BaileyB Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 Oh Emily, at this point not even your youth is a good excuse for your ignorance anymore... Listen to your father. Let it go. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 If he loves her so much? Wouldn’t he be torturing himself not being with her ? First, your father is spot on correct. Second . . . because SHE doesn't want him probably (yet). He's a POS and she knows it. SHE's trying to be done with him. He doesn't get to "decide" whether he's with her. She has to want him back also. It's too soon after that "break up" to be able to be confident that those two will not get back together again. It happens all the friggin' time. Read the other forums here, like the Break Ups section. It's not a good idea to date sex offenders or people who have recently gotten out of a relationship -- for sure, within 6 months, or men who are 12 years older with children and no secure/quality of future. We told you to forget about the Ex because you needed to focus on YOU and pay attention to what was going on (or not going on) between you and him. It wasn't really any of your business anyway. He wasn't treating you like a girlfriend or a woman he cared about. You knew it, you just didn't want to face it. You gotta get real with yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 17, 2019 Share Posted March 17, 2019 Oh Emily, at this point not even your youth is a good excuse for your ignorance anymore... Listen to your father. Let it go. BaileyB, you said it perfectly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 He's a POS and she knows it. SHE's trying to be done with him. She has to want him back After speaking to one of his friends and one of his family members I found out some very sad and mean news about the entire situation. I know the whole story now. Basically he dated the ex (I’m not calling her scorned anymore) since she was 22 or 23 like around that age. I think he was like 26 or 27 at the time. They met at work they worked for an airline (i knew that already tho) They had a HUGE falling out during their first year and broke up for about 4 months. During that time he told Their coworkers nasty rumors about her and after that everyone at work didn’t like her and treated her mean. They got back together but because of the nasty things he told everyone she was treated very mean by their coworkers. Supposedly everyone thought she was stalking him and was obsessed with him. Really he was secretly seeing her. But never like I guess owned up to his feelings for her. His cousin told me he would text her things like he loves and misses her and when she said it back he’d pretend it was a mistake saying it. His friend told me that some people caught on to the fact that he was lying and but mostly everyone else spread rumors and made fun of her. He got fired when he was convicted for his crime. I believe she left about a year after. She told someone it was too “toxic” there for her. Supposedly while in jail he started sending her letters “owning up” to his mistakes and saying he’s gonna treat her better. It was during that time she got close with his family and started speaking with him on the phone a lot. I think he was telling her how much he wanted to change. Then when he came home they WERE dating or he would tell her they’re gonna work on them and give it a shot. But kept cheating on her. And his family started to be mean to her. Someone mentioned she complained a lot about him wanting to hang out with his friends and not her when no one but her supported him. His cousin mentioned his son unfollowed her on Instagram randomly. (I wonder what he tells people so that they hate her so much). Then came me (and now I feel really bad ): ) which pushed her over the edge. But the meanest thing I heard was that she got hired at a new place in the airport and people from the airline they worked at went to her new job and complained and told her new manager that she is trouble and had someone fired from their old job (the SO), they said things like she went to Hunan Resources on him. That manager was good friends with someone from the airline and she got fired a few days ago I believe. I feel so bad for her now. And his cousin told me the SO stepdad recently blocked her from Facebook. And i was told she didn’t try and contact anyone or anything to deserve it. So why would they do that to her. Like block her and torture her. And to make matters worse.... HE still hasn’t blocked her. Idk if it’s cause he betrayed ME that I feel bad but I really do feel really bad. Like what does he tell people for them to hate her? Why would his stepdad block her after all this time? His cousin kept saying “I feel bad for that girl”. The stepdad blocking her RECENTLY bothers me because WHY would they do that? Especially if HE hasn’t. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 So why would they do that to her. Like block her and torture her. As we have been trying to tell you Emily, he is a bad guy. And, he hangs out with other bad people. This kind of behavior is completely unacceptable. It is immature, mean, and hurtful. Have you heard enough to leave this man. Because, if they can treat her this way, they will treat you this way.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 Have you heard enough to leave this man. Because, if they can treat her this way, they will treat you this way.... He ghosted me like a week or so ago. I just feel REALLY bad because I feel like I played a part in being mean to her. And I don’t really understand why he treats her that way instead of admitting feelings for her. Why tell everyone you hate her then sneak her in your home. He WANTED to see her. And he also wants everyone to hate. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 He ghosted me like a week or so ago. I just feel REALLY bad because I feel like I played a part in being mean to her. And I don’t really understand why he treats her that way instead of admitting feelings for her. Why tell everyone you hate her then sneak her in your home. He WANTED to see her. And he also wants everyone to hate. It could be that he is controlling and possessive so he makes it difficult for her to have friends and socialize, etc. Isolating a partner is a manipulative tool for making sure that a wife/girlfriend feel like she doesn't have much choice but to stay with them. It limits her options. Either way, this is one bad dude and you should count yourself lucky. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 It could be that he is controlling and possessive so he makes it difficult for her to have friends and socialize, etc. Isolating a partner is a manipulative tool for making sure that a wife/girlfriend feel like she doesn't have much choice but to stay with them. . No I mean him making everyone hate her but then he secretly wants to speak to her. Like making his family hate her but sneaking her in his home. Why do that to himself? Why make it hard to see her if you secretly care for her? I understand why he lied to ME . But why make EVERYONE hate her? Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 (edited) No I mean him making everyone hate her but then he secretly wants to speak to her. Like making his family hate her but sneaking her in his home. Why do that to himself? Why make it hard to see her if you secretly care for her? I understand why he lied to ME . But why make EVERYONE hate her? He's a manipulative jerk PERIOD. He's manipulating his family and he's manipulating her. He's two-faced. He tells her he's going to sneak her in, inspite of his family so she thinks he's crazy about her enough to do that for her. He's a snake and he will twist and wind around everyone and everything. In the end, everything is about him and serves him in some way trust me. Edited March 20, 2019 by Redhead14 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 He's a manipulative jerk PERIOD. He's manipulating his family and he's manipulating her. He's two-faced. He tells her he's going to sneak her in, inspite of his family so she thinks he's crazy about her enough to do that for her. . Yeah but .... i feel like I was a pawn in his game of harassing her. I feel extremely stupid right now. Like I DO feel like he wants to to torture and harass her. I just wish I understood why. You hate her? Why not leave here Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 Yeah but .... i feel like I was a pawn in his game of harassing her. I feel extremely stupid right now. Like I DO feel like he wants to to torture and harass her. I just wish I understood why. You hate her? Why not leave here Emily, you are too young to really understand what bad people are capable of and why they do what they do. The guy has a plan. He's manipulating her for some reason, some kind of revenge perhaps. We can't know for sure. What we do know is that no good will come of all this and you need to stay very far away from it all. You do not want to be involved. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 some kind of revenge perhaps. I shouldn’t warn her? Or apologize to her. Why is it ok to watch a family torture a girl? Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 I shouldn’t warn her? Or apologize to her. Why is it ok to watch a family torture a girl? No you should not attempt to interfere in any way. For one reason, if she's not as intelligent as we thought she was and is continuing to see this guy, she needs to learn that lesson the hard way because clearly the those 6 years and several break ups didn't do it. And, you aren't on her list of favorites, why would she believe you when you tell her he's trying to hose her? She'll be thinking you are the "scorned one" now trying to sabotage it. You also should not try to interfere in whatever this guy is trying to do because you may end up being a target yourself. Stay out of it which is what we've been telling you from the start of this thread. Stay out of THEIR business. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 20, 2019 Author Share Posted March 20, 2019 For one reason, if she's not as intelligent as we thought she was and is continuing to see this guy, she needs to learn that lesson the hard way because clearly the those 6 years and several break ups didn't do it. . You guys like make up your own conclusions. This entire post I’ve stated they DONT speak. And I don’t see how anyone would think they even have a chance because his family has blocked her on things and don’t like her Link to post Share on other sites
Amethyst68 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 I would just leave her, she is obviously aware of his treatment and dealing with it. What you're shared shows she is getting stronger. Concentrate on you, sooner or later this man will resurface, probably looking for more NSA sex. Do not let yourself be drawn back in. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 No I mean him making everyone hate her but then he secretly wants to speak to her. Like making his family hate her but sneaking her in his home. Why do that to himself? Why make it hard to see her if you secretly care for her? I understand why he lied to ME . But why make EVERYONE hate her? Why break the law and have sex with an underage girl? There are some questions, for which we do not have answers... because, it doesn’t make logical sense. What do we know about this guy - he’s not the brightest, he’s manipulative and dishonest, and he’s selfish and uses women for his own purpose. Not sure how anything he does would surprise you at this point... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 20, 2019 Share Posted March 20, 2019 You guys like make up your own conclusions. This entire post I’ve stated they DONT speak. And I don’t see how anyone would think they even have a chance because his family has blocked her on things and don’t like her So they don't speak when he's sneaking her into his home? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 21, 2019 Author Share Posted March 21, 2019 So they don't speak when he's sneaking her into his home? They don’t speak anymore. Of course they were speaking when he was sneaking her in because they were still involved. They haven’t been in months is what I mean Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted March 21, 2019 Share Posted March 21, 2019 Emily, you're giving this guy more of your brain space than he deserves. If there's one thing I have learned in my 50 odd years, it's that we will never truly understand what motivates another person to do what they did. Walk away from the lot of them and focus your attentions on the future. Link to post Share on other sites
Redhead14 Posted March 21, 2019 Share Posted March 21, 2019 . . . you're giving this guy more of your brain space . . . That's how I've been feeling about this thread, Basil I raised kids, been here done this and, yet, I can't help trying to stop a possible train wreck. With my own kids, who are in their 30's now, I learned to say how I feel about something and then leave it at their feet -- after that I am hoping for the best and preparing for the worst! I keep looking at this thread though. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Emilyperkins Posted March 23, 2019 Author Share Posted March 23, 2019 I raised kids, been here done this and, yet, I can't help trying to stop a possible train wreck. With my own kids, who are in their 30's now, I learned to say how I feel about something and then leave it at their feet -- after that I am hoping for the best and preparing for the worst! I keep looking at this thread though. I really do appreciate how much you care. I really do. I found out today he did a photo shoot with a girl who graduated high school last year! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted March 23, 2019 Share Posted March 23, 2019 I found out today he did a photo shoot with a girl who graduated high school last year! Are we surprised? Move on and never look back... Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 23, 2019 Share Posted March 23, 2019 Really? It's time to get over it. Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted March 24, 2019 Share Posted March 24, 2019 Are we surprised? No, we are not surprised... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted March 24, 2019 Share Posted March 24, 2019 In the nasty message she sent him yesterday telling him she’ll never love him again he’s “repulsive” to her. She pretty much welcomed him to block her on pretty much everything. She in so many words said “PLEASE block me on everything” saying she’s moved on. And he STILL hasn’t I'm surprised she didn't hit him with "I wanted to wipe my mouth every time you kissed me..." (paraphrasing a line from Bette Davis' first movie) Now, why do you think a grown man who has command and will of just about everything else in his life would not do this one simple thing? You click it, it's done--he doesn't even need to get dressed to do it. What does that say about your relationship with him that this one, simple action is just one step too far for him, but not you? HE is your problem, not her. It would appear she is quite clear and effective in her revulsion with him, as most sane women would be. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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