depression is getting to me!

[Noemiforever43]

I am feeling like never before, my family says no worries all the pain would go away very soon, but I do not know if that true, all i know is it hurts to see that individual and knowing he is not in love with me anymore:

[Insoc]

It does indeed "hurt", my Ex told me this and I was in a world of **** for a month, I felt like I never felt before, heart palpitations, extreme panic disorders, felt like I was going to pass out and thought about my life is over, but I was wrong my life was just beginning. Within time, I felt better and you will too if you stay strong.

 

I don't know your situation, in my case I caught my Ex cheating on me, then when I confronted her she told me "I don't love you anymore". We had problems, but I wished she handled it differently, just told me we have to end this.

 

I filed for Divorce, I moved out of the house, I did all the work, she recently has stated over the holidays that now she is having a hard time, saying she ruined my life and did this to me, when in reality it was a blessing, I was manipulated into thinking our failing marriage was going to last, for 5+ years it has been getting worse. Sometimes you need to fall hard to realize how bad it is, at least for me, what worked for me may not work for everyone else.

 

I kept saying I "love you" to her, I tried to get her to reconcile, but I was still not realizing this was the wrong thing at the time, to stay in this marriage would have been a disaster and it was indeed over.

 

Now it's been several months, we still talk via e-mail and I stop in to drop off a support check till my divorce is final, I do plan to retract as it's not healthy talking, not sure if we will stay friends after the divorce is final, I kinda doubt it. I accepted it and I think she did too, our marriage is over and any love we had is gone. There are memories and good ones, but moving forward is the best thing to do as life is too short to live unhappy.

 

The emotions are going to tear you up, just do your best to drown it out, stay busy, exercise, venture to places that are new to you, new experiences drown out the old and give your mind something fresh, though the pain will linger you have to remember there is someone out there who will love you someday.

Edited January 1, 2019 by Insoc

[Noemiforever43]

It does indeed "hurt", my Ex told me this and I was in a world of **** for a month, I felt like I never felt before, heart palpitations, extreme panic disorders, felt like I was going to pass out and thought about my life is over, but I was wrong my life was just beginning. Within time, I felt better and you will too if you stay strong.

 

I don't know your situation, in my case I caught my Ex cheating on me, then when I confronted her she told me "I don't love you anymore". We had problems, but I wished she handled it differently, just told me we have to end this.

 

I filed for Divorce, I moved out of the house, I did all the work, she recently has stated over the holidays that now she is having a hard time, saying she ruined my life and did this to me, when in reality it was a blessing, I was manipulated into thinking our failing marriage was going to last, for 5+ years it has been getting worse. Sometimes you need to fall hard to realize how bad it is, at least for me, what worked for me may not work for everyone else.

 

I kept saying I "love you" to her, I tried to get her to reconcile, but I was still not realizing this was the wrong thing at the time, to stay in this marriage would have been a disaster and it was indeed over.

 

Now it's been several months, we still talk via e-mail and I stop in to drop off a support check till my divorce is final, I do plan to retract as it's not healthy talking, not sure if we will stay friends after the divorce is final, I kinda doubt it. I accepted it and I think she did too, our marriage is over and any love we had is gone. There are memories and good ones, but moving forward is the best thing to do as life is too short to live unhappy.

 

The emotions are going to tear you up, just do your best to drown it out, stay busy, exercise, venture to places that are new to you, new experiences drown out the old and give your mind something fresh, though the pain will linger you have to remember there is someone out there who will love you someday.

you are so right! is just so painful at this time, in due time I would be able to see him and no longer feel anything.

[Garcon1986]

Hey have you considered watching British comedy shows or Mr Bean? It's a great medicine in my own tough times.

[Garcon1986]

The story of the bloke who accidentally bought a horse:

[Noemiforever43]

Hey have you considered watching British comedy shows or Mr Bean? It's a great medicine in my own tough times.

I never had

but will try it

[Garcon1986]

start with that video link tell me what you think.

[d0nnivain]

Break ups suck but the acute pain passes. Hang on to the support & love you are getting from family

[Insoc]

you are so right! is just so painful at this time, in due time I would be able to see him and no longer feel anything.

 

There is one thing that people do during times like this, we all do it, I did it. We don't think of ourselves, we only think of the other person and the feelings we had for them, the bond or memories and say "why?". that's what I did the love you feel for them is not mutual, and it's hard to flip a switch when hearing that, I know. I had to stop myself and realize this, that I was wasting my time and life trying to make someone love me who didn't anymore, when there is someone out there who will fill that void, I just need to find her. So I told myself that, I started to let go and it will take time, but it happens.

 

As time goes on, I realize now more than ever, that my break-up/divorce was the best thing that happened to me. I appreciate the good times and memories I had with my ex and our time together, but the hard times and issues were something that never went away, I was only living with blinders on thinking they would get better.

 

I now can go out and casually date, experience new things and new people, have what I was missing (hopefully). It feels good to meet new people, even if it doesn't materialize, I don't get my hopes up high and i don't want to step into another bad relationship if I see something that concerns me.

 

It's going to take time for you, everyone is different, for me within 2 months, I was feeling better. Now that it's a New Year, I made myself a promise to take it to the next level and push on.

 

Good Luck, hang in there...it get's better in time.