So if men are too scared to approach women anymore

[snowcones]

IME, Women have gotten way more aggressive in pursuit of men than they were in the past....I guess those women have decided not to wait on the sidelines for a guy to take the initiative, so they get it going...

 

TFY

I was asking what the men who want a date but are scared do.

As for online dating, I don't think online dating is going to last long. Same for dating from social media. I think all online dating platforms are eventually going to become overrun with sex workers and sex trafficking activity, and the result will be much like how craigslist became too seedy for normal people to want to be on and the adult section had to be shut down. We are not there yet but I think it's on it's way.

Edited October 23, 2018 by snowcones

[Woggle]

I was asking what the men who want a date but are scared do.

As for online dating, I don't think online dating is going to last long. Same for dating from social media. I think all online dating platforms are eventually going to become overrun with sex workers and sex trafficking activity, and the result will be much like how craigslist became too seedy for normal people to want to be on and the adult section had to be shut down. We are not there yet but I think it's on it's way.

 

If online goes out then relationships will completely break down unless society changes are maybe women can start approaching.

[sabaton]

How do men get dates then?

 

 

The women either approach them, or they meet women through tinder, okcupid, plenty of fish, or they meet women through their social groups, and eventually something comes up.

 

 

They do it online or wait for a woman to message them. I see a lot of women being brought here from foreign countries in the future. It's already happening.

I'm confused lol. How does men not approaching women end up in men buying women from third world Countries to be their wives?

 

 

Forget the men! At least they have the option to chase. What about us ladies who have nothing to do on a saturday night

Women also have the option to approach and chase after men. There's nothing wrong with that, it doesn't mean the woman is unattractive, and it doesn't make the guy value her any less because it was she who decided to approach first.

 

 

My mother spotted my father in a crowd of men at the coffee shop they met, and if it wasn't for my mother going up to my father and then hitting on him, I wouldn't have been born lol as my father was too busy with his group of friends to notice the people who were around.

 

To this day my parents are still married to each other and they're very happy together. And all because my mother took it upon herself to go up and talk to that oil-stained guy with the auto body mechanic's monkey suit.

 

That's why I will always have a soft spot for those proactive women, the women with initiative and high self-esteem who aren't just content in sending signals of interest and then sitting pretty waiting to get approached, and instead go up to the men they are attracted to and start talking.

 

I remember this time when I was on the train, and as I was with my head inside a book I wasn't aware of who was around(I got that from dad) so I sat on the nearest seat, and there was this girl there too, sitting in front of me.

 

 

She was physically attractive and young, but because she spent the next 20 minutes of the train ride staring at me, smiling at me, playing with her hair while looking at me, touching her neck, and looking at me up and down and biting her lips and so forth - instead of just leaning over and asking me what was the title of the book I was reading..

 

I ignored her. When I got up to get out of the train, I looked back at her and I smiled. She just kept staring at me and smiling, without getting off her seat and saying hello. I gave her several opportunities to start a conversation with me, but she didn't take them.

 

I'm not too worried because I'm sure she ain't lacking for men who'll approach her, but in order for me to feel attraction for someone I gotta feel desired to, and a woman sending smoke signals at me when I'm so close to her that our noses would touch if I leaned just a bit forward, instead of talking to me, turns me off massively no matter how attractive she is, and on the same vein, I will find a lesser attractive girl than that one to be very attractive, if she approaches me, because she shows herself to go after what she wants, and that makes me feel wanted, valuable and sexually desired.

 

And that's sexy as hell.

Edited October 23, 2018 by sabaton

[Malin889]

People need to get off their phones and start talking again! I can’t tell you how many people I see out and about glued to their phones!

[elaine567]

I remember this time when I was on the train, and as I was with my head inside a book I wasn't aware of who was around(I got that from dad) so I sat on the nearest seat, and there was this girl there too, sitting in front of me.

 

She was physically attractive and young, but because she spent the next 20 minutes of the train ride staring at me, smiling at me, playing with her hair while looking at me, touching her neck, and looking at me up and down and biting her lips and so forth - instead of just leaning over and asking me what was the title of the book I was reading..

 

I ignored her. When I got up to get out of the train, I looked back at her and I smiled. She just kept staring at me and smiling, without getting off her seat and saying hello. I gave her several opportunities to start a conversation with me, but she didn't take them.

