How many guys here literally have NO dating options?

[sabaton]

Why don't you try dating women that aren't White? Other non-Asian women exist too you know. Maybe you will have a better shot.

 

 

Fair point. There's many women from Africa, the Middle-East, South America, and from other places that are attractive, and maybe would be a better fit for OP.

[Dodgersfan11]

So, correct me if I'm wrong, but you only want to date white american women because those are the ones you are attracted to? And you refuse to date asian women (particularly those that are foreign born, b/c they aren't westernized?) What about Indian women? Or like others have said, what about non asian women, like african, latina?

[sabaton]

So, correct me if I'm wrong, but you only want to date white american women because those are the ones you are attracted to? And you refuse to date asian women (particularly those that are foreign born, b/c they aren't westernized?) What about Indian women? Or like others have said, what about non asian women, like african, latina?

 

 

He says he wants to date white American women because he was born and raised in a western Country and he's acclimated to the culture in the western world, and that he has nothing in common with Asian culture.

[HiCrunchy]

He says he wants to date white American women because he was born and raised in a western Country and he's acclimated to the culture in the western world, and that he has nothing in common with Asian culture.

 

Yes but there are women from other races that are westernized too.

I for one am westernized like OP and have never been to my parents countries. I was born and raised in the USA my entire life. I am not white and I am not Asian either.

 

I think OP just likes to date lighter skinned women and it's fine to have that preference but you can find that in other westernized non-white and non-asian women as well.

 

Maybe he will have more luck with exploring more options. Especially with Hispanic women since they tend to be shorter than ur average White female. Most women in my family are around 5"3. I'm even shorter.

 

Im just saying he should be more flexible since he is a shorter male.

Edited October 27, 2018 by HiCrunchy

[alphamale]

What about Indian women?

 

being indian myself I can tell you that most indian women date and marry indian men. there are maybe 5% - 10% who prefer white guys

[preraph]

Just about anyone can at least date as long as they date people who are their equals. A high school kid with bad acne can date a girl with bad acne, to put it simply. A less attractive guy can date a less attractive girl -- but this is ALWAYS the sticking point every post I've seen on the subject on LS. They want much better than they are and don't care at all about the girl's personality and refuse to date anyone fat or ugly, in other words, low on the desireability scale at the same level they are.

[ZA Dater]

Just about anyone can at least date as long as they date people who are their equals. A high school kid with bad acne can date a girl with bad acne, to put it simply. A less attractive guy can date a less attractive girl -- but this is ALWAYS the sticking point every post I've seen on the subject on LS. They want much better than they are and don't care at all about the girl's personality and refuse to date anyone fat or ugly, in other words, low on the desireability scale at the same level they are.

 

 

 

Oh ok so the desirability scale according to who exactly? I think an apathetic person irrespective of how physically attractive they are is unattractive, most guys don't?

 

 

Do share this universal scale with us, I would be most interested.

 

 

Strange then as a slim athletic guy the only matches I get are obese ladies so I guess this like begets like isn't so true all of the time...

[sabaton]

[Yes but there are women from other races that are westernized too.

Don't I know it. I've dated Middle-Eastern women who were born and raised in America/Europe, and they would have dated a man from their own race as much as they would date a man who isn't a part of their race, as long as that man is as westernized as they are.

 

 

 

I for one am westernized like OP and have never been to my parents countries. I was born and raised in the USA my entire life. I am not white and I am not Asian either.

Same. I'm an Ethnic Southern European/Greek/Turk born and raised in the US and I have never been to Turkey, nor do I plan to.

 

 

I think OP just likes to date lighter skinned women and it's fine to have that preference but you can find that in other westernized non-white and non-asian women as well.

Yes, I have that feeling to. I've suggested several times for him to date Indian women and Asian women and I've given him plenty of examples of very short Asian men who are popular with Asian women but he just ignored me. He probably wants a white girlfriend but the white women that he wants don't want him, because they're probably a lot better looking than him.

