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How far would you go?


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Quick bio; I'm in the process of getting divorced after 20+ years so nothing is going to happen until that's done. The person below is 1/2 my age so there's that. I'm more interested in knowing how far is too far to meet someone.

 

Female friend of a female friend and I hit it off at a bar one night. We happen to have a few things in common. Talked alone for a couple hours (I realized later, that was not by accident), walked with her 6 blocks to our cars, she initiated a hug and we left. During our talk she mentioned our mutual friend and her boyfriend and her were traveling long distance to a festival and she suggested I go. It would have meant I would have to buy a $250 round trip ticket and crash my friends hotel room.

 

My spider senses said she's the 3rd wheel and needed a 4th. And I just don't invite myself to someone else's get away so I didn't go. Mutual friend said she asked where I was and was expecting me to be there. Kind of a big assumption after one night.

 

I guess dating logic is if someone invites you to an event, that means they're interested. But how far is too far?

 

Thanks

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If I were you, I'd make this decision based on how interested I was in the festival. If it looked like a great festival and you were looking forward to hanging out with your mate and *maybe* getting to better know a woman you're interested in, then I'd do it.

 

If you'd rather stick pins in your eyes than attend the festival, or if the budget won't stretch that far, then politely declining is the best response.

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If she didn't ask you directly, but just threw out a suggestion, you were under no obligation to go. $250 is a lot to spend to hang out with someone you just met. Her expecting you to be there shows immaturity.

 

You mentioned an age difference. I'm going to guess you're in your 40's and she's in her 20's. Am I close?

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If I were you, I'd make this decision based on how interested I was in the festival. If it looked like a great festival and you were looking forward to hanging out with your mate and *maybe* getting to better know a woman you're interested in, then I'd do it.

 

If you'd rather stick pins in your eyes than attend the festival, or if the budget won't stretch that far, then politely declining is the best response.

 

I read it as the event has already passed, and the girl was disappointed he wasn't there.

 

Stick pins in your eyes, lol!

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Thanks all.

 

alphamale I know how to get in touch with her. It would be nice if it was platonic because I'm getting off easy on the alimony proposal and i don't want to screw the pooch on that until it's final.

 

basil67 I'm a musician so I appreciate all kinds of music but I probably wouldn't travel 600 miles for this festival alone. I would to hang with some friends that I knew well but I don't really know our mutual friend that well and I just met her for the first time that night. Kind of borderline I guess.

 

MidwestUSA I'm 53, she's 26. Whoa, that's more than twice. And yeah, pins stuck.

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I don't see this as anything romantic, but more of a friend zone type thing. Some girls just like the emotional connection and that's all the want.

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A man is his won enemy, his won limitation. His has conditioning limits him. reclaim you masculinity....you are the reason that women become wild when they meet men like me...there is hunger for real man.

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On things like this, follow your gut. If you want to go (for whatever reason) and it doesn't present a hardship in someway for you then do it.

 

Once you are divorced you are a free man to do as you please. Nothing wrong with hanging out with/dating someone half your age as long as you both are on the same page about intentions.

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I don't see this as anything romantic, but more of a friend zone type thing. Some girls just like the emotional connection and that's all the want.

 

I agree. If she really wanted something, she would have cleared it with her friend about the room (they have known each other a lot longer than I've known either of them). Cheers

 

On things like this, follow your gut. If you want to go (for whatever reason) and it doesn't present a hardship in someway for you then do it.

 

Once you are divorced you are a free man to do as you please. Nothing wrong with hanging out with/dating someone half your age as long as you both are on the same page about intentions.

 

Thanks. Great advice.

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MidwestUSA I'm 53, she's 26. Whoa, that's more than twice.

 

Coming out of a divorce from a 20-yr marriage, the LAST thing I'd want would be the stress of trying to navigate any type of relationship with a 26-yr old, friendship included...

 

Mr. Lucky

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