 

I'm not too worried because I'm sure she ain't lacking for men who'll approach her, but in order for me to feel attraction for someone I gotta feel desired to, and a woman sending smoke signals at me when I'm so close to her that our noses would touch if I leaned just a bit forward, instead of talking to me, turns me off massively no matter how attractive she is, and on the same vein, I will find a lesser attractive girl than that one to be very attractive, if she approaches me, because she shows herself to go after what she wants, and that makes me feel wanted, valuable and sexually desired.

 

And that's sexy as hell.

 

OK but it can also be seen as weak. She was giving you all the signals and

you didn't have the courage to initiate the conversation, preferring for her to do the work instead.

Justifying it as it is your "preference" and a "turn on" for a women to do the leg work... But the reality is your ego is then not quashed if she rejects your advances

Sounds like your father was the same.

[stillafool]

I'm confused lol. How does men not approaching women end up in men buying women from third world Countries to be their wives?

 

Well, if American men are too afraid to approach American women because of MeToo, etc., men may start to bring over women from third world countries. Those women are poor but very attractive so average to below average looking men can get good looking women that they may not be able to pull here. Some men prefer a submissive woman and those women are just grateful to get a better life.

[sabaton]

I guess if you're too scared to approach a woman, you don't deserve to date one in the first place. Survival of the fittest—you're doing biology's work for it.

 

I'm confused. What is this talk of deserving to date or not deserving something?

 

If a man doesn't approach a woman he doesn't deserve to date a woman, but if he approaches a woman he deserves to date one because he's so ''courageous'' ?

 

 

 

Or then he has to impress somehow once again and in different ways, for him to ''deserve'' to date a woman?

 

 

 

And why are you just thinking about what men need to do to deserve to date a woman, and not what women should do/need to do/ to deserve to date a man?

 

 

A man wanting to feel desired and wanted and thus waiting to get approached by the girl who's sending him smoke signals is a coward?

 

Survival of the fittest—you're doing biology's work for it

SEATTLE—The highest proportion of overweight and obese people – 13% of the global total – live in the United States, a country which accounts for only 5% of the world’s population, according to a first-of-its-kind analysis of trend data from 188 countries.

 

An estimated 160 million Americans are either obese or overweight. Nearly three-quarters of American men and more than 60% of women are obese or overweight. These are also major challenges for America’s children – nearly 30% of boys and girls under age 20 are either obese or overweight, up from 19% in 1980.

 

Yeah, I think we're past the survival of the fittest rule.

Edited October 23, 2018 by sabaton

[stillafool]

An estimated 160 million Americans are either obese or overweight. Nearly three-quarters of American men and more than 60% of women are obese or overweight. These are also major challenges for America’s children – nearly 30% of boys and girls under age 20 are either obese or overweight, up from 19% in 1980.

 

This is another reason men may select women from third world countries.

[sabaton]

OK but it can also be seen as weak. She was giving you all the signals and

you didn't have the courage to initiate the conversation, preferring for her to do the work instead.

How can it be seen as weak?

 

I respected her to take her time - 20 minutes ride - to come up with something to say to me, to get the ball game started. I would have taken it from there.

 

She had many occasions to do so.

 

I had my head inside The Picture of Dorian Gray. And it was clear to see how much I was enjoying the book.

 

She could've have looked at the book and say, ''what are you reading?''

or, '' Is that any good?'' with a smile on her lips and I would have been glad for the interruption, even if I was having a grand time reading.

 

If not that, I'm sure she checked that I had a watch on my wrist, as i was scrolling through the pages and it was visible.

 

She could have simply said,

 

''Can you tell me the time?'

 

I would have given it to her, and then she could have furthered the conversation and I would make it my job to keep chatting.

 

She could have used the time-old tactic I used to emply when I'd approach random girls when I was a teen:

 

''I'm not from around here, can you tell me how to get to x?''

 

This woman was 20-25 years old. Young, yes, but it's not it's very likely for her to be a virgin, right? She must have dating experience with men.

 

She knows she's attractive, so the chances of her getting rejected are pretty low to begin with.

 

Why was she so reluctant to take the proactive action in order to get to know me? I'm not physically imposing at all, no need to be intimidated.

 

Justifying it as it is your "preference" and a "turn on" for a women to do the leg work... But the reality is your ego is then not quashed if she rejects your advances

No, it has nothing to do with fearing getting my ego crushed, and everything to do with wanting to know if the girl is of high quality for a relationship.