 

 

 

Maybe he will have more luck with exploring more options. Especially with Hispanic women since they tend to be shorter than ur average White female. Most women in my family are around 5"3. I'm even shorter.

I don't know about that. I've met Spanish women and Italian women and Portuguese women and they all seem to be on average 5'7''. I guess they're shorter in the villages and small towns of these Countries, but in the big cities they're all 5'7''+ barefoot.

 

 

 

Me, I'm 5'7'' and it doesn't really seem to bother these girls, although there's plenty of 5'9''+ tourists around.

 

 

Im just saying he should be more flexible since he is a shorter male.

 

 

He does seem to have very high standards for someone who is desperate to get a girlfriend.

[sabaton]

Oh ok so the desirability scale according to who exactly? I think an apathetic person irrespective of how physically attractive they are is unattractive, most guys don't?

 

 

Do share this universal scale with us, I would be most interested.

 

 

Strange then as a slim athletic guy the only matches I get are obese ladies so I guess this like begets like isn't so true all of the time...

 

 

 

 

Ok, human beings are born with an innate ability to figure out their own level of attractiveness.

 

 

 

It's an evolutionary mechanism that allows people to not lose time pursuing people who are way out of their league, and to instead focus on the women and men who are interested in sticking around after sex, because they are genuinely attracted to them, physically, and they like the person they slept with.

 

 

I have male models as friends of mine who'll sleep with women who are not attractive, when they want easy sex, quick sex, and I have female friends who are also fashion models who'll sleep with men who don't share the same level of aesthetics, either because they're horny and the guy was around and he's not a jerk, girls tell around that he's sexually attentive, or that he's not the bragging type and the girl won't get the slut brand for sleeping with him.

 

 

People lower their standards all the time for one reason or another, and sometimes people with very different levels of aesthetics end up together in a genuine relationship because they love each other.

 

 

BUT.

 

 

For the most part. People date and marry and have kids within their own league. Do you want to have a girlfriend who is a fashion model and then worry about all of the guys who look like they're the sons of Senators with their preppy good-looks and money chasing after your girl all the time?

 

 

 

 

think an apathetic person irrespective of how physically attractive they are is unattractive, most guys don't?

 

 

 

 

I don't understand what you're trying to say. A person who is passive and doesn't pursue what she wants is unattractive regardless of how physically attractive that person is? Is that what you mean?

 

 

most guys don't what?

 

 

Do share this universal scale with us, I would be most interested.

 

 

Overweight man = equal in attractiveness to an overweight woman.

Average man(not overweight) = the same as a girl who isn't overweight, but who ain't pretty.

 

 

Above average man = Same as a girl who is thin and kinda cute.

 

 

Attractive man = He can get girls who turn some heads, some lowkey models.

 

 

 

Very attractive man = he hooks up and dates girls that most guys would consider to be hot.

 

 

Hot man = he makes money off his looks.

 

 

Henry Cavill = he's the guy I'd give 20 years of my life expectancy to have his aesthetics

[HiCrunchy]

Don't I know it. I've dated Middle-Eastern women who were born and raised in America/Europe, and they would have dated a man from their own race as much as they would date a man who isn't a part of their race, as long as that man is as westernized as they are.

 

 

 

 

Same. I'm an Ethnic Southern European/Greek/Turk born and raised in the US and I have never been to Turkey, nor do I plan to.

 

 

 

Yes, I have that feeling to. I've suggested several times for him to date Indian women and Asian women and I've given him plenty of examples of very short Asian men who are popular with Asian women but he just ignored me. He probably wants a white girlfriend but the white women that he wants don't want him, because they're probably a lot better looking than him.

 

 

 

 

I don't know about that. I've met Spanish women and Italian women and Portuguese women and they all seem to be on average 5'7''. I guess they're shorter in the villages and small towns of these Countries, but in the big cities they're all 5'7''+ barefoot.

 

 

 

Me, I'm 5'7'' and it doesn't really seem to bother these girls, although there's plenty of 5'9''+ tourists around.

