hitswitch Posted September 13, 2005 Share Posted September 13, 2005 hi i need some advice off everyone. there is a girl im pretty much in love with whos at my high school. she doesnt know how i feel and i dont really want to tell her as i dont think myself good enough for her. i have 2 yrs b4 we leave for colleges so i have time to improve dome things abt myself.i started goin to a gym to get a good body, taking dance lessons cos i heard this is attractive to women. im quite good at sports (basketball) already and am begining to be a bit more image concious,(like cutting my nails insted of bitin them). i just need a list of other ideas to make myself 'better' . Thankyou. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted September 13, 2005 Share Posted September 13, 2005 Find out what YOU like about yourself... Everyone has something special and unique about them (and I'm not talking short bus special like in my case ) It could be that you're funny without trying or you're a great listener and people come to you for words of advice... then build on those things you've already got WITHIN you... Obviously a physical attractiveness is good... so yes improving your body is a good idea but not just because it makes your outward appearance better but because it makes you healthy and stronger... and it makes YOU feel better about yourself. Choosing the right clothes is also good... but again it is how you feel about YOU inside that will also make the difference to how those clothes fit on you (does that make sense?) That you feel so damn good about who you are, you can pull off anything. When it's a matter of finding an interest in someone... thats good to go that you find that person attractive BUT what do you like about them as a PERSON... find things that the 2 of you have in common and build on that. OR skip it all, buy a pimp daddy grill and woooorrrrrrrkkkkk it! JK JK JK! I have zero doubt you will be successful in your venture to improve yourself, you're half way there IMO by taking the initative Link to post Share on other sites
Dean3922 Posted September 13, 2005 Share Posted September 13, 2005 i feel and i don't really want to tell her as i don't think myself good enough for her You have already lost the battle with this statement. Do you think that by improving your outward self that she is going to like the inward you? There is nothing wrong in wanting to have a nice appearance but the first thing you need to improve is the inner you: that person who thinks you are not good enough for someone. If she cannot see your inner self then what makes you think she will see your outward self? Happiness comes from within so I would work on improving your confidence and shyness first and then let that come out to show the world that, " here I am". It will take some work but in the long run you will get much more satisfaction from the new confident you than the macho you. Good Luck... Link to post Share on other sites
bluechocolate Posted September 13, 2005 Share Posted September 13, 2005 There is nothing wrong in wanting to have a nice appearance but the first thing you need to improve is the inner you: that person who thinks you are not good enough for someone. If she cannot see your inner self then what makes you think she will see your outward self? Happiness comes from within so I would work on improving your confidence and shyness first and then let that come out to show the world that, " here I am". It will take some work but in the long run you will get much more satisfaction from the new confident you than the macho you. I was looking for words very similar to that. Not much point in being a stud if you're still shy & feel like you don't deserve her. Also, be careful about placing her on a pedestal - she farts & burps just like you! One consistent thing that everyone, male & female, says they find attractive is confidence & self-esteem. Improving your physical self will definitely help to build those, but that is only part of the story. bit more image conscious,(like cutting my nails instead of biting them) That made me laugh over an old memory. It was a girl in high school who one day took out her nail clippers, clipped my nails for me & told me never to bite them again 'cause it's very ugly & unattractive. And you know what? I have never bitten my nails again. Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted September 13, 2005 Share Posted September 13, 2005 Congratulations on taking initiatives to improve yourself You also need to improve your self-esteem as the others have said. One way to do that is to do things you're proud of. For starters, you can be proud of the fact that you're smart enough to find ways to improve yourself and then pursue them. What's important is your character. Are you kind? Considerate? Polite? Honest? Women don't just want looks; they want men who are decent human beings. If you focus on your character and become a man of integrity, fairness, and decency, you'll have plenty of reasons to think well of yourself and that confidence - based on good character - will be very attractive to women. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts