Date in hospital/after hospital

[ShaunaN]

I think all this has caught up with me, I don't feel well at all I want to throw up and I feel so cold.

[mark clemson]

It's too bad but it's also probably better to play it safe. Also gives you more time to prep if there's additional stuff to be done. Also less chance you'll have to rush him to a hospital unexpectedly.

 

Just trying to look on the bright side here. It's too bad but lots of silver linings, I think.

 

[Edit] Just saw your last post. Time to get some rest I think...

[ShaunaN]

I hope so. I just want it all to be over. Ste wants to be home and I want him home too.

 

I'm tucked up in bed. Hope this clears overnight.

[fishlips]

Oh Sweetie, I've lurked here for a while and followed your thread. I created an account so I could offer some support with the others. You and your husband seem like wonderful people. He is lucky to have you. None of us can control the future, so just hang in there and do your best to help him. Hopefully, he will recover and put this behind him.

 

Best of luck to you and your husband. I hope he comes home soon!

[ShaunaN]

Oh Sweetie, I've lurked here for a while and followed your thread. I created an account so I could offer some support with the others. You and your husband seem like wonderful people. He is lucky to have you. None of us can control the future, so just hang in there and do your best to help him. Hopefully, he will recover and put this behind him.

 

Best of luck to you and your husband. I hope he comes home soon!

 

Thank you.

 

They've said he can't come home tomorrow They now won't give me a date.

 

Ste is down and nothing I can say will cheer him up. I feel worthless that I can't help him

[ShaunaN]

I feel like I've given up.

 

I feel so low its unreal.

 

I'm a bad wife. I feel I'm letting him down

[amaysngrace]

None of this is your fault Shauna. He can’t come home because the doctors decided it’s best if he stay there.

 

It doesn’t make you a bad wife, it just makes them good doctors.

 

How’ve you been feeling otherwise? Did you rest and get your strength back?

[ShaunaN]

None of this is your fault Shauna. He can’t come home because the doctors decided it’s best if he stay there.

 

It doesn’t make you a bad wife, it just makes them good doctors.

 

How’ve you been feeling otherwise? Did you rest and get your strength back?

 

I've not been going as much this week as I've been cleaning the house. I'm still not myself but I'll be going tonight, spend the night there. His best friend has been there. SO he hasn't been alone

 

I just don't feel like I'm a good wife or make him happy.

 

I feel really low today. Not been eating properly either.

[BaileyB]

I feel like I've given up.

 

I feel so low its unreal.

 

I'm a bad wife. I feel I'm letting him down

 

OMG. You really NEED to stop doing this...

 

You remind me of my coworker, who cares for all her sick family members until she is literally exhausted, physically sick, and emotionally destroyed. And yet, she refuses to accept any offers to help because SHE needs to be the one to be needed and she needs to have all the praise/appreciation.

 

She went to counselling, and the counsellor told her that she needed to learn how to do self-care and set better boundaries in her life. She still refuses to do that, and she is currently on stress leave - suffering a major depressive episode but still running back and forth between homes, caring for all her sick family members...

 

As someone who has stood in your shoes, I will tell you again... take care of yourself. And stop being so hard on yourself - you are doing the best you can and your best is good enough. It’s a terrible situation, you really need to give yourself a break.

[amaysngrace]

It’s understandable that you’re low. You were expecting him to come home.

 

Are you taking proper vitamins to make sure you’re getting the nutrients you need? You can’t neglect your health.

 

Can you draw a hot bath? Maybe that would help you feel better. I hope the day gets better for you.

[ShaunaN]

It’s understandable that you’re low. You were expecting him to come home.

 

Are you taking proper vitamins to make sure you’re getting the nutrients you need? You can’t neglect your health.

 

Can you draw a hot bath? Maybe that would help you feel better. I hope the day gets better for you.

 

I've got some vitamins and such. I've had a radox bath and getting ready to spend the night with him. The take away and trashy TV night we were going to have would just need to be in the hospital.

 

I've got lots on my mind, Ste is a big one, but I can't control what happens. What made me snap today. He has these two models and I kind of think I broke one of them. Its a plane and one of the engines has come off. Ste's going to be mad at me.

