Why Are You Hard To Live With?

[littleblackheart]

The main reason I'm hard to live with is that I don't actually like living with anyone, - other than my children, mainly because they're great.

 

I find questions like 'what time will you be back' to be extremely annoying (I don't have a crystal ball, so I don't know when I'll be back) and I feel smothered at the drop of a hat. When I was younger and more of a people pleaser, I would make huge efforts to accommodate others around me. Now, I don't even bother.

[L0nely]

Thank you for this great thread!

 

 

My husband has complained about:

 

 

- my procrastination on housework such as not doing dishes right away, pile up loads of laundry, dinner is never on time (6pm , 8pm, 10pm, even midnight on some days)

 

 

- I cry over the littlest things such as being called "small brain".

 

 

- my lack of energy to "get on top" for sex time.

[Kitty Tantrum]

Oh man, I've got more. I could probably spend hours coming up with things that are wrong with me.

 

- I suffer from analysis paralysis/indecision. Don't take me to a restaurant I've never been to before unless you're prepared to order for me, or spend a really long time looking at the menu. Sitting down at a new restaurant and seeing that they have a really long menu is enough to make me want to cry. Being asked to make any sort of decision on the spot (unless it's about my kids, I've got that pretty well under control) will yield a deer-in-the-headlights look.

 

- I'm a militant cleaner. I WILL pick your stuff up and put it away somewhere else if you habitually leave it lying around cluttering up common areas. Can't find it later? Should have put it away yourself. I WILL throw away your old leftovers. I will NOT leave your dishes in the sink for you to wash later, and I don't care if that makes you feel annoyed or sheepish. Make no mistake: if you don't clean it, I WILL. I've had all sorts of people complain about this/ask me not to wash their dishes. If it's someone else's house, FINE. But all dirty dishes and visible messes in MY house are fair game.

 

- Not hard just to live with, but hard to sleep with, maybe: I'm weird about bedding. At the LEAST, everything touching me (and preferably the innermost 3-4 layers on top and bottom) has to be natural fibers (I've got a cotton-ticked featherbed with a cotton case, a silk/cotton duvet in a cotton cover, and a thick wool blanket to top it all off), AND I can't stand it if the edge of a blanket or sheet touches me. Everything has to be folded down just so. I will absolutely fuss with this at 2am if it comes unfolded and wakes me up. Pretty sure my fiancé likes the bedding, but the fussing not so much.

 

- I'm the kind of person who can eat the same foods over and over and over, and I think it's a perfectly sensible thing to do in the interest of saving time and money. I have a brief list of cheap, basic staple foods that I pretty much always keep in stock and only a handful of pots/pans/tools and techniques I'm willing to use on a regular basis. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy gourmet cooking and I CAN make just about anything better than your favorite restaurant as long as I have enough BTUs. I just don't want to do that all the time. Variety is not a preference of mine. Simplicity is. My ex-husband had a hard time with this, and my kids do too. I think they felt/feel a little bit entitled to having a personal chef at their beck and call. Like, "you're such a good cook, how DARE you not make something complicated and exciting every single day??" My fiancé and I are, thankfully, much on the same page in this regard, and we like most of the same foods.

 

- I'm cheap. Not when it comes to food, safety/shelter, durable goods/tools/equipment, and things like that - but when it comes to experiences. I hate spending money (or energy) on toys, unnecessary gadgets, entertainment, leisure, "going out," etc. My ideal vacation is staying home doing NOTHING. And occasionally I'm cheap in ways that bite me in the butt... like when my fiancé let me choose my engagement ring and I convinced him that we should order the design I liked from the cheapest seller I could find... and it ended up being more than double the original cost, and slightly more than we would have paid elsewhere, due to poor workmanship and needing extensive repairs. Fortunately it was inexpensive to begin with, so not a terribly expensive lesson, but it was pretty embarrassing telling a jeweler that I needed to have my engagement ring repaired because I bought the cheapest one I could find from a shady retailer on the internet.

