Jaymz123 Posted November 6, 2018 Share Posted November 6, 2018 (edited) Okay first of all thank you all in advance for reading what im about to say and thank you even more for helping out. Short story: My gf broke up with me a few days ago for the second time, even though she loves me, for , what looks like to me , same reasons. She has troubles with settling her life and our relationship is another trouble cause we are in different countries and it's hard for us to move in together. Is there hope for us and what should i do? Should i stop contacting her or try to reason with her since i know that she still loves me? Detailed story: We live in two different countries and the back story goes something like this : We met a bit more than a year ago fell in love like crazy and after a few months we decided to move in together (She moved to the country where i currently live). The story didn't go exactly as planned , she didn't like the country that much (neither do i) and so she decided to move back. After she moved back a few days passed and we broke up because she was stressed about the whole new change (trust me this is important in the later text), finding a new job back home, finding a new flat which all seemed easy for her before she decided to go back. After the first break up i decided not to contact her at all to what she responded by calling back , trying to let me know that she wants to get back together. And we of course did. we had a wonderful couple of months in which we fell in love even more , we were trying to find ways for me to move there and so on and it was all ok until we found out that it is very hard for me to find a job and stay there and now again , the whole frustration about me not being able to come so easily , trouble with her job there and a life different from what she was used to made her break up with me again telling me that she is gonna go crazy from all the worrying and that she needs to stop. So im wondering is there still a chance for us to be together again and are these just impulses of a big pressure on her that make her break up with me ? I can tell that she is not lying that she loves me, she even became more dedicated in sex, we spoke about everything and i tried convincing her not to leave all we had but she said that she has to do it. Should i still try not contacting her at all or should i try to reason with her? Thank you for reading this long ass post, i hope you'll help me out. If you have any questions regarding the situation i'll gladly answer. Edited November 6, 2018 by Jaymz123 Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 Women who love you, don’t break up with you. If you still think there is a chance you will just prolong your suffering longer. Trust me, I speak from experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 My gf broke up with me a few days ago for the second time, even though she loves me, for , what looks like to me , same reasons. She has troubles with settling her life and our relationship is another trouble cause we are in different countries and it's hard for us to move in together. Is there hope for us and what should i do? Should i stop contacting her or try to reason with her since i know that she still loves me. that's twice. Obviously she doesn't love you enough. She's trying to make it easy on you. You are for some reason trying to keep yourself in this. Why? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaymz123 Posted November 7, 2018 Author Share Posted November 7, 2018 Well the reason i believe she still loves me is because she wanted to get married to me. Long story short , the only way that i could move to her country is if we get married and she kinda asked me to but i said that im not really ready for that. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 It's over, my friend. She has ended it twice, for very valid reasons. It's time to concede that this isn't working for her and she didn't end it impulsively. She has thought about this and knows it's not for her. I'm sorry; I know it hurts. But you don't want the same things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaymz123 Posted November 7, 2018 Author Share Posted November 7, 2018 Im not gonna contact her but what if she tells me that she wants to get back together ? Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 Im not gonna contact her but what if she tells me that she wants to get back together ? Cross that bridge if you come to it. Right now, It's not worth worrying about something that might never happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaymz123 Posted November 7, 2018 Author Share Posted November 7, 2018 Cross that bridge if you come to it. Right now, It's not worth worrying about something that might never happen. It has happened before and the previous breakup seemed far more serious than this one. I know im kinda beating a dead horse but i dont know if i should consider it as an option if it happens. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jaymz123 Posted November 7, 2018 Author Share Posted November 7, 2018 Btw last time i spoke to her i've sent her some youtube video on breaking up , like how and when it should happen and she said "i didn't leave you"... Beats me what that meant. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 LTR's never work. Let this go. There is no such thing as "the only one". Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 She's in love with the idea of love & romance. It seemed oh so glamorous to move to another country to be with her SO but the reality wasn't all the fairytale is cracked up to be. Unfortunately she sold this fairy tale to you as reality. She only thinks she loves you. She loves the idea, not you the person. There are too many insurmountable immigration issues to deal with here. Let her go & date somebody local. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted November 7, 2018 Share Posted November 7, 2018 Well the reason i believe she still loves me is because she wanted to get married to me. Long story short , the only way that i could move to her country is if we get married and she kinda asked me to but i said that im not really ready for that. You turned down her marriage proposal, there is usually no coming back from that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted November 8, 2018 Share Posted November 8, 2018 You live in two different countries. It would be a huge commitment to relocate for either of you. She might very well love you, just not enough to relocate. Link to post Share on other sites
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