chillii Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 (edited) After a divorce l later met someone , this wasn't just anyone. But we did have some big obstacles , one being she'd have to move to my country which was doable but later when some things.changed it was much harder and eventually we gave up and split. You'd probably call it more her decision than mine but it was not an easy thing. Anyway, 6mths passed and we touched base and she'd started seeing someone else and told me. l had too , and l told her too but not that l live with her. That was that until a few weeks ago , l heard from her again. but l've been trying to move on and l'm still with my woman, who is one helluva find btw. Buttttt, we were also what we were and so it's also been a bit confusing and a very big decision if supposing ex and l could've worked it out, Anyway , ex told me she'd split with this guy a few mths back, turned out he had a string of women. We talked about us and lots of stuff but we both know we'll never forget, Thing is, l'm not sure and l didn't wanna embarrass her asking, but l think she's reconsidering, she's 49. So if that's the case l have to be honest with her and tell her about my new gf because tbh l'm a bit stuck right now and need to make up my mind whether l would reconsider too , But a huge part of the whole situation is my gf. Do you think l should tell ex about her, and what effect on ex do you think that would have ? l'm thinking it'll either slam the door shut and she could think well fk you then. Orrrr, if she is reconsidering, fire things up a bit and that'd be the only way with her l would reconsider myself because l'm not even gonna think about ruining what l have now , for wishy washy. Any ideas, thoughts, appreciated. Edited January 14, 2019 by chillii Link to post Share on other sites
darkmoon Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 these two must not know about each other you are playing with fire if they do you must pick who you prefer Link to post Share on other sites
Nukem Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 (edited) How old is your GF, is it likely she asking you to have children? Would you like to have more children since your daughter is grown up? Is your ex willing to change countries again? Personally, I don like lying or not saying everything. I would prefer to stay with current GF. Decide quickly Edited January 14, 2019 by Nukem Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 I think it may be telling that you are even considering reconciliation. Link to post Share on other sites
FMW Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 More importantly, I think your current girlfriend would probably like to know you are thinking about the possibility of reconciliation with your ex. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author chillii Posted January 14, 2019 Author Share Posted January 14, 2019 Yeah, l know , l feel bad in every direction believe me. My gf is 49 too , she's got one son so we're both right for kids l'm 50s. She knows l was still a little emotional about ex earlier, and she's been very understanding and patient. Ex sort of seemed to hint around things changing and moving possibilities but l didn't dig at all on anything us, kinda avoided it actually because of my sitch and we just chit chatted really but there was still bits and pieces came through among it. Damn , l dunno, shyt ! Link to post Share on other sites
MetallicHue Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 I think you need to make up your mind - you don’t want to string your current gf along. That is unfair to her. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 You should tell her you're with someone else now and happy with her and not going to jeopardize that. I mean, she's been off with another man or men. If she has any ethics and if she really cares about you, she won't WANT you to mess up what you have and should get on with her life, and then if you both end up single at the same time in the future, take a run at each other. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SevenCity Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 You are considering leaving your current gf due to a phone call. Not saying you are bad but it really says something about how much you value the relationship. You’re on the price is right and deciding whether to trade cash in hand for the mystery prize behind door number 2. I would be very weary of a woman who left only to find the grass wasn’t greener. So bottom line is are you willing to give up your current gf for a maybe chance things will work out with the ex? Answer depends on how much you value your current rl. As far as telling, no, I wouldn’t mention chit to either. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted January 15, 2019 Share Posted January 15, 2019 Current gf is the rebound basically. Now the "real" gf is back on the scene, it is too good a chance to miss... Current gf is great, she is fantastic, but I guess not as great and fantastic as the one he lost... Link to post Share on other sites
Author chillii Posted January 15, 2019 Author Share Posted January 15, 2019 (edited) Well it'd sound like that but nope she wasn't at all.l wasn't looking for something new or a rebound l didn't need one. But when she popped up there was just too much going to walk away from, l knew l needed time but if she was ok with that then l was too. But no not just a phone call it'd take a lot more than that we've just talked here and there.Just talked, nothing going on. And no she doesn't screw around and she's not interested in screwing round she's old school italian. But there was this one thought to be special guy that turned up , she tried , who could blame her. She didn't just dump us it tore her up but we just couldn't see another way we'd given it 2yrs, l didn't wanna waste anymore of her life or mine either. PS, l know , l have to sort my crap out. Edited January 15, 2019 by chillii 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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