Grey40 Posted October 24, 2018 Share Posted October 24, 2018 (edited) Met a Brazilian Au Pair girl at a bar and exchanged info. We scheduled a date for a couple days later. She initially bailed on the date because of a meeting she had, then contacted me the same night and asked if I was still free to meet up, so we did. She was super into me, lots of touching, complimenting me like crazy, talking about future plans etc. I take her back to her house to drop her off—crazy makeout session in the car, she grinds on me a lot saying how great everything is etc etc. suddenly out of the blue during that she says she has to go because she has to wake up early. I say sure, kiss her goodnight and she says “text me when you get home safe”. I agree. I get home, text her “hey I’m home safe”. No response. Waited a full day and then texted her 2 Days following that date to ask her out again...she never replied or responded and even went as far as to unfollow me on social media. I’m really shocked. How does a girl go from being 100% full on into you to “0% get out of my life” Edited October 24, 2018 by Grey40 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted October 24, 2018 Share Posted October 24, 2018 Maybe she has a BF and chickened out. Link to post Share on other sites
Rocker71 Posted October 24, 2018 Share Posted October 24, 2018 (edited) Back in April I went to out to a bar I'd been to a few times before to see live bands. One night a lady friend I was hanging with in there slapped my arm and pointed to a cute red head girl standing next to her. I reached for her hand and we danced. She grabbed me and we started making out heavily. After dancing to a few songs we went to the table area to sit and chat while the band was on break. She asked to put her number into my contacts. We chatted and made out some more. Eventually she said she had to get going and said 'I'm not done with you. I want some more of you. Call me". And she left. I get back to talking with my friend and she told me the girl asked if her and I were together and that she thought I was 'adorable'. Over the next 3 weeks I called her 3 times. The last time I called her to try and set something up I left a voice msg that said it's the last time I would try to contact her and if she wants to get together she has my number. Never heard from her. Maybe she was drunk or like this girl said, she might have a SO and chickened out. It could be anything. Don't take it personally. Chances are good that you not hearing from her has nothing to do with you. Edited October 24, 2018 by Rocker71 Link to post Share on other sites
Larry56 Posted October 24, 2018 Share Posted October 24, 2018 Just assume the girl wants attention for the night. She wanted attention (for herself)...you just happened to be the guy she thought was cute/handsome enough to give her an ego boost. Don't take it too hard. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 24, 2018 Share Posted October 24, 2018 Perhaps it's the same way a guy can be 100% into you on the night and then be 100% get out of my life. If you could explain this, many women would be grateful. Anyway, she's young, foreign and in your country for a limited amount of time. Did you really expect this to lead to something? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
olivetree Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Was she drunk? When someone comes on strong at first it's usually because they don't care what you think too much - nothing to lose. Being nervous around you is a better sign that they're into you than being all over you from the start. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 sounds like she's bipolar Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grey40 Posted October 25, 2018 Author Share Posted October 25, 2018 She wasn’t drunk. I’ve heard Brazilian women are in general much more aggressive than Americans so Who knows. I tried thinking if there was anything I might have said or did when we were making out etc that could have turned her off but couldn’t think of anything. So random. In the middle of making out and talking dirty, grabbing my privates etc. she just says “m done.” Then back off for a bit and then says “I kind of want to go, I have a bunch of stuff to get done and I have to wake up early. (Which was true).” Then never heard from her and she unfollowed me on social media. Weird. I don’t think she has a BF because when we met she specifically asked me if I had a GF to make sure I was single. Link to post Share on other sites
Normm Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 grabbing my privates etc. she just says “m done.” She said "I'm done" immediately after grabbing your privates. I suspect a size issue. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grey40 Posted October 25, 2018 Author Share Posted October 25, 2018 She said "I'm done" immediately after grabbing your privates. I suspect a size issue. Lol it wasn’t directly after that, she did that briefly in the beginning, she said that after a good 10 minutes of making out and grinding. Not to mention I’ve had girls in the past do the “feel” test and have always liked my size. We were in my car and I had all this gear in my trunk (I’m in a band) and it was uncomfortable and we didn’t have a lot of space. I’m thinking that she was really looking for a one night kind of thing and when she realized it wasn’t going to happen just bailed. OR, maybe she was rjust ally into me and wanted it to be something more, and thought I was only goIng to be in it for the sex and maybe she felt like she was too forward? No idea. Link to post Share on other sites