 

- I'm very passive/submissive (not talking kink, just personality/default relationship dynamic). My fiancé seems to be fine with this (possibly even prefers it), but my ex-husband complained about it regularly.

 

- I'm (hopefully) recovering from a chronic illness (Lyme disease or something very similar/associated). I was less than half capacity for more than a year, and I'm still nowhere near where I used to be in terms of how much I can do, mentally and physically. I've felt pretty guilty about how much my fiancé has had to work and take care of me. He hasn't complained, but that doesn't mean it's not hard. It sucks.

[Artdeco]

I like my privacy and alone-time, and can feel suffocated quickly.

I can be standoffish and quiet, withdrawn, not talking much.

I’m not a cuddler. I like my space.

[bathtub-row]

- I get lost in my own world to the exclusion of others

- I need a good deal of alone time

- I don’t always think of the other person’s needs because I’m so used to being self-sufficient that I think everyone else is like that

- I can come across as spoiled and self-centered

- I get bored very easily

- I make rash decisions

[BettyDraper]

I have been diagnosed with OCD. My illness manifests itself with cleaning, being a perfectionist, and fixations.

 

I am neurotic.

 

I hold grudges.

 

I can be cold at times.

 

I am Eeyore.

[Wallysbears]

I have a fast and hot Irish temper.

 

I am a bed hog...and blanket hog. And my husband says I snore if I have had wine.

 

I am a horrible house keeper...I hate cleaning. Even as a stay at home Mom I hated it. (And hired help to do it)

 

I have the attention span of a goldfish sometimes. I get easily distracted.

 

 

Thankfully, he loves me despite these faults. LOL

[SmartDude]

"So...Why Are You Hard To Live With?"

 

Because I wont let a women live with me. She has to have her own place.

[Arieswoman]

I am a 'neat freak' I can't stand mess and clutter

 

 

When I ask for something do be done (like mess picked up) I expect it to be done that day. (if I wanted it done next week, I would have asked next week)

 

 

If anyone makes a sandwich/snack, I expect them to wash the utensils and put them away away

 

 

 

I can't stand someone having a dump and then not opening the window in the bathroom ( I don't want my nostrils assailed by a mushroom cloud of miasma) and ffs clean up the bog after you, it doesn't take long.

 

 

 

There is no excuse for poor hygiene - ever

 

 

I need time alone sometimes (comes from years of living alone)

 

 

I need my sleep. If you want to go out late for a few beers then I'll be in the spare room as I don't want to hear you snoring like a buzz-saw

[The Dude Abides]

 

 

I can't stand someone having a dump and then not opening the window in the bathroom ( I don't want my nostrils assailed by a mushroom cloud of miasma) and ffs clean up the

 

 

Arieswoman, LMAO, I always say you Brits have a way with words. :lmao::lmao: I am going to have to add ‘mushroom cloud of miasma’ to my vernacular if you don’t mind :laugh: I will footnote you though. :D

 

Have a good day and no olfactory ordeals experienced anytime soon.

[Fair]

I have a total blind spot when it comes to myself. I think I'm easy going but what it appears to me always, is that for some bewildering reason others think I'm a handful. And it doesn't generally happen that an ex offers up any kind of truly helpful critique of your character to help you see yourself through another person's eyes. My ex's just have a tendency to quietly absent themselves. I've always wished someone would tell me what they see.

[mrs rubble]

My husband’s top 3 complaints;

1. I’m too independent and won’t ask for help.

2. I don’t like to answer his telephone (they’d call me if they wanted to talk to me)

3. I’m too laid back/willing to go with the flow rather than be decisive or dominant.

[What_Did_I_Do]

Great thread.

 

1) I am horribly indecisive but then pout when someone makes a decision for me that I don't like

 

2) Neat freak. My mom once called my house sterile

 

3) I get frustrated when people don't understand (my) logic. After all, I am second in line after Spock....LOL