Why do I attract womenizers, perverts?

[Vanity1]

Not only do I attract them, I date them, unknowingly at first.

I’ve been in two relationships, my first one the red flag was months after seeing his room and he had ‘ sunshine girl’ posted all over his room... for those who aren’t familiar with sunshine girls, they’re posters of women dressed scandalous- they look like porn stars. And then one time going through his photos like actual photos not Facebook, I saw that he had took a picture of a girl in her uniform in a short skirt, just her butt part - she wasn’t aware.

 

Years later I started dating abother guy. When I first went to his house I noticed a calendar facing down- it was of naked females. He was trying to hide from me. I ignored it. Then I found out he was on a flirting app, later found personal videos of girls he had sex with. He and his friends would share pervert ‘ funny’ videos of naked girls doing weird things with their vagina.

 

And everything they posted on Facebook would be sexual videos, even my first ex. They both live strip clubs also and known to be cheaters.

[Simple Logic]

Doesn’t every woman attract womanizers and perverts?

[Vanity1]

Doesn’t every woman attract womanizers and perverts?

 

Maybe I should’ve said in the title ‘ why is all I could get is perverts and womanizers’. And if they aren’t perverts they are desperate you know those decent guys but they go all crazy when they get female attention. Lol... this is very telling about me.

[basil67]

You've got two examples here. Is there anything which leads you to believe your experience is different to other women? It's just that most of us can attract men who are good, bad or middling.

[sabaton]

]Not only do I attract them, I date them, unknowingly at first.

Womenizers are attracted to physically attractive women, and since they have the guts to approach women as they possess the self-confidence and the physical looks for women, for attractive women to want to sleep with them - lots of women end up attracting and dating womenizers.

 

I’ve been in two relationships, my first one the red flag was months after seeing his room and he had ‘ sunshine girl’ posted all over his room... for those who aren’t familiar with sunshine girls, they’re posters of women dressed scandalous- they look like porn stars.

You should see an autobody mechanics office. They have posters of naked women all over the walls. Men with high levels of testosterone are going to be a.. a little crude about showing it off.

 

And then one time going through his photos like actual photos not Facebook, I saw that he had took a picture of a girl in her uniform in a short skirt, just her butt part - she wasn’t aware.

Millions of young men do that. It's called having a high sex drive and easy access to the internet/ women walking around in revealing clothes and enjoying the attention.

 

Years later I started dating abother guy. When I first went to his house I noticed a calendar facing down- it was of naked females. He was trying to hide from me. I ignored it. Then I found out he was on a flirting app, later found personal videos of girls he had sex with. He and his friends would share pervert ‘ funny’ videos of naked girls doing weird things with their vagina.

Wait, I'm confused

Are you saying this guy is a womanzier because he sleeps with a lot of women, and he does so in a casual manner, or are you calling him a womanizer because he's a young man with the sex drive and sexual desire for attractive women - that most young, healthy, normal, men share among them and you come from a conservative culture/religion or something and the men you are accustomed to growing up around you aren't as carefree and brass about their sexuality and about the appreciation we all have for the body of a beautiful woman?

 

You do realize the majority of men have pictures of attractive women on their cellphones, facebook pages, computers and what not?

 

And everything they posted on Facebook would be sexual videos, even my first ex. They both live strip clubs also and known to be cheaters.

There you go. That guy is a high-sex drive dude with a desire and yearning for a variety of attractive women. If that's not your thing, dump him.

 

Maybe I should’ve said in the title ‘ why is all I could get is perverts and womanizers’. And if they aren’t perverts they are desperate you know those decent guys but they go all crazy when they get female attention. Lol... this is very telling about me.

Women attract a variety of men. From men who are very popular with women, to men who have as much of a chance getting laid with any girl as much as Russia has the chance of getting rid of Putin. There's nothing wrong with you, it's just how the nature of men and women has been like for thousands of years, naturally.

Men want to get laid, so they're going to approach women and try their luck. That means that sometimes women attract good men(physically attractive + mentally stable + emotionally stable + good finances + education - criminal record) and they're going to attract bad men(overweight and short, bald, facially unattractive +broke/physically attractive but emotionally unstable + tendency to cheat on their partners).

 

You just need to keep going and eventually you'll find yourself a good man. Dating is hard for everyone.

Edited October 21, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Fix spacing

[norudder]

<snip>

 

Millions of young men do that. It's called having a high sex drive and easy access to the internet/ women walking around in revealing clothes and enjoying the attention.

It was a photo HE took, not one found on the internet from some porn site. It was basically upskirting and that's illegal in many places, so no it's not normal and is definitely creepy behavior.

 

As is taking sex videos of partners and sharing it with friends if they haven't consented to either of those.

 

Guys with high drives are going to look at attractive women in real life and online. However there's a line of respect for another person's boundaries that decent guys don't cross.

 

It speaks of the degree to which he objectifies, how far does it go before he values her as a person with more to offer than physical.

 

OP, it takes a lot of trial and error. Keep trying. Practice looking for the similar flags or traits of this type. Some are better at hiding it than others but you'll start spotting the commonalities. Be comfortable dropping them sooner than later.

 

Good luck.

Edited October 21, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Truncate quote

[d0nnivain]

I'm assuming you are relatively young. Posters decorate door rooms. Past a certain age, people get framed art.

 

Looking at scantily clad women hardly makes a guy a pervert or a womanizer. Neither does following women on social media who post those pictures of themselves to attract attention. For you to label that relatively common behavior as perverted tells me your standards for the men you are willing to date are very strict; that will cause you to reject the majority of men.

 

So at a minimum you need to restrict where you look for a dating partner. I'd stay off mainstream dating sites. You could try something like Christian Mingle.com or any other sites you know of with a religious angle. You also need to spend more time around Church or religious based activities. Go to church socials, on retreats, to Bible studies etc.

[hotpotato]

Probably most guys have things like that lying around. Social media makes it even easier to for guts to find scantily clad ladies.

 

I'm not sure how to avoid this aside from dating someone who is extremely religious.

 

However, if this guy is taking upskirts of unconsenting women, I recommend running for the hills

[Logo]

Past a certain age, people get framed art.

 

 

 

 

 

Hurtx10,

 

 

 

Just buy them frames for their posters. Problem solved.

[Redhead14]

Not only do I attract them, I date them, unknowingly at first.

<snip>

 

It isn't that you attract them, they are attracted to women . . . period. You aren't the only woman they go after. It's not you, it's them

Edited October 21, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Truncate quote

[preraph]

Ugh. Perverts. Well, if you keep attracting them, you need to rethink your wardrobe, because you're hitting some note with them. So think about toning it down. I know you'll say it's all normal, but get some more objective opinion from a friend who doesn't dress like you or, well, your mother or father even.

[Vanity1]

I'm assuming you are relatively young. Posters decorate door rooms. Past a certain age, people get framed art.

 

Looking at scantily clad women hardly makes a guy a pervert or a womanizer. Neither does following women on social media who post those pictures of themselves to attract attention. For you to label that relatively common behavior as perverted tells me your standards for the men you are willing to date are very strict; that will cause you to reject the majority of men.

 

So at a minimum you need to restrict where you look for a dating partner. I'd stay off mainstream dating sites. You could try something like Christian Mingle.com or any other sites you know of with a religious angle. You also need to spend more time around Church or religious based activities. Go to church socials, on retreats, to Bible studies etc.

 

These aren’t guys who just look at you with thirst and watch porn from time to time I’m not a prude. I’m talking about guys who take photos up womens skirts unknowingly. There are decent guys who aren’t religious. I’m talking about guys who have sex with prositutes when they have a girlfriend. It doesn’t matter what age you are if you have a girlfriend/ wife be respectful.

Edited October 21, 2018 by Hurtx10

[Vanity1]

Ugh. Perverts. Well, if you keep attracting them, you need to rethink your wardrobe, because you're hitting some note with them. So think about toning it down. I know you'll say it's all normal, but get some more objective opinion from a friend who doesn't dress like you or, well, your mother or father even.

 

I don’t dress scandalous, at all. I don’t even wear shorts, the most I show are shoulders. It doesn’t take much for women to get attention with guys like these, no morals, no boundaries.

[Vanity1]

Womenizers are attracted to physically attractive women, and since they have the guts to approach women as they possess the self-confidence and the physical looks for women, for attractive women to want to sleep with them - lots of women end up attracting and dating womenizers.

 

You should see an autobody mechanics office. They have posters of naked women all over the walls. Men with high levels of testosterone are going to be a.. a little crude about showing it off.