 

The very first day I set foot on my college to attend class, I spot this gorgeous girl in line in the cantina. She was like a living, breathing 18th century French doll, with her full, thick blonde hair, huge blue eyes, clear skin, so small and tiny at 4'10'' and with a smile that Tom Cruise had to pay in the thousands to achieve. Yeah, of course she was outta my league by miles, and I didn't see the point in approaching her.

 

I was so awed that I felt Helen of Troy must've have returned from the Elysian Fields. I didn't approach her. I never would have done that.

 

But over a period of several days, because it was a small campus, and people would see each other everyday, I would look at her for a few seconds until she felt there was someone looking at her, and then when she'd look my way I'd quickly pretend I wasn't looking, that I was actually reading the book I was holding in my hand.

 

I crossed paths with her face to face a few times, as she was walking down the stairs and I was on the step below, and we'd look at each other but we never said anything.

 

It would have kept going like this until we graduated or whatever, but she eventually came up to me while I was sitting on the student's longue doing..(you know what hehe) and she straight up started talking to me asking me if we'd known each other, and when I said no, we didn't, she kept insisting until I was like, ''hmm, is she hitting on me?'' and I put the book down and started talking to her.

 

Then she asked me if I wanted to go with her to this event her classmates were going to and that she didn't want to go alone, and I said yes. That girl ended up becoming my girlfriend.

 

See what I mean? She was beautiful, but so were the majority of the girls around with their slim bodies and straight white teeth, and clear skin and full, thick hair, but what made me really like this girl instead of the other girls that were just checking me out was that she displayed a personality that I'm extremely attracted to.

 

1 - high self-esteem. She knew she was beautiful and that the chances of being rejected are low. There are so many beautiful girls that feel like they're just average-looking, and that's really a turn off.

 

2- Determination. She took it upon herself to approach me, because for some reason that still escapes me, she thought I was attractive.

 

3 - Not afraid of rejection. True, attractive women aren't likely to be rejected - but they can be rejected and when they do it's something they've never experienced before, or have experienced once in a blue moon and it still stings when it happens.

 

4 - She took her time. She waited until I was in an enviroment where it wouldn't feel awkward for me to be approached, as I friends were on the next couch and I was pretty at ease when she came up to me.

 

5 - She asked me out and she was the one who asked me for my cellphone number and my facebook page. Which made me feel desired, wanted, sexy and hot, and in turn made me want her much more than I did before.

 

Sounds like your father was the same

Nah. Dad was hanging out with his 5'10'' to 6'3'' friends in a packed coffee shop, as that was the only coffee shop around, and there were lots and lots of young people wanting to watch the soccer game on the TV, and he would have never have seen my mother as the place was so full, and mom's tiny, had she not approached her.

 

 

This is another reason men may select women from third world countries.

Maybe those men should concern themselves with buying a treadmill instead, and laying off the doritos.

 

 

 

What's the point of being with a woman who is not sexually attracted to the guy and is just there because she has a family in Brazil she needs feeding?

Edited October 23, 2018 by sabaton

[stillafool]

Quote:

This is another reason men may select women from third world countries.

Maybe those men should concern themselves with buying a treadmill instead, and laying off the doritos.

 

I wasn't talking about the men because of their weight I was thinking about the men wanting thinner women.

 

 

What's the point of being with a woman who is not sexually attracted to the guy and is just there because she has a family in Brazil she needs feeding

?

 

That is not always the case. When a man is kind to you and rescues you from poverty it's amazing how attractive he can be.

[Malin889]

I love it when guys approach me, and they do it so infrequently because people are stuck in their phones that it’s such a breath of fresh air when they do do it. Do it!

[alphamale]

I see strong, confident men asking women out all the time

[snowcones]

I can't even read this thread anymore, it's acting really kooky and I'm having techinical difficulties.

[elaine567]

I see strong, confident men asking women out all the time

 

...and they always will.

[losangelena]

I'm confused. What is this talk of deserving to date or not deserving something?

 

If a man doesn't approach a woman he doesn't deserve to date a woman, but if he approaches a woman he deserves to date one because he's so ''courageous'' ?

 

 

 

Or then he has to impress somehow once again and in different ways, for him to ''deserve'' to date a woman?

 

 

 

And why are you just thinking about what men need to do to deserve to date a woman, and not what women should do/need to do/ to deserve to date a man?

 

 

A man wanting to feel desired and wanted and thus waiting to get approached by the girl who's sending him smoke signals is a coward?

 

 

 

Yeah, I think we're past the survival of the fittest rule.

 

 

You have a hard time reading sarcasm and irony, I see.