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You don't sound that confused.


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You sound like you know exactly what's going on. He isn't ready to date so stop the kissy kissy and the hand holding if you aren't dating unless you want a casual relationship. I think that is where you are getting confused. Draw a clear line for him on what the relationship is. Tell him you still want to be friends (if you do) and tell him to let you know if and when he is ready to start dating. At the same time, don't wait around for him to decide what he wants. Get on with your life. Date other people if you want. It sounds like he gave you a clear answer of what he wants. Maybe you should start spending less time with him.

I'm exceedingly confused about my relationship with this particular guy friend. I've known him for years, but this is the first year that I really have talked to him. We've been close 'friends' for about 4 months now, and we feel like we've known eachother forever. Here's where the confusion lies...he says that he isn't interested in a relationship right now. I can honestly admit that an exclusive relationship probably is not what he needs. I thought that I was okay with the way things are going; Let me clarify, he has taken me to places that personally mean a lot to him (he has only previosly taken his father there), we go to the park all the time where we do hold hands (although not as much as we used to), arms are around eachother, and we have a great time talking about everything and nothing at the same time...but he doesn't want a relationship. I can understand a few of his reasons, but am puzzled. 1. He has never had a true "relationship" before, so this is new to him. 2. He isn't sure if he can balance his time with his friends and with me. 3. I'm going off to college in the fall. Anyways, he did say if he were ready to date someone, it would 'probably' be me. But lately, we havent' had much chemistry at all, and I'm not sure on whose part. Does anyone have any advice to offer? (I'm sure I probably answered a lot of my own question within the above passage, I'm just too blind to register)
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