Madd_hatter Posted December 26, 2018 Share Posted December 26, 2018 I was doing so well preparing for Christmas. There were times where I actually forgot about him completely. But last night..... I had a dream we were married and we had a newborn baby. I was holding the baby in my arms and kissing her and he was there with his arms around me and his child. I’ve never had a dream feel so real. I can’t begin to explain what it felt like. Bliss is the only word that comes to mind. Waking up and realizing it wasn’t real was excruciating. Set me back months!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
losangelena Posted December 26, 2018 Share Posted December 26, 2018 This is okay, you’re okay. I doubt this is a permanent setback. This kind of stuff happens and it’s par for the course. It’s two steps forward, one step back, unfortunately. Just hang in there. Don’t let yourself spiral from this. Link to post Share on other sites
Beachead Posted December 26, 2018 Share Posted December 26, 2018 I was doing so well preparing for Christmas. There were times where I actually forgot about him completely. But last night..... I had a dream we were married and we had a newborn baby. I was holding the baby in my arms and kissing her and he was there with his arms around me and his child. I’ve never had a dream feel so real. I can’t begin to explain what it felt like. Bliss is the only word that comes to mind. Waking up and realizing it wasn’t real was excruciating. Set me back months!!!! Been there. You'll get past it. Give a it a couple of days. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Madd_hatter Posted December 27, 2018 Author Share Posted December 27, 2018 So I do have a question. How do I stop dreaming of someone, or something specific? Like what triggers them? How can I avoid the triggers? The dreams are worse than actually seeing him. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy Lemming Posted December 27, 2018 Share Posted December 27, 2018 How do I stop dreaming of someone, or something specific? A couple of years ago, my father was having a lot of vivid nightmares. He wanted the dreams to stop. I did some research and found some supplements that claimed to stop vivid dreams. I ordered a couple for him. Oddly, they seem to have worked for him. They didn't completely take away all of the dreams, but they were greatly reduced. Unfortunately, I don't remember which one I ordered for him. So my advice, would be to do some research on supplements and try one or two. Just my two cents... Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 27, 2018 Share Posted December 27, 2018 So I do have a question. How do I stop dreaming of someone, or something specific? Like what triggers them? How can I avoid the triggers? The dreams are worse than actually seeing him. don't eat just before going to sleep. studies have shown that eating half a pepperoni pizza just before bed time will cause nightmares. Link to post Share on other sites
Beachead Posted December 27, 2018 Share Posted December 27, 2018 (edited) So I do have a question. How do I stop dreaming of someone, or something specific? Like what triggers them? How can I avoid the triggers? The dreams are worse than actually seeing him. Dreaming is related to brain activity. We always dream but the more active your brain is in the night before you fall asleep, the more vivid or nightmarish they will become and the more you will remember them. Certain things will increase brain activity such as eating full meals late, drinking coffee or drinks with caffeine, or using the computer to do work or general stuff. Using the phone as well. There are studies associated with these activities and dreaming as well as sleep issues. I myself, have had problems when I do some of these things. So don't eat anything heavy right before bed, don't drink coffee or any caffeine containing drinks after 5, shut your phone and computer off atleast an hour before bed to minimize this. If you want to watch something online, then try something relaxing such as ASMR, background white noise, or just instrumental music that is calming in nature. There are also supplements like Happy Lemming suggested that can aid with sleep as well but you only turn to this after you do the other things first. I know those dreams aren't pleasant. I used to be afraid to sleep because of them. But sometimes, those dreams can show us things that are just what we need to get out of our rut. - Beach Edited December 27, 2018 by Beachead Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted December 27, 2018 Share Posted December 27, 2018 How do I stop dreaming of someone, or something specific? Like what triggers them? Dreams are the psyche's way of working out problems or helping us to see new directions. The most important aspect is proper interpretation. In this case, you were doing well, even to the point of sometimes completely forgetting about him. So, your dream, even though it contained elements of him as being the source of love and/or comfort, is not necessarily about that as much as the fact that you can give birth to new ideas and experiences that are filled with love and comfort...bliss, as you say. That is, it could also have been a message that you are perfectly capable, on your own, to give birth to new things in the New Year. . 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted December 27, 2018 Share Posted December 27, 2018 Freud has a word for that: wish fulfillment. Another reason you need to be in therapy. Link to post Share on other sites
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