Redhead14 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) 'I’ve been around his mother and family." That doesn't mean they are telling you all their "biness" . . . and they shouldn't be. "I will say that I find it weird that his family and I aren’t friends on anything like social media and he’s not friends with mine." THAT'S WHAT YOU FIND WEIRD ABOUT ALL THIS????? Wow. Besides that, why would they be "friends" with some girl that's only been around a couple of months and they know isn't likely to be around much longer . . . or if she is, is only going to be part of more and probably bigger drama? Now that you've pretty much said that you live there too, I'm questioning his mother's parenting and decision-making skills and fear for her grandchild and you . . . If I were you, I'd be running so fast their heads would spin. This is not a healthy environment for a child or you. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 14, 2019 Author Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) I will guarantee you that his mother has full custody of that child now and she is required to be present at all times when her son is at home. I am certain that the home is well scrutinized by officials. There's a lot going on behind the scenes here that I suspect you are not privy to. 'I’ve been around his mother and family." <snip> Whoa whoa I was only saying I found it weird because his son and family were friends with the crazy ex on social media that’s all but I believe she blocked them. And I also mentioned that my family hasn’t tried to get to know him either. Or added him on anything. And I do not live there either. Never said I did. Ever. I only said that I’m always around. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Truncate quote Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) Sorry, "I'm always around. Always" at least suggested living there. But so what? This is a screwed up situation and you don't need all the drama and BS that must go on. "And I also mentioned that my family hasn’t tried to get to know him either." Why would they want to get to know a 32 year old convicted sex offender who has to wear and ankle bracelet and "dating" their 20 year old daughter or niece or granddaughter? I'd bet they are hoping he will be gone before they do get to know him or have to participate in raising his offspring. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
notbroken Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 This guy is bad for you. So much baggage. Baggage that has serious legal ramifications. Proceed at your own risk. Serious risk. Can't make it plainer than that. You denying it is not going to make it false. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 I understand that you do your best as a mother to raise your kids and then you have to let them go and hope that you’ve given them what they need to be successful... But, if my son was a teenage father, was a convicted sex offender, and moved his 20 year old girlfriend into my home... I can’t help but think that I had really failed at life. Emily, he at least has the good sense to know now that you need to be of legal age... at least, he has learned that much (hopefully). But, he is essentially doing with you what he did that for him into trouble in the first place. Do you not see this? There is naivity, and then there is stupidity. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 14, 2019 Author Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) I do not live there as I’ve stated. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) If you are there as often as you claim which is "Always" . . . even if you're not living there, it's still too much time there. You are a young woman who should be out going to fun places with her friends, having a nice life not couped up at some guy's house all the time embroiled in drama. I'm kinda wondering how long his mother will tolerate having you laying around her house all the time as in "always" anyway. Odd as this sounds, this guy is too old for you but pretty soon YOU are going to be too old for HIM Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 14, 2019 Author Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) His ex (scorned one) is 28 his ex before her 27. They’re both gorgeous and he stayed with them for years. The scorned one he’s known for about 6 years. The other was with him for about 1 1/2. To say he just dates younger girls is not fair. Or are you guys implying that we aren’t even dating. And he has told me he is the owner of that home Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 Sometimes you just can't save someone from themselves. The harsh reality is that there are winners and losers in the game of Life. Some are just bound to be losers. Maybe they will learn from their mistakes and make better choices. Or perhaps they won't, and the course of their life will reflect their poor choices. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Wallysbears Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 This guy is a loser. He's never going to amount to much. You have your entire life ahead of you. Don't shack up and waste your youth with a loser. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 Sometimes you just can't save someone from themselves. Ain’t that the truth. If he has dated these other women for long periods of time it is simply an example that some women make poor choices and put up with far too much from the men that they “love...” Consider women who form relationships with men while they are in prison for violent offences... some people just don’t use the good sense that God gave them. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 His ex (scorned one) is 28 his ex before her 27. They’re both gorgeous and he stayed with them for years. The scorned one he’s known for about 6 years. The other was with him for about 1 1/2. To say he just dates younger girls is not fair. Or are you guys implying that we aren’t even dating. And he has told me he is the owner of that home Ok, so he's 4 years older than the scorned one. He's known her since she was 22 and he was 26 and was with her for 5 or 6 years. He was released from jail in June of 2018 (with an ankle bracelet). She got older during the 5 or 6 years, right? And, then, SURPRISE, he is convicted of statutory rape - sex with a younger girl. He "cheated" on her by raping an underaged girl. Even if he claims that he didn't know she was underaged, I doubt very much he didn't realize she was very, very young at least. Apart from that, he was cheating on the scorned one. Look where the "ride or die" attitude got the scorned woman . . . while he was "on and off" with her, he ends up in jail for being with a younger girl (raped), she apparently tried to be "loyal" to him while he was in prison and be supportive to his family and now he's trashing her?????? She's so lucky -- she's dodging a giant bullet. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 14, 2019 Author Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) Yeah he was with her while he was away in prison but I wouldn’t say she supported his family THAT much. She help get them tickets to fly to visit their family in another country And supposedly drove an hour from her house to his so that his mother could speak with him on the phone. Because at one point he could only call the scorned one. But that’s it. Idk what she did that made his family turn on her tho. I just know he told me they don’t like her. When he came home she started being crazy and possessive and he broke up with her. She wasn’t wanting him to be on social media or anything and trying to control everything he does. So he dumped her. She was trying to be his mom and that’s not what he wanted. She’s very immature and controlling. He ALWAYS told her that if she didn’t act the way she acts they’d be together. Even when she found out about me after she sent him a nasty text he told her things are the way they are because of how she acts. