How do I fix this?

[Wiseman887]

I’ve made the worst mistake of my life leaving the girl I loved so much

We were dating for 9 months. She had an offer to a wonderful job but it was 2 hours away, we had a talk about it then I decided that she should just move forward and I would always be understanding because it was her dream job

So she moved away. We seen each other sometimes once a week, sometimes once a whole month and we started to grow a part, or at least I was.

Then here came the new girl I met at work, I felt like I was slowly falling for the new girl, so I talked to my gf less and less; we barely talked anymore but she still made efforts to send me gifts on my birthday, ordered me a cakes that delivered to my doors (it was a weekday she had to work so we couldn’t celebrate together) but for me that wasn’t enough, I needed a physical relationship and someone here with me.

So despite of her being lovely and thoughtful, I decided to bring it up to her. That day she came back to visit and stayed over for the night, I broke it off to her, and she was quiet, I didn’t know what she was thinking, she went quiet for a bit then she said okay and she thanks me for everything.

That night we slept in seperate room, the next morning I got up she has already left, her toothbrush that was there for months has already gone, her hair dryers, her everything. The house seems so empty, my heart aches for a bit but I had a bit of a relief feeling and I thought this could be better for both

We didn’t talk after that day

I started going out with the new girl, turns out that she wasn’t who she said she was, she is the complete opposite of me, she likes to do things her way without considering my feelings, we eat out where she likes or go to movies that she wants to see, we were just constantly arguing about lot of stuffs.

And that moment I realised that, I missed my ex so much.

I’ve had her heavily on my mind for days so I decided to call her. Lucky she picked up, I asked how she’s been and everything is alright for her and hows she feeling after the breakup because I realised that I’ve never considered her feelings and never asked if she was okay.

She answered everything quiet clear and short, she did take a bit of time to answer everything I asked tho. Then I heard some heavy breathing from her, like she was crying but didn’t want me to hear. I felt so bad I hurt her. She refused to remain friends and didn’t want to share much of what’s been happening with her. And she did say if thats all then don’t contact her again. She just seems so distant and like she wasn’t her anymore.

She used to text me everyday, telling me everything happening during the day, or used to tell me to go to bed if its too late but I always said to her I’m an adult I can decide when to sleep and don’t like anyone forcing me to. She said sorry and she didn’t mean that, from then she never told me that its late I need to sleep anymore. She is a type of person that will hide her pain, and you don’t need to tell her twice about something. I feel like with me leaving her she wouldn’t take me back

She doesn’t seem to hate me much but she doesn’t want to be friends or doesn’t show up anywhere near me, she is completely out of my life now

How do I reach out to her? I’ve missed her so much and I regretted everything I done to hurt her

[Marc878]

What did you expect? You moved on and she had no other choice.

 

It's over. Things said can never be unsaid.

 

She is doing the smart thing for herself. No contact.

 

You didn't care that much for her or you wouldn't have dumped her. Now you're looking back and wanting what you can't have. Nostalgic feelings are fleeting. Chances are if you got back together this would happen again so she's guarding herself from more hurt.

[preraph]

Look, even if she agreed to resume, you're two hours away and you admittedly are one of those "out of sight, out of mind" guys and will only keep looking for a local woman to be physical with. So just accept that it's over and move on and don't hurt her again. Just work on finding another local to date.