guild11 Posted January 6, 2019 Share Posted January 6, 2019 Hello guys, I'm 28, about a 2 month ago our company hired 5 more employees. They all went to different departments but I still had to do a small briefing since some of the are specialized to my department's work field. During the briefing I met her for the first time, she is 23... we didn't socialized much... plain expectation discussion. But the buttom line is... that I saw her and I liked it! Yet again I found myself in situation that we started calling each other on break times... then the flirting came and eventually she ended up in my house... the overall exprience with her was the best I ever had, serioisly... I was in multiple relationships before but nothing was compared to this. Now it seems that I have a growing crush on her... we still get hooked but the current situation doesn't satisify me completly... I want more then that. Once I took her home, I somehow hinted about "us" but she had a moment of thinking and said that she doesn't want to talk about it. As for her... she seems to enjoy my authority in / out of the work, always compliments me about it. As for me...I'm a bit tired acting as somone else when I'm out of the office. Sometimes I just to call her and ask how was her day and wish her a good night I'm aware that we are in open relationship and I try to keep it cool without getting feelings involved but each days it just gets tougher to maintain the situation as it is. Should I end it now ? Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted January 7, 2019 Share Posted January 7, 2019 I'm going to assume your use of "trouble" and "again" means you understand multiple work place flirtations and relationships simply provide repeated opportunities to get dragged into something unpleasant. Whether through jealousy, vindictiveness or anger, one of your current or ex-partners may allege something you'd have a hard time disproving and may even be guilty of. Don't you have other opportunities to meet women? Trolling the break room for hookups is not a recipe for career success... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Simple Logic Posted January 7, 2019 Share Posted January 7, 2019 End it now? Actually you should have never got started. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mrs._December Posted January 7, 2019 Share Posted January 7, 2019 Should I end it now ? Would you even if every single poster told you you should? I have the feeling you're going to ride this right to the bitter end. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 8, 2019 Share Posted January 8, 2019 You don't have to end it now. You can end it later when she files sexual harassment charges against you & your company's lawyers make you end it. You had a consensual relationship. You expressed a desire for more but did not get agreement from her. Her failure to enthusiastically say yes is tantamount to a no. In the work place your failure to respect that no -- especially if you have authority over her at work -- will get you fired. Is she really worth all that, especially if you won't get her in the end? Don't risk it. If she wants more, she knows where to find you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted January 9, 2019 Share Posted January 9, 2019 You don't have to end it now. You can end it later when she files sexual harassment charges against you & your company's lawyers make you end it. Lol. Definitely not a recipe for career success... Link to post Share on other sites
Fugu Posted January 11, 2019 Share Posted January 11, 2019 You don't have to end it now. You can end it later when she files sexual harassment charges against you & your company's lawyers make you end it. You had a consensual relationship. You expressed a desire for more but did not get agreement from her. Her failure to enthusiastically say yes is tantamount to a no. In the work place your failure to respect that no -- especially if you have authority over her at work -- will get you fired. Is she really worth all that, especially if you won't get her in the end? Don't risk it. If she wants more, she knows where to find you. So much this ^ OP, assuming we're not being trolled, it would be very easy for her to put you in a compromising position. Here's what most HR people will tell you: if you have sexual contact with a subordinate, even if she technically consents to it, she can turn around later and say that she didn't. She can claim that your power differential influenced her and coerced her into sex. And guess what, you'd never get a chance to fight it in court. It would never make it to a courtroom because your company's insurance agency would settle out of court, making her lawyers (and her) richer, and your company poorer. And I'm guessing your company's HR office wouldn't want much to do with you after that. Link to post Share on other sites
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