 

 

 

 

 

He does seem to have very high standards for someone who is desperate to get a girlfriend.

 

These women you mentioned tend to be taller since they are European. Spain, Italy, and Portugal are right next to the UK. As in, they tend to be as tall.

 

If you think of women from Latin America, the Caribbean, and Mexico, they are all much shorter than 5"7. I'd say the average woman is closer to 5"3 -5"4.

 

Op should try and aim for women like that because they are

A: these women are used to dating men a little shorter than your average white guy

B: are shorter than him and will be more willing to date someone of his height.

 

But he will still have to stop with the desperate vibe and insecurity. These women come from cultures where being a more masculine and confident man is very attractive. OP isn't showing these traits right at the moment.

[ZA Dater]

Ok, human beings are born with an innate ability to figure out their own level of attractiveness.

 

 

 

It's an evolutionary mechanism that allows people to not lose time pursuing people who are way out of their league, and to instead focus on the women and men who are interested in sticking around after sex, because they are genuinely attracted to them, physically, and they like the person they slept with.

 

 

I have male models as friends of mine who'll sleep with women who are not attractive, when they want easy sex, quick sex, and I have female friends who are also fashion models who'll sleep with men who don't share the same level of aesthetics, either because they're horny and the guy was around and he's not a jerk, girls tell around that he's sexually attentive, or that he's not the bragging type and the girl won't get the slut brand for sleeping with him.

 

 

People lower their standards all the time for one reason or another, and sometimes people with very different levels of aesthetics end up together in a genuine relationship because they love each other.

 

 

BUT.

 

 

For the most part. People date and marry and have kids within their own league. Do you want to have a girlfriend who is a fashion model and then worry about all of the guys who look like they're the sons of Senators with their preppy good-looks and money chasing after your girl all the time?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I don't understand what you're trying to say. A person who is passive and doesn't pursue what she wants is unattractive regardless of how physically attractive that person is? Is that what you mean?

 

 

most guys don't what?

 

 

 

 

 

Overweight man = equal in attractiveness to an overweight woman.

Average man(not overweight) = the same as a girl who isn't overweight, but who ain't pretty.

 

 

Above average man = Same as a girl who is thin and kinda cute.

 

 

Attractive man = He can get girls who turn some heads, some lowkey models.

 

 

 

Very attractive man = he hooks up and dates girls that most guys would consider to be hot.

 

 

Hot man = he makes money off his looks.

 

 

Henry Cavill = he's the guy I'd give 20 years of my life expectancy to have his aesthetics

 

 

 

Enlightening thank you.

 

 

I don't really agree but perhaps because that's because I have been able to date what I want whereas everyone I know has been able to. Like the title suggests I don't have any dating options and in terms of the dating market the fact I an unconventional makes me perceived value as being even lower.

 

 

Unfortunately in whatever I do I want what I want in that, I'd rather try do something really difficult than settle for something really easy. But yes I get what you say and perhaps there is a touch of truth to it, I wont ever reconcile that though, I'd rather try and fail at getting what I want than accept anything less than what I want.

 

 

Perhaps I even agree slightly, I don't bother with people I know aren't single and by an large pretty people aren't ever single, in fact I haven't met one single person all year. Not one.

 

 

Ultimately if I have to go down the fake economic method of dating to get what I want then so be it but the idea of going to anything with miss average has less appeal than going on my own.

 

 

When you have had a great date with what you do like you simply cannot accept less than that ever. I'd rather date vicariously than have average.

 

 

Nobody I want is into me anyway so if I chase an unlikely idea I am least chasing something rather than being miserable doing nothing.

 

 

But most who don't have options, do they do much to create options? My guess is not, its Sat night and I am sitting at home on my own working, why because I have no friends really and I don't club or drink. So yes my lack of options is a result of me not fitting with what society deems normal. My guess is this applies to most who don't have options.

[sabaton]

These women you mentioned tend to be taller since they are European. Spain, Italy, and Portugal are right next to the UK. As in, they tend to be as tall.

