ljn1650 Posted January 5, 2019 Share Posted January 5, 2019 I had an old flame from 2011/12 that ended messily, and he mistreated me, there was an abortion involved. When it all happened I was deeply heartbroken, but over the years the pain diminished and i moved on healthily. The problem is, he has been trying to engage with me in recent years he messaged my friend he had messed up with me and regrets not choosing me. He later told her to ignore him as he was drunk. She told me, I left it, not feeling the need to chase it up. Eventually, a couple of months ago he got hold of me on social media, and i thought this time i would let him say his piece and allow him and me to move on from it all for good, and that i don't hold a grudge towards him.....however, I just got a 'wanted to see how you were' message, and none of the apologies and platitudes etc he gave to my friend about me. I left it, and assumed he had his closure. However, he is back again and has been liking old pictures of me on my profile. I don't wish him any ill-will, and want him to be happy despite everything - so i don't particularly feel the need to block him. I want him to tell me how he feels, so we can talk so he can be done with it and let it go. how can it be addressed if he can't say these things to my face? Do i bring it up? Or just let him carry on the cycle? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 5, 2019 Share Posted January 5, 2019 It's gracious of you to have been willing to let him say his piece but you are right to recognize that him orbiting is bad for you. Block him on social media & be done with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted January 5, 2019 Share Posted January 5, 2019 (edited) so we can talk so he can be done with it and let it go Sweetie, after the way he mistreated you, I'm struggling to believe that you want to give HIM a chance to get "closure". There's something else driving your interest here. Why do you care if HE gets closure? If this wasn't about you, you'd be able to ignore and/or just block him without a second thought. Do yourself a favor and block him from everything because you aren't over all of this. You do it for YOU and no one else. If you think you or he will get some kind of closure, it's rarely what people hope it will be and usually just stirs things up and set them back in their recovery from that kind of history. Edited January 5, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Repair quote 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted January 5, 2019 Share Posted January 5, 2019 I want him to tell me how he feels, so we can talk so he can be done with it and let it go. how can it be addressed if he can't say these things to my face? Do i bring it up? Or just let him carry on the cycle? I think you're assigning him more honorable motives than probably exist. He's more likely interested in simply hooking up and is testing your appetite for same. As d0nnivain said, blocking him is the best solution, unless you're interested in revisiting old times... Mr. Lucky 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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