Normm Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Try not to overthink it. She could be a total whackjob and there's no logical explanation whatsoever. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Sounds like she might not be very single and backed out when she knew it was going to go too far. It probably has nothing to do with you personally. She's a stranger to you, so it could be a hundred different things. Just take the hint that she's not interested in keeping in touch and leave it at that. Link to post Share on other sites
TheFinalWord Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Met a Brazilian Au Pair girl at a bar and exchanged info. We scheduled a date for a couple days later. She initially bailed on the date because of a meeting she had, then contacted me the same night and asked if I was still free to meet up, so we did. She was super into me, lots of touching, complimenting me like crazy, talking about future plans etc. I take her back to her house to drop her off—crazy makeout session in the car, she grinds on me a lot saying how great everything is etc etc. suddenly out of the blue during that she says she has to go because she has to wake up early. I say sure, kiss her goodnight and she says “text me when you get home safe”. I agree. I get home, text her “hey I’m home safe”. No response. Waited a full day and then texted her 2 Days following that date to ask her out again...she never replied or responded and even went as far as to unfollow me on social media. I’m really shocked. How does a girl go from being 100% full on into you to “0% get out of my life” They don't, they just hide it long enough to make a clean break, then bail. Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 At a bar and you say she wasn't drunk? How do you know? Some people don't visibly show they`re drunk. Id say she may have had a few drinks. Her inhibitions were low and then went on the spur of the moment. Its happened to me and the next day you don't hear anything except for crickets. I met this girl at a bar and we had a laugh but you don't know these people. They could just be out for a good time and not necessary looking for anything. Meeting people in real life is like meeting people online. They`re either nutters or time wasters. Just move on if you haven't heard from her. Link to post Share on other sites
Saracena Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Sounds like she might not be very single and backed out when she knew it was going to go too far. This. Most likely scenario IMO. Or an ex has come back on the scene. Link to post Share on other sites
Occitanie Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 She just wanted a fling. You gave her vibes you wanted something more serious and she bailed. Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 This is why it is important to date other women and not get too invested in one woman until she has proven worthy and you are in a committed relationship (and you still should still expect it to end at any time and therefore don’t let yourself go or get too comfortable). There are a myriad of reasons why she may have lost interest, and they don’t matter (unless it’s something you did which you don’t want to repeat with the next one). She appeared to have low interest from the get go. She initially balked at your date offer (running the risk of you rescinding), and then changed her mind last minute (when her better plans fell through). A high interest woman will make it easy to take her out and she won’t run the risk of losing you to someone else. They will be a lot more fun to date, and you won’t need to work as much. I’ve had a couple instances where women appeared to have high interest (fooling around, squirting while giving me a BJ, etc) only to have them decline an offer for a follow up date or ghost me. What’s empowering about having other options is you really don’t care if one doesn’t work out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Grey40 Posted October 25, 2018 Author Share Posted October 25, 2018 There are a myriad of reasons why she may have lost interest, and they donÂ’t matter (unless itÂ’s something you did which you donÂ’t want to repeat with the next one). She appeared to have low interest from the get go. She initially balked at your date offer (running the risk of you rescinding), and then changed her mind last minute (when her better plans fell through). A high interest woman will make it easy to take her out and she wonÂ’t run the risk of losing you to someone else. They will be a lot more fun to date, and you wonÂ’t need to work as much. WhatÂ’s empowering about having other options is you really donÂ’t care if one doesnÂ’t work out. Yeah I agree 100%. Having an abundance of options is the key to not only handling rejection but keeping yourself in a calm, un-desperate state of mind which helps immeasurably when dating. Luckily I do have a few other options so IÂ’m not beating myself up for this at all. You make a good point about her canceling and changing her mind, though upon initial canceling she did try and reschedule. Something happened when we were In the car. Something snapped in her mind and made her totally rethink things. Maybe I reminded her of an ex or of a past bad experience who knows. IÂ’ll never find out Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 25, 2018 Share Posted October 25, 2018 Some people don't visibly show they`re drunk. especially alcoholics Link to post Share on other sites
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