lolita888 Posted January 30, 2019 Share Posted January 30, 2019 (edited) Due to what happened to me I ended up reading a lot of posts from married people here who ended up having an affair. People who stayed with their h/w even if they are no longer sleeping together or love each other. And people who became the OW or OM. My question to those who had an affair and no longer sleep with their w/h- despite being married, do you still wear your wedding ring or take good care of it (removing it when doing some chores)? Does your w/h know of your A or do you keep it a secret? And to the OW/OM does your mm/mw still wear their wedding ring? Edited January 30, 2019 by lolita888 Link to post Share on other sites
Naivewomen Posted January 30, 2019 Share Posted January 30, 2019 My MM never took his off. I took mine off for 7 months. You can tell who was more invested. Link to post Share on other sites
eastdean Posted January 30, 2019 Share Posted January 30, 2019 I took mine off when with OW. She knew I was M (as was she). I think this was symbolic of my momentary departures from the M. I never saw OW wear her rings, but that made sense as she was planning to split from him (ours was an exit A for her). Link to post Share on other sites
Naivewomen Posted January 30, 2019 Share Posted January 30, 2019 @east dean. How long was your affair? Did u fall in love with her? Link to post Share on other sites
Lov3foo1 Posted January 31, 2019 Share Posted January 31, 2019 Mine was off months before my affair, I didn’t realize I had subconsciously started checking out of my marriage. I had it back on after my H found out about my affair, and we were in marriage repair mode. I took it off about 6 weeks after. We are now separated. Link to post Share on other sites
darkbloom Posted January 31, 2019 Share Posted January 31, 2019 He always has his on. It freaks me out. Especially when he touches me with that hand or holds my hand. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lotus_Luna Posted January 31, 2019 Share Posted January 31, 2019 Neither one of us wear ours. I’ve seen him with it twice in 7 years. It was after our break up, when they were together. It was like he was trying really hard to get back into the relationship. I think she asked him to... He tried twice, then away with the ring and the act that they’re ‘okay’.. Link to post Share on other sites
eastdean Posted January 31, 2019 Share Posted January 31, 2019 @Naivewomen: about 2 years, and yes. Link to post Share on other sites
Naivewomen Posted February 1, 2019 Share Posted February 1, 2019 @east dean. I'm sorry. It hurts and is so very painful. I'm in recovery but have a long way to go. Seems like it's getting lighter but I am still in trauma. Link to post Share on other sites
TheRainbow Posted February 2, 2019 Share Posted February 2, 2019 I am ashamed to say I still wore my wedding ring because my affair took place at work, and everyone knew I was married. My xOM didn't, and I didn't know he was married until after our affair ended. Link to post Share on other sites
Scarlet2 Posted February 2, 2019 Share Posted February 2, 2019 MM didn’t wear his ring when he was with me, always left it in his vehicle, on his on volition. I would only see him wearing it when he was working. At one point, I noticed he had a new ring but I never got the chance to ask him about it because I didn’t want to bring it up when other people were around and I couldn’t figure out how to nonchalantly ask when we were alone either since he wasn’t wearing it. I assume he had another “I’m leaving” rant with his wife, threw it and lost it, and had to get a new one when he changed his mind, again. Link to post Share on other sites
Missinghim17 Posted February 3, 2019 Share Posted February 3, 2019 Im single so I don't have a ring, but my MM always kept his on. It kind of bothers me. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted February 3, 2019 Share Posted February 3, 2019 I got married in 1993, paid $2,500 for her diamond ring and my gold band. we divorced in 1997. Fast fwd to 2011. I needed some ca$h so I went back to the same jeweler and he gave me $1,200 for the pair 1 Link to post Share on other sites
jah526 Posted February 3, 2019 Share Posted February 3, 2019 Im single so I don't have a ring, but my MM always kept his on. It kind of bothers me. Same here, except when he went to the gym. Said it rubbed against his finger when lifting weights. Not so sure I believe that story, especially since he was trying to pick up a trainer there, and god knows who else. Link to post Share on other sites
Whoknew30 Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 I only took mine off during a separation but only so my H couldn’t take it...bc it’s a fantastic ring & is to go to one of our children/grandchildren later on & had we’d divided I wasn’t going to Allyson it go to anyone but one of “my” children. In my opinion, who cares. The only reason someone would take off their ring is not to upset the person they’re having an affair with...not bc it has some deep meaning of not wanting to be with their spouse. This is one of those things that OM/OW look way yo into for some actual meaning. It doesn’t mean anything minus they didn’t want to ruin that particular sex session. Link to post Share on other sites
Prudence V Posted February 7, 2019 Share Posted February 7, 2019 And to the OW/OM does your mm/mw still wear their wedding ring? He didn’t. He hated it and never wore it. He hadn’t wanted one - sad he didn’t like rings. Since we got M, he never takes his ring I gave him off. So clearly it wasn’t rings he disliked. Link to post Share on other sites
Otter2569 Posted February 8, 2019 Share Posted February 8, 2019 I got married in 1993, paid $2,500 for her diamond ring and my gold band. we divorced in 1997. Fast fwd to 2011. I needed some ca$h so I went back to the same jeweler and he gave me $1,200 for the pair Same. I think I sold back my wedding ring in less than a year. I had mixed emotions about getting rid of it but it was meaning less and was part of moving on....and I never looked back! At least you were smart enough to ask for your engagement ring back!! Link to post Share on other sites
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