jtro243 Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 It took my 6 years to find my ex. That relationship came out of nowhere and blindsided me. Started off as casually sex... and then in a few months this girl had me singing to love songs, cleaning the house, just counting the minutes until I saw her again. I've never connected with someone so strongly or had so much compatibility with someone like this since the first girl I ever truly loved. I don't use that term often (love) because out of the 8 or so relationships I've had in my life, I can honestly say I only loved 2 of them. I still care about my first love deeply and would entertain the idea of getting back together but I have zero desire for that. It took me so long to find the 2nd girl. Not because I can't get dates or have good sex. I have had both in plenty since the breakup. But I don't want to wait six more years to find a connection like that again, hell I barely realized I was falling in love when it happened. It's just bull****, I guess. Life showed me the perfect girl and we lacked the maturity to hold things together. Frustrating. I left my life behind to start over with her and now I'm standing here trying to figure out why the hell I'm here. Like what is the lesson, what is the purpose... For once I just wanted a second chance with a girl I really truly loved. Prayed to God for it feverishly. Yet life continues to just beat on me. ****, I guess I'll just go to graduate school and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 Catalogue what you loved about her & your 1st love. Focus on finding somebody with those traits but don't make them a check list. Happy hunting. Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 I see on another of your threads that you are only 24 so if you have had two major love relationships already then I'd say you're doing pretty good. I'm in my 50's now, never married but had a lot of boyfriends over the years but only 3 of them ever turned into serious love relationships. We're not supposed to fall madly in love with everyone we date. If love were that easy and that shallow we could all just marry the next person we date, except the divorce rates would be off the charts because we'd all be falling in love with new people. I fell head over heels in love the first time at 16. That relationship ended when I was 24. Didn't love again until I was 31 so that was a 7yr stretch of not falling for anyone I was dating. The last time I fell in love I was 39. That partner died when I was 48 and I haven't loved anyone since him. I think if we fell in love easily it would just cheapen the concept of true lasting love. If you're only 24 and you have already truly loved twice then I'd say you're doing pretty good. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jtro243 Posted January 15, 2019 Author Share Posted January 15, 2019 thank you, i appreciate your responses. I'm seeing someone now, but its been about a month and there really are no feelings there. Mild GIGS setting in for me, but I'm going to be patient and see if it will subside. I worry I may have started dating too soon. Link to post Share on other sites
I'veseenbetterlol Posted January 17, 2019 Share Posted January 17, 2019 Love is not going to necessarily take 6 years. I went through a bout of dating fails (used online dating) and I found my soul mate. This is a few years after my heart was shattered by my 1st love. Continue dating, but do not expect to fall in love with the 1st girl you meet, else you may settle for something you don't want. Link to post Share on other sites
Borntoelevate Posted January 18, 2019 Share Posted January 18, 2019 You’re young and have plenty of time. Keep working on yourself, building up your knowledge, skills and maturity. When you reach 30, my God, you’ll be reaping the rewards. Link to post Share on other sites
MeadowFlower Posted January 22, 2019 Share Posted January 22, 2019 I went through a bout of dating fails (used online dating) and I found my soul mate. This is a few years after my heart was shattered by my 1st love. Would you mind sharing some of your story? Link to post Share on other sites
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