Crush on a guy at my college who all girls thinks is insanely gorgeous

[stillafool]

Sounds good, I will try that next time I get a chance to talk to him.

 

Would that giggling/blushing behavior really get that old to him, though?

I have always assumed that he loves when girls show interest for him like that, and always boost his ego and give him incredibly easy opportunities for dates.

 

Just wondering, in case I end up acting like that myself without helping it. xP

 

No, he's used to that behavior from girls and it's common for him.

[stillafool]

The times when I have seen him in the company of girls he has always seemed to be very dominant, in a good way - he confidently escalates their conversations and touches their arms or their waist at appropriate times while talking, he keeps eye contact without the least bit of problem until they blush and look away (it's always the girls who look away first, he never shows any signs of shyness whatsoever), and he talks with a confident, clear voice.

So those signs seem very promising.

 

Of course he acts that way, he's the prize.

[Katie1999]

No, he's used to that behavior from girls and it's common for him.

I see, but shouldn't there have been a period in his life when he absolutely loved to be hit on like that, and took all those advantages?

Like, slept with lots and lots of girls just because he could?

I always kind of assumed that.

[stillafool]

I bet he was cleaning up in junior high and high school. Girls have never been a problem for this guy that is why he's so smooth.

[Garcon1986]

Watch out - that stuff can get you emotionally hurt.

 

 

Not all guys like the opportunity to sleep with lots of people, although many do. You won't know which one he is until you have a good chat and tea with the old chap.

[Garcon1986]

On the other hand, if you can separate sex, love, and intimacy in your mind, and just want to experience a quick fling with a cute guy, go have at it. Just remember the potential downsides

[Katie1999]

Watch out - that stuff can get you emotionally hurt.

 

 

Not all guys like the opportunity to sleep with lots of people, although many do. You won't know which one he is until you have a good chat and tea with the old chap.

Yes, I have been thinking about that as well.

It seems very likely that lots of the girls that he has hot dates with fall in love with him and then get really sad when he dumps them.

[d0nnivain]

What's your goal here? Do you want a BF or do you just want to get in his bed? If all you are after is sex, go at him full steam. Of course he likes that attention; who wouldn't? It's flattering.

 

If you want a relationship with this guy, you have to get to know him. You have to be the girl who is not throwing herself at him. He doesn't value the cleavage, the flirting, the come-ons because he gets so much of that.

[Katie1999]

What's your goal here? Do you want a BF or do you just want to get in his bed? If all you are after is sex, go at him full steam. Of course he likes that attention; who wouldn't? It's flattering.

 

If you want a relationship with this guy, you have to get to know him. You have to be the girl who is not throwing herself at him. He doesn't value the cleavage, the flirting, the come-ons because he gets so much of that.

Haha, I have actually considered the "full steam" approach to begin with.

What should I do if I attempt that?

Just dress in tight revealing clothes, call him hot and encourage him to touch me?

[Garcon1986]

As your Loveshack friend I would like for you to avoid being taken for an emotional rollercoaster ride if you can easily avoid it.

[preraph]

If you're college age, yes, he will probably go for it, but if he's a little older, even a hookup may be off the table unless he's attracted. But I think what you'll do is hope he "falls" for you and be disappointed. If you think you want something more from him, don't just go full steam to get in bed with him.

[basil67]

Haha, I have actually considered the "full steam" approach to begin with.

What should I do if I attempt that?

Just dress in tight revealing clothes, call him hot and encourage him to touch me?

 

Katie, what is your end goal? If you want to date him, don't approach him with this bimbo technique.

[thefooloftheyear]

Show a lot of cleavage and go after it....

 

TFY

[Giraffe-A]

Since he is used to the attention, he is usually looking for something more than looks.

 

The jock in my school had girls lined up. I sat next to him and we talked about Michael Jordan and traded football cards. I was NO WHERE good looking as these other girls. They’d even pass by me as say, “yeah...in your dreams fat girl.” Yet he said he was in love in with for many years. He said it was my smile.

 

Then I met a second guy that all the girls were after. I was a looker by then so I caught his eye. But I was also different from all the girls there in apperance. He liked that I had a real job lol. I fixed his AC and he was just in love. Unfortunately, I didn’t want to date anyone for about 3 years so we became good friends. No sex, nada. Anyway... just be you.

[d0nnivain]

Haha, I have actually considered the "full steam" approach to begin with.

What should I do if I attempt that?

Just dress in tight revealing clothes, call him hot and encourage him to touch me?

 

That may get you laid but understand the guy will think you are a floozy & won't respect you.

[See-Me-Feel-Me]

....In that case, what's the best way to flirt blatantly?

Haha.

 

 

Dress to accentuate your best features. Psyche yourself up to exude confidence in your manner but absolutely don't throw yourself at him. Play the longer game of making him notice that you're different. It is really best to have a unique mystique about your ways--even if you have to fake them. "All is fair in love and war" as they say. I put on airs when I was young that girls dug. I am 6'3 and was about 175 lbs at college age with blue eyes, very full brown hair and a pronounced dimple when I smile or smirk. I was chased but was picky and I hated fawning. To build a mystique means self disciplining your immediate feelings always so that a man is driven to wonder about what you think and if you care that he exists. Yum.

[Katie1999]

By the way, slightly off-topic, but I just realised that I have known about some other extremely handsome guys in school as well, but for some reason they haven't been nearly as popular, or even popular at all, and I have always found it a bit strange how it can be so different for different gorgeous guys.

Last year there was one guy with "model looks" (he was fit in general and had a beautiful face) who was by himself pretty much all the time and who didn't really talk to anyone.

I heard that be was a bit of a loner and that he never went to parties or anything, so maybe that was part of the reason.