 

 

Sure, but women and men are usually 5 to 6 inches apart in height, with the men getting taller than the women once they reach their adolescent years.

 

 

 

The adult women are 5'7'' or above that, but the men are only 5'8'' for those who are 30 years old + and 5'9'' for the young men 18-25 from what I see when I walk past the local high school/University to get to work.

 

 

 

That's a 1 to 2 inches in height difference, barefoot. With heels the women are several inches taller than the men. I very rarely see couples in Southern Europe where the guy is significately taller than girl he's with.

 

 

 

I feel that's why tall girls(5'10''+) never really minded that I'm way shorter than them. Guys their own height or taller are rare, and just because a guy is tall that doesn't mean she's going to automatically be attracted to him.

 

 

I also met a lot of Italian men and women and they also shared the same height more or less.

 

 

 

The only significant height difference that I witnessed in Europe - so far - that I used to see back home was from the Germans, with the girls being 5'6'' and the guys being 5'11'' but I saw attractive German girls hook-up with the local men who were much shorter than the men they are used to back home all the time.

 

 

 

If you think of women from Latin America, the Caribbean, and Mexico, they are all much shorter than 5"7. I'd say the average woman is closer to 5"3 -5"4.

 

 

I dunno. It's probably common for the women who live in the most important cities of their nations to be taller than the rest of the women. I met a lot of Brazilian women(Brazilian men stand on average at 5'7'') who were 5'7'' or above that, but I met those women in São Paulo and Rio De Janeiro. The women in Santa Catarina are probably 4 inches shorter for all I know.

 

 

Op should try and aim for women like that because they are

A: these women are used to dating men a little shorter than your average white guy

B: are shorter than him and will be more willing to date someone of his height.

 

 

 

 

Yes, he should. Women who are used to men being shorter aren't going to be concerned about the OP's height because he's considered average in their own culture. And even if the girl is tall - it's not like she's gonna hold out for a tall guy if he ticks off all of her other requirements(funny, interesting, charming etc)

 

 

But he will still have to stop with the desperate vibe and insecurity. These women come from cultures where being a more masculine and confident man is very attractive. OP isn't showing these traits right at the moment.

 

 

hahaha, yes. What makes these girls attracted to a guy, as long as he fits the minimum physical requirements - which aren't all that high - is confidence and showing that he wants them.

 

 

They truthfully love male attention.

[sabaton]

But most who don't have options, do they do much to create options? My guess is not, its Sat night and I am sitting at home on my own working, why because I have no friends really and I don't club or drink. So yes my lack of options is a result of me not fitting with what society deems normal. My guess is this applies to most who don't have options.

Listen, even shy women love extroverted men. It's just how it is. No one wants a guy who is depressed, has low self-esteem, and doesn't feel like he's worth much. Not even women who suffer from those psychological afflictions want men like that.

 

 

You can moan and bemoan that it's unfair that women can pick and choose but hey man, they carry a baby for 9 months inside of them and they have 5 times less our body strength and they have a really hard time, doesn't matter if they live in Pakistan or in Los Angeles - life as a woman ain't easy at all.

 

 

So make them laugh. Make them giggle. Make them blush. Get out of your shell. Girls aren't scary. They're just people, like you and me. They have their insecurities, their problems, their uncertainties and everytime you feel like you aren't good enough - just think of the Elephant man.

 

Now that guy had it bad.

 

I'm not Ryan Gosling. I'm not a young Harrison Ford and I shall never be the man that I've always wanted to be .Erroll Flynn. But so what?! 3.5 billion women. There will always be women who think I'm cute. They might need some thick eye-glasses tho.

 

 

Get female friends. Befriend women who have female friends who are single.

[ZA Dater]

Listen, even shy women love extroverted men. It's just how it is. No one wants a guy who is depressed, has low self-esteem, and doesn't feel like he's worth much. Not even women who suffer from those psychological afflictions want men like that.

