InvisibleLady Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 "I was reading about the 5-HTP. Very interesting. Have you had any adverse side effects? Are you taking 100mg?" I usually take 200mg at breakfast and again at lunch, so a total of 400mg daily. When I was really weepy I would take 200mg more in the late afternoon. Currently I take them in liquid soft-gels that include other vitamins and herbs (the brand is Irwin Naturals). It's not a complete cure but it has definitely helped me. But I'm hoping in the not too far future I won't feel the need to take any Oh, and no side effects that I've noticed. Thank you for this info! And you are doing great! Link to post Share on other sites
Author briarpatch Posted October 25, 2018 Author Share Posted October 25, 2018 See, talk about compassion. All of you have helped me more than anything. It is not a "misery loves company" but so nice to have this outlet and thanks to you all. A lot of awesome insight and information so I'm going to continue to post here as an outlet. I had a hard time yesterday afternoon. I was actually feeling happy! And guess what??? I wanted to text MM. It was like I was having a good day and the only thing that would make it better was if I texted him. It wasn't because I wanted to say "ha!, I AM living without you.." I was just happy and I guess feeling that way reminded me of him... and not my misery. THANKFULLY I kept telling myself over and over (thanks to the wise words read here) "No new contact, no new hurt. No new contact, no new hurt". So, I typed what I wanted to say to him on my computer, read it and then deleted it. It worked. So, now I don't have the regret or agony of a response and I don't have that overwhelming feeling to do it today. I am overall feeling better and I am trying everything, and I mean everything in my power to get over this. Time will help but until I talk to my husband, I don't think I can ever really move on. It literally haunts me at night. I wake up next to him and think about how if he knew, he wouldn't be right there beside me. I will him to forgive me, like he can read my thoughts. Anyone that says they can have an A without any guilt at all either is lying, does not have a heart or..the guilt comes later. Much later. AND I do think females have a harder time with it than males. When I tell you I have no doubt Lee is walking life perfectly normal, I mean he has probably moved on to someone else. I have thought about that. What if I was just one of many? Now that I'm looking hard, I can see it possible. Wow, dumped by a AP for a new AP. Low of low right there. I now wonder if the A hadn't ended suddenly and when it did...where would I be at, mentally, I have a feeling I would be worse off than I am now... Link to post Share on other sites
NotADayGoesBy Posted October 26, 2018 Share Posted October 26, 2018 Wow, dumped by a AP for a new AP. Low of low right there. I now wonder if the A hadn't ended suddenly and when it did...where would I be at, mentally, I have a feeling I would be worse off than I am now... Try to keep that thought in mind...how much worse it would be (God, can it GET any worse?) if things had kept on, and use that to feel glad he'd out of your life. I'm having a really hard time with this, but reading threads here has helped. I know that if things had continued mine not only would have turned physical, but things would have completely blown up. My emotions are so out of control that I would have been reckless and done dumb things, all in the name of just wanting to be around him. My AP ended things when he confessed he was already in an affair. I know I wasn't technically dumped for a new person, but that's how it feels. But then I console myself by thinking of all the hurt and difficulties he has facing him at some point in the future when it all blows up. Because as we all now know, it always does sooner or later in one way or another. Link to post Share on other sites
Maybelle Posted October 27, 2018 Share Posted October 27, 2018 Briar, writing your feelings down but not sending them is so therapeutic for me also! Being able to express in some form all these emotions but not opening the door to new contact is working so well for me. My biggest problem is looking at his professional profile online. Seriously, I feel like a stalker. Today after over a week of not looking I looked and his company updated his picture. We were talking the whole time he got that picture made and it hit me hard, the longing and need for contact. I think this looking is hindering my healing. I think maybe you and I are a lot alike. I like to feel in control. I like to feel like I am in control of my life. And trying to accept some days will be good and some days will be bad is so opposite of what our personalities are. We want to KNOW when things will get better. This is for sure a learning experience. Link to post Share on other sites
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