Lagoon1212 Posted November 9, 2018 Share Posted November 9, 2018 This might be a stupid question but i just learned something and felt so hurt. I recently graduated from college, but while in school I found a flexible but low paying job to cover some of the expenses. I recently graduated with Bachlors degree in 3 years and magna cum laude, and I am just starting to look for a new job with my degree. My plan is to eventually get a masters or doctorate degree in my field. I know degree doesn't equal intelligence but just giving you some background info. I always thought my boss was super smart (I don't really see him often though). Today, my manager made a joke and told the boss that I have decided not to leave the company, but go back to school and get my masters while still working for them. Of course this was not true, he was just joking. My boss replied: "she is dumber than I thought." He had no idea i was there. For some reason this really hurt me. I understand that part of the message is that if I chose to work this low paying job (instead to work in my field and get the experience I need for Masters), it would be really dumb. But somehow, what he said felt more than that. it felt like he already thought I was dumb. Am I overreacting? Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted November 9, 2018 Share Posted November 9, 2018 Why wouldn't you leave now for any higher paying job? OR ask them to pay you what you're worth? Link to post Share on other sites
Rockdad Posted November 9, 2018 Share Posted November 9, 2018 That's exactly how I would feel hearing a remark like that directed about me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lagoon1212 Posted November 9, 2018 Author Share Posted November 9, 2018 Why wouldn't you leave now for any higher paying job? OR ask them to pay you what you're worth? I just got my license and started applying for jobs. I don't think I can ask for more because it is a receptionist position and every company pays around the same. However, I got that job because I was a student with no degree. And again, i just got a degree but it will take at least a month before I get a real job. Link to post Share on other sites
mrs rubble Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 I have been in the same position, I was told I couldn't do something new at work because "I just didn't have the knowledge." I was pretty hurt by that, and spoke about it with some of my colleagues they all reassured me that I was perfectly capable of doing anything, and not at all stupid. This woman has since retired and left, she was from a generation of people in my industry who liked to put others down for having different training than them. The boss is probably bitter that you are going to leave. Well done on your degree and good luck with the job hunting. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lagoon1212 Posted November 10, 2018 Author Share Posted November 10, 2018 I have been in the same position, I was told I couldn't do something new at work because "I just didn't have the knowledge." I was pretty hurt by that, and spoke about it with some of my colleagues they all reassured me that I was perfectly capable of doing anything, and not at all stupid. This woman has since retired and left, she was from a generation of people in my industry who liked to put others down for having different training than them. The boss is probably bitter that you are going to leave. Well done on your degree and good luck with the job hunting. Thank you so very much. I guess he is bitter. Also, he probably thinks because his son is being sent to the world's most elite colleges (thanks to his dad's money) means that his kid is the smartest in the world. I was thinking of saying something but no. I just got so disappointed and I guess got a reality check on how most owners of the companies really perceive their employees. Link to post Share on other sites
Marc878 Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 He may have thought you had a lot more potential than wasting it in your current position. I doubt he meant it like you took it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
S2B Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 I just got my license and started applying for jobs. I don't think I can ask for more because it is a receptionist position and every company pays around the same. However, I got that job because I was a student with no degree. And again, i just got a degree but it will take at least a month before I get a real job. Not that the job you have now isn't a real job... But give yourself a pat on the back! Know that you can now earn more money at a different job - and go for it! It doesn't matter that it takes a month or three months - make the move when it serves you well. You may as well be earning more while you're working! Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 He may have thought you had a lot more potential than wasting it in your current position. I doubt he meant it like you took it. Agreed. OP, it was a poorly worded compliment, neither the first nor the last you’ll encounter... Mr. Lucky 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Lagoon1212 Posted November 10, 2018 Author Share Posted November 10, 2018 Not that the job you have now isn't a real job... But give yourself a pat on the back! Know that you can now earn more money at a different job - and go for it! It doesn't matter that it takes a month or three months - make the move when it serves you well. You may as well be earning more while you're working! Yes, I didn't mean that a receptionist position is not a real job, just I work there when i am free. 2-3 days a week (sometimes i skip the entire week, for example when I had finals). I will continue working there until I find another job (my student debt is through the roof). But, it just made me feel really bad. I used to stay at work till 1 in the morning sometimes (to answer phone calls) and then i would have my exams at 7am the same morning. Maybe he didn't mean it that was, as some of you said but it certainly felt like we thinks very little of his employees (or maybe just about me). Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 Sounds like your boss is jealous that you are thinking of studying further. Yes it is insulting but I suspect he is afraid is losing you and you achieving means he loses control of you. You’ve done well and should be proud of yourself. Recognise his fear of loss of control for what it is. It is no reflection on you, only of his insecurities. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 If he said "wow she is dumb!" rather than "dumber than I thought" I could shrug that off. But no its not cool. Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted November 10, 2018 Share Posted November 10, 2018 Also, he probably thinks because his son is being sent to the world's most elite colleges (thanks to his dad's money) means that his kid is the smartest in the world. People who boast to this extent tend to get very insecure and jealous of anyone else's success. They ignore your achievement or say to themselves, to you, to others.. Things to try to bring you down so they can feel superior. Onwards and upwards. Link to post Share on other sites
Springsummer Posted November 11, 2018 Share Posted November 11, 2018 I've experienced similar insults. one is as recently as just few days ago.This one lady is not exactly my boss. she is just level above me and give me stuff to do, because I am new. so, I just looked at the screen while listening to music on my earphone. She told me "don't sit around". WTH?! I am an IT professional not a clerk or manual labour. As long as I finished my tasks on the job, what the hell is the business of yours? I work for the government. that's it. I am quitting, at least with this team. (I am the second longest serving member of the team even I just started the beginning of this year) she will be the only one left after her starting in the team 15 years ago. Guess, no one can stand working with her. Link to post Share on other sites
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