alphamale Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 sounds like he's trying to rob the cradle Lorenza Link to post Share on other sites
SunnyWeather Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 15 whole years???? No, 15 3/4 years I'm not sure if you are referring to him being 15 year's older than her or if you read it as him having lied about his age by 15 years. The way I read it is he's 15 year's older than her. Not a small amount, but certainly not out of bounds for some either. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 well...if he's rolling in dough he may be worth a second look Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 It's like this - he has no age written on his profile. I'm 29 and my age limit was 37 on the app (no particular reason why it's 37, guess could have been a bit more too, but I wanted to keep it under 40 in any case) Usually the app doesn't show anyone older than the limit, even if the profile has the age hidden. But this guy is actually 44 Doesn't look like 44, but he is Link to post Share on other sites
SunnyWeather Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 how old did you think he was when you agreed to go on the date? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 He took me to 2 expensive places. For drinks he also wanted to go to a place where only very wealthy people go. I think it must have been one of the most expensive bars in town. Later in the evening he admitted that doesn't only go fancy places, but that he wanted to take me to the best ones to impress me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 20, 2018 Author Share Posted October 20, 2018 how old did you think he was when you agreed to go on the date? 36 or 37. I guess its not that huge of a difference, but somehow the fact that he's in his forties threw me off, I don't know why Link to post Share on other sites
losangelena Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 He took me to 2 expensive places. For drinks he also wanted to go to a place where only very wealthy people go. I think it must have been one of the most expensive bars in town. Later in the evening he admitted that doesn't only go fancy places, but that he wanted to take me to the best ones to impress me. Impress you so you'll overlook the lie of omission, his age difference, and his obvious disregard for your boundaries of not wanting to date a man over 40. As if his money could buy him morals? Hell to the no. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
SunnyWeather Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 lorenza, like I wrote previously, if you're feeling something, like the guy, then go another date (if he asks). what have you to lose? It seems your a bit hung up on the cost of places he's taken you to. I get it, if one has not been exposed to that world before. Why not experience something new and enrich you world view? And, maybe find yourself enjoying the company of a cultured man you might like? This so reminds me of when I was your age and dated very seriously a man the same age diff as you. He introduced me to whole other world that still leaves an impression upon me today. I didn't end up marrying him, but I do look back quite fondly on our time together and how I widened my life experiences Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 So was he hiding/lying/or not being upfront about his age? Or did it just not come up at all? I had an ex that lied about his age. Turns out he was a liar in every way possible. People that need to lie about small things, lie about every thing else If he is lying or misleading, I would consider that a huge red flag and would pass on him 2 Link to post Share on other sites
thefooloftheyear Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 The date was actually pretty nice and the guy too, but he revealed that the age on the app was incorrect and that he is in fact older. He's 15 years older than me :/ hmm.... That's some bush league crap there....And quite frankly if a guy made a post that a woman was 30 pounds heavier(or 8 dress sizes larger) than she said, the people here would be going apoplectic... Sounds like you bit the hook anyway....Oh well... TFY 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 20, 2018 Share Posted October 20, 2018 he hides his age on the app Just because of the experiences I've had, that's a pretty sketchy thing to do On OLD we're pretty much expected to give out our pertinent info and mostly everyone does The fact that he dated you, knowing you're 15 years younger and hid his age on the app is not good. That to me is misleading. It's pretty obvious a woman in her late 20's might have an issue dating a guy in his 40's. It's kind of like he lured you in just to see if he could get you on the hook and then tell you. That's not honesty in my book Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 lorenza, like I wrote previously, if you're feeling something, like the guy, then go another date (if he asks). what have you to lose? It seems your a bit hung up on the cost of places he's taken you to. I get it, if one has not been exposed to that world before. Why not experience something new and enrich you world view? And, maybe find yourself enjoying the company of a cultured man you might like? This so reminds me of when I was your age and dated very seriously a man the same age diff as you. He introduced me to whole other world that still leaves an impression upon me today. I didn't end up marrying him, but I do look back quite fondly on our time together and how I widened my life experiences I had a good time with him, so maybe I'll give him one more chance. The conversation was great and I like the way he looks. But on the other hand, I'm not sure I want to experience more of that world of expensive food and rich people wearing designer clothes. I like shabby things, cats, thrift shops and being in nature. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 So was he hiding/lying/or not being upfront about his age? Or did it just not come up at all? I had an ex that lied about his age. Turns out he was a liar in every way possible. People that need to lie about small things, lie about every thing else If he is lying or misleading, I would consider that a huge red flag and would pass on him I wouldn't call it lying, probably omitting, as some other poster said. Also, he didn't answer the first time I asked. And when I asked the second time he said he hopes it's not a dealbreaker. But you know, maybe I wouldn't go out with him if I knew. Though it was also stupid for me to assume he's in my age range. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 Ah, I don't know. Just doesn't seem like a good start. On one hand - great connection while interacting, attractive, on the other - he hid his age and wants to impress me with money.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Ah, I don't know. Just doesn't seem like a good start. On one hand - great connection while interacting, attractive, on the other - he hid his age and wants to impress me with money.. I can only think of 2 options. 1. He lied about the (hidden) age on the app so that he would show up in younger women's matches. 2. He was honest on the (hidden) age about being 44, but there was a glitch which made him appear in your matches. Given that he hid his age I would think it was option number 1. Also, he said he doesn't normally dine out at those places, do you think he is trying to be someone he is not in order to impress? It will probably backfire if that is what he is doing, since you want someone more natural and casual it seems? I think lying and omitting are both negatives - so either one seems shady to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 The date was actually pretty nice and the guy too, but he revealed that the age on the app was incorrect and that he is in fact older. He's 15 years older than me :/ hmm.... Like I said in my post number 36 Also, often when a man wants to 'treat you' in an expensive way on a 1st meeting it's to compensate for something else.... Totally unacceptable, he should be drop instantly. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Lorenza, he's out there to fool younger women. You think you're the only one he fooled like this? yet all his money didn't win any other woman's heart so far, it's to wonder why. He deceived you, yes he lied to you. It's unacceptable, I don't give a heck most people do it, he lacks morals. Like Dis once I gave a 2nd chance to a man that had lied to me about his age, he turned out to be a compulsive liar and cheater. Lying came naturally to him and he felt no guilt about it. 44 and trying to fool 20ish women and impressing them with his money? I have one word 'tacky'. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
SunnyWeather Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Like I said in my post number 36 Also, often when a man wants to 'treat you' in an expensive way on a 1st meeting it's to compensate for something else.... Totally unacceptable, he should be drop instantly. It was just sushi, you make it sound like it was some Michelin 4 star restaurant. For some people, spending that kind of money on dinner is a normal daily occurrence. Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 I wouldn't call it lying, probably omitting, as some other poster said. Also, he didn't answer the first time I asked. And when I asked the second time he said he hopes it's not a dealbreaker. But you know, maybe I wouldn't go out with him if I knew. Though it was also stupid for me to assume he's in my age range. He didn't answer when you asked? Hmm... Probably because he was trying to get you on the hook It's not lying but it's def not the epitome of honesty I'm a big believer of transparency when dating. This guy is a little too opaque for my taste And no it's not stupid of you to assume, it was sketchy of him to go after a woman 15 years his junior and not let her know when she asks him what his age is. He's not off to a great start. Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Lorenza, he's out there to fool younger women. You think you're the only one he fooled like this? yet all his money didn't win any other woman's heart so far, it's to wonder why. He deceived you, yes he lied to you. It's unacceptable, I don't give a heck most people do it, he lacks morals. Like Dis once I gave a 2nd chance to a man that had lied to me about his age, he turned out to be a compulsive liar and cheater. Lying came naturally to him and he felt no guilt about it. 44 and trying to fool 20ish women and impressing them with his money? I have one word 'tacky'. This is really on point Bad taste and dishonest on his part Feels icky to me 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 Oh and I'd also like to note I went out with a different guy once or twice who did the same thing He was in his forties, I didn't know He blew a ton of money on our dinner, had his hands all over me These types of guys are creeps Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 (edited) After my experience with the one that lied about his age I drop every man that lied about their age even by 2-3 years. I have zero tolerance for these types of stupidities. A couple of times I even had men tell me I should lie about my age on my profile cause I looked much younger.....idiots!! At the time I was 48, I told them I may look 40 but my mind, my heart, my life experience, my internal clock, my desires, my hopes and my patience IS 48! This man did not only lie about his age, at the same time he lied about where he's at in life, his level of energy, his level of fertility, the years he has left before retirement. Lying about your age is lying about who you are. Nothing less. Own who you are! If you are 44 and wanting to date 29 year olds then be that and be true to yourself. Edited October 21, 2018 by Gaeta 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted October 21, 2018 Share Posted October 21, 2018 I experienced something similar a few weeks ago. His profile said he was 46, but when I met him he revealed he's actually 58 He also tried to impress me with money. I blew him off for the lying, luring me under false pretenses, and he's still texting me that he can't stop thinking about me Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lorenza Posted October 21, 2018 Author Share Posted October 21, 2018 It was just sushi, you make it sound like it was some Michelin 4 star restaurant. For some people, spending that kind of money on dinner is a normal daily occurrence. The whole evening however cost him around 150 dollars, so that's really pricey for a first date. I doubt he spends that much on a normal occasion Link to post Share on other sites
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