[amaysngrace]

Crazy glue fixes mostly everything.

 

Glad you pampered yourself some. Go and have a good night!

[BaileyB]

What made me snap today. He has these two models and I kind of think I broke one of them. Its a plane and one of the engines has come off. Ste's going to be mad at me.

 

Crazy glue does fix everything. Try not to worry... If anything, having been through the experience you have usually shows you pretty clearly what is important in life, and what is not. Sure, he may be disappointed but in the bigger picture, it probably won’t matter to him now.

 

I hope you have a nice night with him. I’m sorry he wasn’t able to come home as planned.

[ShaunaN]

I'll be honest I get sick of the sight of the same hospital room. I wonder what goes through his head.

 

I'll own up to him, I don't want to try and repair it and break it more.

[amaysngrace]

It has to be very hard to be in the same hospital room all day every day. Do they have him getting out of bed and doing physical therapy? Is the weather nice? Is there a place to sit outside?

[ShaunaN]

It has to be very hard to be in the same hospital room all day every day. Do they have him getting out of bed and doing physical therapy? Is the weather nice? Is there a place to sit outside?

 

Outside isn't very nice, the gardens look bare and the only time he gets out the room when I've been there is for physio.

 

However apparently he has gone for a walk before and the nurses have been worried. Ste would say he went to the chippy across the road or to the shop.

 

The nurses try and ban him from these walks the horrid nurse has even gone as far as hooking him up to a drip. The other nurses get he wants a change of scene. He makes references to being a kid again, but he won't expand on it.

Edited April 6, 2019 by ShaunaN

[ShaunaN]

Positive note

 

I'm sneaking some plates to the hospital. We are having Chinese/Indian food. We will eat too much. I'm getting sick of eating from cartons.

[ShaunaN]

Feeling a bit better today, nurses have left us alone so we're watching the boat race in bed.

[FMW]

Happy to hear that. I know you want him home, but for right now enjoy your time together no matter where you are. As the saying goes, life is what happens while you're busy making other plans.

[ShaunaN]

Happy to hear that. I know you want him home, but for right now enjoy your time together no matter where you are. As the saying goes, life is what happens while you're busy making other plans.

 

Sadly we've had to put plan making on hold

[ShaunaN]

Our plans for tonight

 

Eat indian food.

[ShaunaN]

Ste broke down last night. This place reminds him of his childhood. I said how and he told me some bits. The bits he told me was horrific. He said he still has nightmares about one place. The room reminds him of that place.

 

He wasn't making a lot of sense. I might talk to his best friend see what is going on.

[elaine567]

Ste broke down last night.

 

He wasn't making a lot of sense. I might talk to his best friend see what is going on.

 

Tell the doctors too

.

[amaysngrace]

That’s why he didn’t want to talk about it. Poor buddy.

 

Hopefully the weather breaks soon and he can get outside more if he has to stay there. Can you do things to the room to make it more homey and less stark for him? Will they allow that?

[ShaunaN]

The doctors gave him something to calm him down. They suggested when possible he should go outside into the gardens.

 

As for the rooms. Ste says he doesn't have a lot of friends. It seems he has a lot of airline friends. He has a lot of things from airlines. I got some towels from one airline. I might put it up on the wall just so it breaks things up. I don't know how long they are going to keep him in so I don't know how far to go.

 

I rang his best friend, we met for a coffee whilst Ste was asleep. It appears they've known each other practically all their lives (Ste is 31!). I asked about the room. She said in one home they were in it was like a prison, Ste was often locked in a room as a "punishment" and she used to let him out and he took so many punishments and he used to get beat up by the other residents. She also explained that she had saved up to buy Ste a model plane one year and someone destroyed it, when they pinned him down and broke it in front of him. He apparently still has this plane. missing its tail which they took. That room reminds him of all this.

 

Apparently there is a lot more. She explained that they have a special bond and relationship and she knows he loves me a lot and when he is ready he will let me in to that part of his life. Its not her place to say without Ste's say so.

 

If you look at Ste and his best friend you can't tell they were subject to the care system I said this to her, She said thats thanks to Ste's adoptive parents. taking him in and fostering her.