out and quit worrying. Guys like that are just accustomed to more expensive places. Go enjoy the experience and the company. And don't worry about him making more money than you. As long as you don't start making demands and looking like a gold digger, if he invited you to do things, he enjoys your presence. I had alot of great experiences with the wealthy guy I dated. I never requested anything of him but im pretty sure he loved showing me a different lifestyle. If you like him, continue to see him. If you dont click, you don't owe him anything further. Nothing wrong with being a lady and letting a man treat you sometimes... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 17, 2018 Author Share Posted October 17, 2018 When is the date?? We want an update :-) It's on Saturday evening, prime time:D hope it's worth it! I rarely go on dates on Saturdays Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 I think you should go and enjoy yourself. The finer things in life are a pleasure. And anyways, if he's paying you are eating! But only accept if you really like him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 It took me way too long to figure this stuff out. Men love lighting us up and making us happy. He wants to give you a beautiful experience and light you up with happiness. There's not much that thrills a man more than truly delighting a woman he fancies. Enjoy the date. You are not at any time obligated to continue. After busting my slump with a few early dates a few weeks ago, now I'm getting to the great guys who are just bursting to blow me away with divine dates. It's awesome! ENJOY! I certainly am 2 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 It took me way too long to figure this stuff out. Men love lighting us up and making us happy. He wants to give you a beautiful experience and light you up with happiness. There's not much that thrills a man more than truly delighting a woman he fancies. Enjoy the date. You are not at any time obligated to continue. After busting my slump with a few early dates a few weeks ago, now I'm getting to the great guys who are just bursting to blow me away with divine dates. It's awesome! ENJOY! I certainly am way to go RS 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gretchen12 Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 If he wants to go, then go ahead. But the food BETTER be good! One time my family went to a casual seafood restaurant just for a family dinner and the fish turned out to be $150 usd. That's one fish. But it was not good :-( We was robbed. Maybe the food at that sushi place really is good or he has always wanted to try it. Link to post Share on other sites
Logo Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 When the check comes, don't let him get up and go to the can until he pays. lol. Indeed. Proper dating etiquette also requires the woman to grab him by the belt in case he stands up and starts heading toward the CAN while ordering him: “Pay up! Buster!” (Insert frown) If that doesn’t work try shaming. Point a finger and slowly say: “Cheaaaap Daaate” while squinting. lol Link to post Share on other sites
Logo Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 After busting my slump with a few early dates a few weeks ago I know. It’s a cruel world out there RUBY slippers. Stay strong! Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 Do you tell your date if the place they pick is too expensive for you? Or you just assume they are willing to treat you? I'm gonna meet a guy for a first time and he asked me what kind of meal I'd like to have so I suggested sushi and he was keen on it as well. I can of course afford a sushi plate at normal places, it's not a problem. But he got back to me and said he has booked a table somewhere and when I checked their menu my jaw dropped! It's super expensive! I would never pick something so fancy on my own. I told him all about myself, that I'm currently a student with a little teaching job on the side, so does it mean he wants to take me there? I find it awkward to just ask that straight away. Also, I don't have a taste for fancy places and would rather go somewhere super simple, would I look like I have no class if I suggest it? Sounds like he's trying to impress you as well as a place he tends to go offer too. I would go and see if he's the type of person you want to be with. I wouldn't go to a coffee shop as I don't drink coffee. I've taken dates to all you can eat Chinese buffet, then I soon found out that the girl I had taken to it has been there several times prior. Oh well. We all shouldn't judge the place where to take someone on the first date it could anything. What matters is are you liking the person or your not? Link to post Share on other sites
olivetree Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 If he insists, just go. I personally don't like first date meals unless it's a natural extension from something more casual (eg. you went for a walk, you click so you grab a bite). If he's used to the finer things and you're not really into that though it might spell incompatibility, but for now - it's just a meal Link to post Share on other sites
Logo Posted October 18, 2018 Share Posted October 18, 2018 I know. It’s a cruel world out there RUBY slippers. Stay strong! Ruby Slippers, For the sake of clear communication, I hope you realize I was teasing you there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted October 18, 2018 Share Posted October 18, 2018 Ruby Slippers, For the sake of clear communication, I hope you realize I was teasing you there. Yeah, I still don't know what you're saying. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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