I'm confused about a guy I know from university

[emmagoransson]

So I've been writing to this guy that I know from university for a couple of weeks. He lives far away so we havn't met since we graduated. But after my recent breakup we have been writing almost everyday on messenger, as friends. But I'm very into him, we have lots of common interests and he has been supporting during my breakup.

 

Sometimes we write for hours and I believe we have a great connection. During all this time he hasn't mention any relationship (other than one that ended last year) and I thought it would be strange that he showed me this kind of interest if he was seing someone seriously. We have not message for a couple of days and today he mentioned (for the first time) that he has been busy because his girlfriend is at the hospital. He didn't write girlfriend though, just "current partner".

 

Now I'm very confused. Sorry for my grammar, english is my second language. Should I let it go or what to do?

Edited October 23, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Paragraphs and clarify title

[Normm]

Ask him to clarify if his partner means his girlfriend. It could be a business partner or he could be in a relationship with a man.

 

 

Odds are it's not his business partner which leaves you pretty much nowhere.

[emmagoransson]

When I asked him further about the reason for hospitalization he used the word "she" so definately a girl. I'm confused that he hasn't brought her up earlier (we have deep conversations about life). Seems very vague to use "current partner" to describe ones girlfriend .

[emmagoransson]

And WHY does he write to me for hours, sometimes until 03.00 in the night?

[Normm]

And WHY does he write to me for hours, sometimes until 03.00 in the night?

 

 

WE can only guess.

 

 

- He's bored, lonely

- Unhappy in his relationship

- The girl is his business partner

 

 

YOU can find out by asking him. During all those hours you spend writing to each other and not really talking about anything important enough such as where things might be going.

[emmagoransson]

I don't think he would spend days at the hospital for a business partner :/ . DAMN I have had a crush on him for years. I just wished that he would have mentioned his "current partner" some weeks ago so I didn't get my hopes up.

[Normm]

I just wished that he would have mentioned his "current partner" some weeks ago so I didn't get my hopes up.

 

 

I just wished you'd asked him his relationship status earlier.

[emmagoransson]

Yes me too. But in my defence, he has been writing a lot about his daily life, upbringing, living condition, ambitions, art, his breakup last summer and that he wanted to take time finding himself again etc etc. He sent me a picture of his new bed covers the other day and he keeps writing that he appreciate our conversations and that they makes him happy so I kind of figured it meant not having a "current partner"

[Normm]

It can and probably also does mean that he has no issue with "emotionally cheating" or "having questionable inappropriate extended conversations" with another girl. Doesn't bode well for him on any level if he's in a committed exclusive relationship. Think it's time to ask him. Something as simple as "so you said your partner is in the hospital, hope she's doing ok, are you guys exclusive?"

[emmagoransson]

Yeah I just wrote him (short version) that I didn't know he had a girlfriend and that I hope she is doing better etc so I'll se if he elaborates.

[Normm]

Perfect.

 

 

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