 

 

You can moan and bemoan that it's unfair that women can pick and choose but hey man, they carry a baby for 9 months inside of them and they have 5 times less our body strength and they have a really hard time, doesn't matter if they live in Pakistan or in Los Angeles - life as a woman ain't easy at all.

 

 

So make them laugh. Make them giggle. Make them blush. Get out of your shell. Girls aren't scary. They're just people, like you and me. They have their insecurities, their problems, their uncertainties and everytime you feel like you aren't good enough - just think of the Elephant man.

 

Now that guy had it bad.

 

I'm not Ryan Gosling. I'm not a young Harrison Ford and I shall never be the man that I've always wanted to be .Erroll Flynn. But so what?! 3.5 billion women. There will always be women who think I'm cute. They might need some thick eye-glasses tho.

 

 

Get female friends. Befriend women who have female friends who are single.

 

I often think about this "if she is so fantastic, why is she single" think about that for a minute and it applies to guys too.

 

I am far to in fun to befriend anyone.

[sabaton]

I often think about this "if she is so fantastic, why is she single" think about that for a minute and it applies to guys too.

 

I am far to in fun to befriend anyone.

 

 

hahaha, she's single because most men are intimidated by a beautiful woman. They think that a girl that pleasing to the eye can't be single, that she has to have a boyfriend, and that her boyfriend has to look like Piqué

 

 

https://www.popticular.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/pique311.jpg

 

 

for her to date him, or that he must be rich.

 

 

But in many cases, probably most, depending on how gorgeous she is, she's single and open to dating the guy who has the courage to approach her and be charming about it. Women don't want cocky, arrogant jerks assailing them, bro.

 

 

I knew girls in college who were extremely attractive and rich, and they ended up dating some 5'5'' 110lbs soaking wet kid because he had the stones to talk to these girls.

[Chilli]

lt doesn't matter who tends to be shorter all taller there's always shorter people or women around anywhere in any race.

[sabaton]

lt doesn't matter who tends to be shorter all taller there's always shorter people or women around anywhere in any race.

 

 

Yes. Short stature in a man is not going to spell doom to his dating life. I had a female classmate whose mother was 6 feet tall and her dad was 5'8''. And I met lots of girls that didn't care about a guy's height. There's a lot more to a man attractiveness than just his height.

[preraph]

Oh ok so the desirability scale according to who exactly? I think an apathetic person irrespective of how physically attractive they are is unattractive, most guys don't?

 

 

Do share this universal scale with us, I would be most interested.

 

 

Strange then as a slim athletic guy the only matches I get are obese ladies so I guess this like begets like isn't so true all of the time...

 

I guess it is. It may not be you're fat. But there's something that's equally unattractive to them as fat ladies are to you, or that wouldn't be who's matching with you.

[HiCrunchy]

Yes. Short stature in a man is not going to spell doom to his dating life. I had a female classmate whose mother was 6 feet tall and her dad was 5'8''. And I met lots of girls that didn't care about a guy's height. There's a lot more to a man attractiveness than just his height.

 

Hmm maybe he should try dating really tall girls. They are used to being the tall one in the relationship and probably wont mind op height as much.

[sabaton]

Hmm maybe he should try dating really tall girls. They are used to being the tall one in the relationship and probably wont mind op height as much.

 

 

That's a good suggestion.

[Mysterio]

Here's how it works for most people. One person drops into the others life. Dazzle's them with charm and wit. They take it from there. Thats how it works.

 

Rarely is love methodical and logical. My friend JC is 10 yrs younger than me. We get together 4 times a yr. So why are we not together.

 

She is not physically attracted to me. I am not attracted to her personality as anymore than a friend. Although I think she is very pretty.

 

At this stage of my life. I might as well be with someone who really wants me.

 

Another thing that I might as well add. We are very complicated as people ourselves. I could I want a woman to be like this and that. If she has the looks. She may not have the personality. If she has the personality. She may not have the looks.

 

On both sides of the relationship. Looks and Personality and Personal circumstances have to be more in synch with each other.