 

Millions of young men do that. It's called having a high sex drive and easy access to the internet/ women walking around in revealing clothes and enjoying the attention.

 

Wait, I'm confused

Are you saying this guy is a womanzier because he sleeps with a lot of women, and he does so in a casual manner, or are you calling him a womanizer because he's a young man with the sex drive and sexual desire for attractive women - that most young, healthy, normal, men share among them and you come from a conservative culture/religion or something and the men you are accustomed to growing up around you aren't as carefree and brass about their sexuality and about the appreciation we all have for the body of a beautiful woman?

 

You do realize the majority of men have pictures of attractive women on their cellphones, facebook pages, computers and what not?

 

And everything they posted on Facebook would be sexual videos, even my first ex. They both live strip clubs also and known to be cheaters.

There you go. That guy is a high-sex drive dude with a desire and yearning for a variety of attractive women. If that's not your thing, dump him.

 

Women attract a variety of men. From men who are very popular with women, to men who have as much of a chance getting laid with any girl as much as Russia has the chance of getting rid of Putin. There's nothing wrong with you, it's just how the nature of men and women has been like for thousands of years, naturally.

Men want to get laid, so they're going to approach women and try their luck. That means that sometimes women attract good men(physically attractive + mentally stable + emotionally stable + good finances + education - criminal record) and they're going to attract bad men(overweight and short, bald, facially unattractive +broke/physically attractive but emotionally unstable + tendency to cheat on their partners).

 

You just need to keep going and eventually you'll find yourself a good man. Dating is hard for everyone.

 

These guys aren’t attractive, every time I was with my ex ppl would ask me wth I’m doing with him. These guy are high, when you have cocaine and alcohol in your system you grow balls, they aren’t confident.

 

It’s kind of weird to me that people think posting naked women on the wall to be normal, it’s cringey to me. It a woman’s body, relax. Your mom, sister, grandma has a pair a boobs also.

 

I’m calling these guys perverts and wominzers because they are sick, taking pics of girls unknowingly and along with other things.

 

I know the difference between normal guys being guys and sick in the head.

[Hopeful30]

Im going to ask a very personal question and youre in no way obligated to answer.

 

Have you ever been sexually abused?

 

Whats your relationship with your father?

[d0nnivain]

These aren’t guys who just look at you with thirst and watch porn from time to time I’m not a prude. I’m talking about guys who take photos up womens skirts unknowingly. There are decent guys who aren’t religious. I’m talking about guys who have sex with prositutes when they have a girlfriend. It doesn’t matter what age you are if you have a girlfriend/ wife be respectful.

 

You mentioned 2 guys in your first post & implied those were the only 2 men that have ever been in your life. You mentioned photos, posters & a calendar. Obviously a guy taking upskirt photos is a criminal & the cheater is bad news too but the other pictures alone do not make a guy a pervert,

 

Still you are the common denominator in all this. Other then them being unsuitable do you see any other pattern. . . where you meet them? how they act initially? Could you have missed a red flag or 2 early on?

[stillafool]

Doesn’t every woman attract womanizers and perverts?

 

Yes every woman attracts them. You don't have to date them.

[sabaton]

It was a photo HE took, not one found on the internet from some porn site. It was basically upskirting and that's illegal in many places, so no it's not normal and is definitely creepy behavior.

Yes, that is creepy behavior.

 

 

As is taking sex videos of partners and sharing it with friends if they haven't consented to either of those.

But it's perfectly acceptable if they've both agreed that it's fine with sharing it with friends. In the case that the guy you're seeing shared it with his friends, without the ex-girlfriends consent - yes, it's wrong.

 

 

 

Guys with high drives are going to look at attractive women in real life and online. However there's a line of respect for another person's boundaries that decent guys don't cross.

Depends on what those person's boundaries are. I dated a girl who objected to me looking at porn, so I ended the relationship.

 

 

 

If the boundaries are acceptable, like, ''don't sleep with other women while we are exclusive'' and, '' don't take creepy pictures of girls that have no idea what you are doing'' then yes, the guy better respect that if he wants to keep the woman as his partner.

 

 

Maybe that's his way of showing that he doesn't care all that much about the relationship he's in.

 

 

It speaks of the degree to which he objectifies, how far does it go before he values her as a person with more to offer than physical.

 

 

Can you elaborate on this? What do you mean how far he goes before he values her as a person?