smackie9 Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 He doesn't like your dog...D E A L B R E A K E R. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 (edited) As far as I can tell, just for being a dog (drooling, shedding, requiring attention, digs in the backyard ect. Though my dog doesn't actually shed and drool that much compared to other dogs.) He has mentioned being worried because of the kids but since then we have introduced the kids to the dog and even he agreed it went better than expected. She gets a bit over excited when people come in and gets a bit jumpy. She has not jumped on kids though (not just his kids but cousins' etc. We do keep a close watch on her around the kids and I kept her leashed the first 5 minutes his 2 year old came in but she seems to be less excitable around smaller humans in general) <snip> I texted him good night last night and still haven't heard from him so I supposed I'm officially being ghosted. As far as I'm concerned we're done. So the bf who smokes and has 2 kids, one of whom is a 2yo, thinks your dog is what makes the house dirty or will cause a problem for weekends away? Hypocrisy much? Edited November 19, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Truncate quote 4 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 Get rid of him. He will end up harming your dog when you aren't around. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 Look, you can't keep the guy because you can't trust him alone with your dog. There was a guy one street over a few years ago. I kept returning this german shepherd to their duplex. The guy was never happy about it. Finally I caught the woman coming home and told her her dog was always out and the guy who lived there never seemed happy when I returned it. She said he doesn't like the dog. He was letting the dog out trying to get rid of it. But I and others kept returning it. If a person can't love a dog - they can't love anybody! Dogs are the easiest creatures to get along with. Your bf has no tolerance whatever and he has no empathy for you and doesn't care that YOU LOVE this dog. Your bf is a jerk. Your dog is an angel. Don't EVER give up a pet for a man!! You will never be able to trust this guy with your dog. He will always be angling to get rid of it. He may even hurt it and abuse it. Right now he's abusing you by hating something you LOVE and it doesn't speak well to his character. ^^^totally co-sign Completely true--no lie here 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Zapbasket Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 If he really cared about YOU, even if he categorically hated dogs he'd strain his furthest to accommodate to this one dog because of his feelings for YOU. Imagine that person posting on here: "I have the most amazing girlfriend. I love her so much and want to spend the rest of my life with her. The problem is that she has a dog, and while she bends over backwards to train it, I just can't stand the dog. I'd never ask her to part with it on my account, but as much as it breaks my heart I think I'm going to have to part with HER on account of the dog. Is there any other recourse?" Your bf is NOT asking that question. He's NOT trying. Which makes me think it's not really the dog he's not thrilled with, but you. The dog is just a proxy and for some reason he doesn't want to admit to himself all the ways he's ambivalent about you, and your relationship. I know it hurts to consider this but someone that rigid about a pet you love that doesn't sound like some offspring of Cujo or something, doesn't sound like a very good person. Either that or you two are just wildly incompatible and it's bringing out his worst. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 It’s not the dog, it’s the fact that he was your dog with your ex and he’s jealous about that. What he’s doing is very controlling and ugly. Isolation much? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs._December Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 My boyfriend left my place super upset earlier this week because he was trying to do yoga and she was bothering him. Gosh, I hope he didn't get his man bun into too much of an uproar when his yoga was interrupted. Just an aside here, but maybe you want to look for a ... how do I say.. a manlier man next time? I'll be honest. You've been with this clown for only 4 months. Are you honestly going to let him continue making you feel BAD because your dog is acting like a dog? Are you going to continue pandering to him, to the point where you're constantly compromising your dog's freedom around your own house and apologizing for everything your dog does like you're in the wrong and man-bun is in the right????? He's a freakin' guest in your home! Does he pay rent? Does he have furniture there? Does his mail come there? Why on earth are you bending over backwards to pander to some fool who doesn't even LIVE there? But guess who does live there? Your dog! I'd be sending Yoga Boy packing without a backward glance. Never, EVER compromise your life or parts of your life for a douche bag. 6 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 It’s not the dog, it’s the fact that he was your dog with your ex and he’s jealous about that. What he’s doing is very controlling and ugly. Isolation much? Agreed. //////////////////////// 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 I would like to hear more about the dog bowl/feeding puzzle things you use. I think my dog would like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs._December Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 I texted him good night last night and still haven't heard from him so I supposed I'm officially being ghosted. As far as I'm concerned we're done. He did you a favor that for some odd reason, you refused to do for YOURSELF. If you're lucky, he'll continue to ghost you. Let him find someone else to deal with him and his part-time kids. Guess what? Long after this POS is gone, guess who'll STILL be right there, devoted and loyal to you as always? The one you kept making excuses for and apologizing for and allowing to be locked in your bedroom, that's who. Learn from this. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 It’s not the dog, it’s the fact that he was your dog with your ex and he’s jealous about that. What he’s doing is very controlling and ugly. Isolation much? I agree that he sounds very controlling. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
introverted1 Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 I would like to hear more about the dog bowl/feeding puzzle things you use. I think my dog would like that. Check out "Naughty But Nice (for dog owners)" on Facebook. They talk a lot about how to use food and mental stimulation (and other techniques) to improve dog behavior. They also have a bunch of training videos that are helpful. My dog just stared resolutely at the feeding puzzle (and i bought the beginner one), but it seems to work for most dogs! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 Check out "Naughty But Nice (for dog owners)" on Facebook. They talk a lot about how to use food and mental stimulation (and other techniques) to improve dog behavior. They also have a bunch of training videos that are helpful. My dog just stared resolutely at the feeding puzzle (and i bought the beginner one), but it seems to work for most dogs! I don't think my dog could possibly be better behaved but he's a border collie who likes having his brain challenged . I'm going to check out that page. Thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 What's with all this "she's bending over backwards to train her own dog for his sake" not really. You have to do all these things regardless of whether you have a partner or not. Ignored my points about their first interaction, whether the dog likes him, and all the issues that I see (as an animal lover). I mean she is happy to sit on the dogs couch, wrapped in dog blanket, eating while the dog is on her lap staring and drooling. To me that is going to be an issue to many guys. Sure maybe none of this matters anymore as the relationship is hanging by a thread. He isn't ghosting, he's thinking whether he can do this anymore before having the talk. Personally I couldn't live like that either. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 19, 2018 Author Share Posted November 19, 2018 I would like to hear more about the dog bowl/feeding puzzle things you use. I think my dog would like that. In the mornind I give her a stuffed kong soak in water and stuff the kong. Top it off with mashed banana, stick a treat bone in there and leave it in the freezer. It keeps her busy for about 30 minutes every morning. It's. not big enough for her full portion though She gets her dinner in this https://www.amazon.ca/gp/product//ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o08_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 19, 2018 Author Share Posted November 19, 2018 What's with all this "she's bending over backwards to train her own dog for his sake" not really. You have to do all these things regardless of whether you have a partner or not. Ignored my points about their first interaction, whether the dog likes him, and all the issues that I see (as an animal lover). I mean she is happy to sit on the dogs couch, wrapped in dog blanket, eating while the dog is on her lap staring and drooling. To me that is going to be an issue to many guys. Sure maybe none of this matters anymore as the relationship is hanging by a thread. He isn't ghosting, he's thinking whether he can do this anymore before having the talk. Personally I couldn't live like that either. He has actually never seen me eat on the couch with the dog next to me. I'm fine with it but I get it's not everyone's cup of tea so the only time this happens is when it's just me an her. As soon as there is a guest we eat on the table and she is not allowed to beg. I realize I should be more constant as far as that goes but my point is I don't make him eat on the couch, with the dog on sitting next to him and sniffing his food. Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 19, 2018 Author Share Posted November 19, 2018 I don't think my dog could possibly be better behaved but he's a border collie who likes having his brain challenged . I'm going to check out that page. Thank you! Gosh, Border Collies are lovely but they have to have something to do! Actually, the woman who is doing the Naughty but Nice thing has Border Collies (I believe she does agility competition with them) Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 19, 2018 Author Share Posted November 19, 2018 Gosh, I hope he didn't get his man bun into too much of an uproar when his yoga was interrupted. Just an aside here, but maybe you want to look for a ... how do I say.. a manlier man next time? I'll be honest. You've been with this clown for only 4 months. Are you honestly going to let him continue making you feel BAD because your dog is acting like a dog? Are you going to continue pandering to him, to the point where you're constantly compromising your dog's freedom around your own house and apologizing for everything your dog does like you're in the wrong and man-bun is in the right????? He's a freakin' guest in your home! Does he pay rent? Does he have furniture there? Does his mail come there? Why on earth are you bending over backwards to pander to some fool who doesn't even LIVE there? But guess who does live there? Your dog! I'd be sending Yoga Boy packing without a backward glance. Never, EVER compromise your life or parts of your life for a douche bag. I have to say, I laughed out loud at that post. Anyhow, he is coming over at 7 after all. Hopefully he has the decency to bring me my stuff back. His is bagged and ready to go. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 In the mornind I give her a stuffed kong soak in water and stuff the kong. Top it off with mashed banana, stick a treat bone in there and leave it in the freezer. It keeps her busy for about 30 minutes every morning. It's. not big enough for her full portion though She gets her dinner in this https://www.amazon.ca/gp/product//ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o08_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1 My stupid dogs can't get the peanut butter out of the kong, leaving me to have to do it. I never anticipated that little issue. They're supposed to stay with it, but nooooo. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted November 19, 2018 Share Posted November 19, 2018 I had a foster dog that was just enough Border Collie to be devious. And then I adopted her. She had this "go to hell" look in her eye even on the day I met her to foster. Then she had it thereafter every time I scolded her for trashing whatever it was. But when she wasn't being naughty, she was a love. And so soft. And her and my other little dog were the best of friends and would annoy each other both laying on their sides facing each other for hours sometimes. I really miss that. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 He doesn't like your dog. You are happy with your dog but thinking of trying to make your dog more acceptable to him. I think you are wasting your time. The dog is never going to be acceptable to him. Maybe he doesn't like dogs. Just because they had dogs in his family doesn't mean he personally liked them. I think you'd be better off accepting that you and your dog come as a package and that he is not the one for you (or your pet). Give up on this guy and, when you are over him, find someone who loves dogs like you do. Link to post Share on other sites
I'veseenbetterlol Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 This is a weird situation, but I would pick my pets over a guy I've barely dated. Its a super strange phenomena, but tbh he may not be interested in having a relationship w/you and using the dog as an excuse. I was dating a guy long distance and he had a cat of his own. When he came to visit, he couldn't stand my cat. My cat is very nice, a tad bit hyper, but a total sweetheart. I think he resented the whole situation and instead of telling me straight up, he used the cat as a scapegoat. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 My stupid dogs can't get the peanut butter out of the kong, leaving me to have to do it. I never anticipated that little issue. They're supposed to stay with it, but nooooo. My dog doesn't even like peanut butter. I'd have to fill it with cheese whiz! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 20, 2018 Author Share Posted November 20, 2018 I had a foster dog that was just enough Border Collie to be devious. And then I adopted her. She had this "go to hell" look in her eye even on the day I met her to foster. Then she had it thereafter every time I scolded her for trashing whatever it was. But when she wasn't being naughty, she was a love. And so soft. And her and my other little dog were the best of friends and would annoy each other both laying on their sides facing each other for hours sometimes. I really miss that. Haha! We were told she was a border collie/labrador mix so she doesn’t have that devious personality I’ve heard so mich about. She does however have the smarts 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author GoreSP Posted November 20, 2018 Author Share Posted November 20, 2018 This is a weird situation' date=' but I would pick my pets over a guy I've barely dated. Its a super strange phenomena, but tbh he may not be interested in having a relationship w/you and using the dog as an excuse. I was dating a guy long distance and he had a cat of his own. When he came to visit, he couldn't stand my cat. My cat is very nice, a tad bit hyper, but a total sweetheart. I think he resented the whole situation and instead of telling me straight up, he used the cat as a scapegoat.[/quote'] Interesting. He swore the dog had nothing to do with us breaking up. ? He did however started listing every single thing he thought I did wrong sonce we started dating. I day started because I cut him off and told him that if he already made his decision he just go. His stuff was already packed. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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