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post; paragraphs Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 14, 2019 Share Posted February 14, 2019 (edited) OH, PALEEZE. Why wouldn't she keep good tabs on him? The guy raped a girl while he was "with her" and friggin ended up in jail! You bet she's gonna be all over his stupid as* and watch him like a hawk and rightly so. She didn't trust him!!!! Trust needs to be earned and once it's lost, it's extremely difficult to get again. When you catch him messing around with some younger side piece and he tells you he's sorry and he'll never do it again, you won't be all over him every single second of every day????? "Idk what she did that made his family turn on her tho." -- Yeah, great question. The answer is . . . they are listening to an believing his bullsh*t stories just like you are. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 15, 2019 Author Share Posted February 15, 2019 (edited) I know that whatever it was eventually she wasn’t allowed to come over anymore or his mom didn’t want her there or something because when she went ballistic when she found out about us she sent him this..... If they didn’t like me it should’ve ended there. From the beginning. Like don’t ever talk to me if you’ve never liked me. As much as you’ve done to me, my mother would still treat you with kindness. And you could walk right in her front door. Because she is a kind person. If I was soooo bad then why were you even talking to me from jail? Did that cross their minds? They shouldn’t have taken plane tickets from me if they did not like me. You don’t act nice or cordial to someone because you need them then treat them like trash because you don’t need them anymore. That’s using. And that’s probably where you got that from. You don’t do that to people. I copied and pasted the text I found from her to him it was in his whatsapp That’s the type of things she sends every once in awhile. IMO that’s harassment. He doesn’t want you so move on. And why do you keep using “rape” ? Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 Emily. Good luck. You are obviously a very mature woman with lots of experience and know exactly what you are doing, you are making great choices for yourself and your future. You do not need any advice because in all of your wisdom you have it figured out. Sounds like you have managed to land yourself a real catch of a man, I am sure everything is either proud or jealous of you. Honestly I don't know why you bother arguing on the internet, your time is better spent living the dream that you have apparently achieved. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted February 15, 2019 Author Share Posted February 15, 2019 (edited) I asked for help with HER . But everyone seems to think she’s the winner here Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Redact quote of prior post Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 (edited) And why do you keep using “rape” ? Because that is what he did!!!! Sex with a minor is called statutory rape. He is a child molester, a pedophile, a rapist, a pariah. Don't you get it yet???? Seriously! Ugh. This whole story is completely disgusting. I'm so sorry you're involved in it. All we can do here is wish you the best but we know it won't be a nice life for you if you stick with this guy. Even if you end up moving on, wasting even a few months on this guy is too much time wasted. I feel so sorry for his son most of all. It can't be easy for him at school with a pedophile for a father. He's gonna have a hard time the older he gets too. Edited February 15, 2019 by Redhead14 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 OK but any man delving into "young" territory, needs to be on his guard. I found when I was a teenager/early twenties it was very easy to "age" others around my own age very accurately, so all this "Oh I didn't know she was that young" is I guess a bit disingenuous... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 This guy was in his late 20s when he had his "encounter" and he is now 32 years old dating a 20 year old. The guy is into young girls. Don't pee on my leg and tell me it's raining. Young girls and a pee reference. Are we talking about R. Kelly? Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 (edited) Young girls and a pee reference. Are we talking about R. Kelly? No, I wasn't thinking about him, but now that you mention it, it's kinda ironic that the OPs "boyfriend" "makes music" too, and is a DJ according to the OP. :lmao: If the whole situation weren't so tragic, I'd think it was a joke or some kind of Netflix original -- Trailer Trash Chronicles. The OP deserves so much better than all this. I hope she eventually sees this for herself. Edited February 15, 2019 by Redhead14 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 I asked for help with HER . But everyone seems to think she’s the winner here Nobody thinks she's a winner. However, there's nothing you can do in respect to her choices. That's between your boyfriend and her. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 First of all 20 is LEGAL. My mother passed away. I live with my dad Does your dad know him? Is he aware of the relationship? Sorry for your loss, losing a parent isn't easy.. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 OP, what does your dad think of this relationship? Does he know who this guy is, exactly? With due respect, have you not dated much before this? I am wondering if you involve yourself with this type of guy because you don't really know that you can do better and that higher-quality men are out there. The one you're dating now is bottom-of-the-barrel. His ex isn't really the issue here. You are going to learn that the hard way, I fear. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted February 15, 2019 Share Posted February 15, 2019 (edited) I asked for help with HER . But everyone seems to think she’s the winner here" You asked for help with her and we recognized right away that your problem isn't her. You have a much bigger issue and you don't seem to realize it. The truth is that it is not your problem to deal with her. That is between the two of them. If he has a problem with it, he needs to handle it by himself. It really isn't any of your business. You've only been seeing this guy a couple of months. You are not married to him or even engaged. Grown men don't usually want a woman to interfere or try to manage his problems. They might grumble about the problems once in a while, but they don't want a woman to "save" them. And, if this guy puts you in the middle or suggests that you do anything, then he's an even bigger hose bag than I think. Everyone thinks she's the winner??? You sure as heck aren't. This guy is no prize. None of the women who who have responded here would touch this guy with a 10 foot pole. And, there are a couple of guys who responded who think the guy is a creep too. Edited February 19, 2019 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Fixed quote Link to post Share on other sites
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