 

For me. I love a woman that is soft. The harder she is. The more I don't find myself attracted to her. So what can one do. Live your life. Consider a love match an addition to your life. Not something that is missing. Its hard in a world where being single is viewed at as something lacking. Equally having a relationship is having it made?

 

Anyways. I wonder if we put no effort into a romantic relationship. If all would go well.

[Mysterio]

Another thing. All my guy friends in my life. The ones that are coupled. Its the women that are the driving force behind it all for the most part.

 

Its not like my male friends were super gung ho about getting their wives etc. Maybe we all think way too much about it at times. I know I do.

 

I seem to get romantic attention when I don't care and am not making an effort with it. Maybe the answer to all our romantic woes is to be happy with something and not make that effort with women. They see us happy by doing things we want to do. Add to that not making any type of romantic overtures to them and that makes them hot for us.

[Chilli]

Here's how it works for most people. One person drops into the others life. Dazzle's them with charm and wit. They take it from there. Thats how it works.

 

Rarely is love methodical and logical. My friend JC is 10 yrs younger than me. We get together 4 times a yr. So why are we not together.

 

She is not physically attracted to me. I am not attracted to her personality as anymore than a friend. Although I think she is very pretty.

 

At this stage of my life. I might as well be with someone who really wants me.

 

Another thing that I might as well add. We are very complicated as people ourselves. I could I want a woman to be like this and that. If she has the looks. She may not have the personality. If she has the personality. She may not have the looks.

 

On both sides of the relationship. Looks and Personality and Personal circumstances have to be more in synch with each other.

 

For me. I love a woman that is soft. The harder she is. The more I don't find myself attracted to her. So what can one do. Live your life. Consider a love match an addition to your life. Not something that is missing. Its hard in a world where being single is viewed at as something lacking. Equally having a relationship is having it made?

 

Anyways. I wonder if we put no effort into a romantic relationship. If all would go well.

 

 

lt's never really been like that for me.

l'm a talker , but only with certain people and only when l'm in the mood.

l like to get into the heart and soul , blood and guts, all of it, with my woman.

lt's about our connection for me and the deeper the better and she'd feel the same.

But nope , no ones ever fallen into my lap apart from a few drunk chicks back in my partying days,but about it

But l have just somehow tripped over her and when l've literally had no life too oddly enough.

 

ps , and yep , over thinking and picking it to bits, is never a good thing with anything.

Edited October 28, 2018 by Chilli

[Dodgersfan11]

What's wrong with the OP that he is against dating Asian girls that are born overseas but come here to study, live, etc etc? Something about not being "westernized" I really don't think there is such a thing. I get that he was born here, but for him to say that he refuses to date an asian girl that is fresh off the boat is absurd. What, he doesn't know anything about Asian? Does he hate his culture, his ethnicity or something? You mean to say that you have never traveled to Asian and seen attractive asian women? Surely, there are attractive ones, what, so the entire female population of asian countries want to ONLY date/marry white men? Like others of said, seems like he only wants the hot blonde, blue eyed, big boobies type girl that is out of his league. If you have a good job, maybe you can travel to Spain, Europe, Middle east, meet a foreigner over there, I doubt they will be less picky about men.

 

If he's this frustrated about women, then maybe he could go to a brothel in Nevada or fly to Amsterdam and spend some money on those women, at least for some sex and championship!

Edited October 28, 2018 by Dodgersfan11

[Chilli]

Asian women are imo the second most beautiful women in the world , hell if l was Asian l sure wouldn't be complaining.

And they're often tiny too so you shouldn't have a drama at all.

 

Where my daughter and l often have lunch tourist buses come in, 100s of Asians and people from all over the world wondering about from the buses.

And we often watch all the tourists but the Asian couples not all but so many, we see 1000's of them, often seem really really special and close, depth , far more so than most of the other nationalities .

We often talk about how cool and special, close, they often are.

 

So l dunno , bit too much generalizing , think your closing the door on yourself.