He also seemed a bit awkward around people when he spokae to them, even though he could handle them fine for a couple minutes.

Edited December 29, 2018 by Katie1999

[See-Me-Feel-Me]

Men like a challenge. They like to "chase". It is in their nature.

 

If he's a passive "come to me" and "fawn over me" type, then he's not going to be any good in the long term anyway.

 

 

That's a myth, Wally. We like a challenge but guys are neurotic about initiating when they are young. That's why they say odd and doofy ****. My male friends when I was a teen showed me what NOT to do. Girls didn't go for them. They mostly went for me because I put them at ease--even though I was nervous inside too. It takes guile to attract. Conquering is not satisfying at all believe it or not. Enticing is divine.

[Garcon1986]

There are many loner guys on this forum - they project undesirable body language and bad attitude, and are penalized for it. You can be a sexy sexy man, be very shy, and then women will avoid you.

 

As easy as that. It's looks and social skills that make the cake.

[Katie1999]

There are many loner guys on this forum - they project undesirable body language and bad attitude, and are penalized for it. You can be a sexy sexy man, be very shy, and then women will avoid you.

 

As easy as that. It's looks and social skills that make the cake.

Ah okay, so maybe the hot and successful guys could build self-confidence quite easily during childhood and then that self-confidence stayed with them and complemented their hot looks in that way that made them truly desirable, and the other hot guys got into some problems that made them lose their self-confidence and knocked them off balance, so that they stopped being desirable in the same way.

Something like that, perhaps?

 

I do remember that some or them would be almost invisible in general, but as soon as they became relaxed and more talkative - or smiled and seemed at ease, or something - several girls suddenly started staring and found them gorgeous.

Pretty funny.

Edited December 29, 2018 by Katie1999

[Garcon1986]

The other alternative is those men never chose to build their social skills with women in the first place. What makes it harder than socializing with men is the physical attraction.

 

If I had my way, part of kindergarten would involve mandatory socializing with the opposite gender until the end of middle school so that men would all at least have basic social skills, and we would both understand each other a little better. A lot of this dating mumbo jumbo would be solved if all children did this.

 

Approaching dating with confidence and quality body language is the healthiest way to go about things - while upholding your safety.

[Lotus_Luna]

Wanna know how go catch a guy?

 

Be you... be interesting, be opinionated and passionate but also well mannered.

 

Men like him may still be intimidated by women. I know, I caught one. And what he liked about me was that I was my quirky self.

 

So value that, dont feel you need to edit yourself to be typical.

[bradt93]

By the way, slightly off-topic, but I just realised that I have known about some other extremely handsome guys in school as well, but for some reason they haven't been nearly as popular, or even popular at all, and I have always found it a bit strange how it can be so different for different gorgeous guys.

Last year there was one guy with "model looks" (he was fit in general and had a beautiful face) who was by himself pretty much all the time and who didn't really talk to anyone.

I heard that be was a bit of a loner and that he never went to parties or anything, so maybe that was part of the reason.

He also seemed a bit awkward around people when he spokae to them, even though he could handle them fine for a couple minutes.

I'm the same way, I'm a commuter though so I don't really hang out on campus. I just go to class and go home. It doesn't mean those who doesn't really like to talk to people are "losers" or anything.

[thefooloftheyear]

Funny story that pertains to the thread...

 

Ive been out of HS for more than 30 years...A family member of mine runs a local business in the town where I grew up..A nicely dressed middle aged woman walks in and the family member introduces herself and hands the woman a business card...They chat for a while and the woman notices the name on the business card.. So she asks if the business owner knew or was related to (X person)-me...Comes to find out that of course she does, and the woman goes on to tell my family member how for 2 years straight she had this huge crush on me but couldn't muster the nerve to approach and I was not receptive to her subtle advances..

 

When the story comes back to me, she gives me the name of the woman, but I couldn't recall her or put a face to the name...Back then I was so consumed with athletics and while I had girlfriends, I was more aloof to it...I had to look it up in the yearbook...Sure enough, there she was, and to be honest she was quite attractive and my type...I would have probably went out with her...

 

Moral of the story...Don't always wait/hope that a guy would come to you or even accept your subtle advances...Smart women go after what they want...You have nothing to lose, really....No one looks down on any woman that approaches....More so now than ever...

 

TFY

[Katie1999]

If you want a relationship with this guy, you have to get to know him. You have to be the girl who is not throwing herself at him. He doesn't value the cleavage, the flirting, the come-ons because he gets so much of that.

So does that mean that he just gets all of that out of nowhere?

 

I do remember a very cute blonde girl (about 5'3 tall I guess, slender, and probably a 34D cup) a couple months ago who seemed to try to combine as many techniques as possible, when he was sitting by himself (which is rare) at a table and she was standing maybe 20 feet away from him - she was wearing tight black leggings and a tight red tank top, and she had her head in a cute tilt and played with her hair while batting her eyes at him and giving him her most tender gaze and her sweetest smile.

She even showed some borderline "dirty" signs like brushing her hands over her breasts when she moved her hands to the other side of her hair, and slowly moistening her lips several times while giving him a shy but firm "I want you" gaze.

He just sat there and casually checked her out, without even trying to hide that he looked right at her breasts or her belly pretty often, and she just smiled even more and blushed, and she looked like she was gonna start giggling at any moment.

I am not sure what happened after that since I had to leave for a lecture, but it wouldn't surprise me one bit if they... "got private" later that day.

 

Do you think that this is something that would happen to him very often?

I mean, sure, this guy is abnormally attractive - like, one-in-a-billion attractive, no joke - but that whole scenario still felt a bit unreal.

Edited December 31, 2018 by Katie1999