hamids47 Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 (edited) first of all I apologize for my english.I am 50 my ex wife is 40 .Me and her 10 months were together .sometimes 5 hours per day with phone.sometimes we had sex but not vaginal. SHe always said I love you so much. 80 days ago we married .just 3 days after marriage she said she likes me but she can not make me happy. she said she was crying had anxiety and she had low Appetite and sleep.she said 25 days ago that she made her decision and wanted to be separated.I asked her why ? she said again she can not make me happy and she said a few unnecessary reasons for separation .we separated .We did not even fight once. I'm still thinking about breaking it out.is it possible Maybe she has a mental illness ? Edited February 10, 2019 by hamids47 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 Need more info. Why no vaginal sex? Did you ever have vaginal sex with her? Why does she feel like she can't make you happy? Link to post Share on other sites
Cersei Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 Are you 2 from the same country or did she move to be with you? Link to post Share on other sites
Ronni_W Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 Maybe she has a mental illness ? No; do not try to blame it on a 'mental illness' on her part. You got married without knowing each other, and, after getting married to you, she realized that you BOTH made a horrible mistake. How you two did it is NOT the way to go about deciding to spend the rest of your lives together. She properly realized this; don't try to make out that she's wrong. Just give her the divorce and be done with it. If you want to stay together, then that is mental illness on YOUR part. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted February 10, 2019 Share Posted February 10, 2019 I'm sorry this has happened. I too want to know why you didn't have vaginal sex before marriage. Was it because of beliefs or because of medical or what? It may be any number of things. But the low appetite and no sleep, she is telling you being together is making her very anxious and isn't right for her. It could be anything from she already has anxiety problems (though not necessarily) to she lost her attraction to she just feels marriage isn't for her. She said she can't make you happy. I have a feeling that's sexually, but correct me if I'm wrong. It just sounds like she made a mistake in marrying and has some issues. The reality of marriage is very different from just talking on the phone for hours, in which you can imagine the person is the person of your dreams, when they just are not and no one is. Only one way to go here, and that is to give her an annulment or divorce, whatever is easiest. Annulment may be possible. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 11, 2019 Share Posted February 11, 2019 She probably felt overwhelmed. I called one of my BFF's who happens to be a divorce lawyer from my honeymoon begging her to help me get out of the marriage. I was frightened & scared. That 1st year was tough. Talk to your wife. Listen to hear fears. Get a counselor to help but fight for your marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hamids47 Posted February 11, 2019 Author Share Posted February 11, 2019 she is virgin .bc of her beliefs She likes to have vaginal sex after our wedding I respected her. we just signed for being together legally .We celebrated it with the presence of our relatives ( about 80 guests ). she asked me to have wedding ceremony 1 year later. she constantly says she always likes me and even now she says likes me but she can not make me happy and she can not be a good women for me. I asked my mother to phone her why she wants to leave me...she said her he has Schizoid personality disorder ! my mother asked her how she realized that I have personality disorder ... she says she realized herself after seeing some strange behavior on me and search on net and she realized herself that I have Schizoid personality disorder and I might be schizophrenic in the future! and it will be very dangerous for her.she asked my mother not to tell me that I am Schizoid bc I will be upset. I am confusing bc why she said these things just 3 days after marriage. she had 10 months for knowing me and deciding to not marriage with me.If I really did behave abnormally It should be the psychiatrist's opinion and And not so she said just 1 day before marriage that she likes me very much and kissed me and did sex with me and just 3 days after marriage she said with crying that she can not makes me happy and wants to leave...Because of that I believe may be she has mental problem... something like Serious anxiety or adult ADHD... and saying the cause for leaving (Schizoid personality disorder ) is Just an excuse. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted February 11, 2019 Share Posted February 11, 2019 Maybe it was the sex? She didn't like it, it hurt and scared her? Or maybe she is gay? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 11, 2019 Share Posted February 11, 2019 Get the female relatives in her family to talk some sense into her. She's terrified of sex & Has self esteem issues. She thinks she is doing the honorable thing by releasing you when in fact all she is doing is hiding out of fear. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted February 11, 2019 Share Posted February 11, 2019 She definitely has some sort of problem and l think she's projecting. Did you look up schizoid personality? Basically it's an extreme inability to form attachments or lasting relationships. One of the criteria is a lack of desire for sex or intimacy. Not saying your wife has schizoid personality disorder but I really think she was trying to find out what is wrong with her when she stumbled across that info. She thinks she's the one who is personality disordered but she can't bear the thought so now she is going to project and say it's you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author hamids47 Posted February 12, 2019 Author Share Posted February 12, 2019 (edited) 2 weeks ago she forced me to separate her. She said if I did not come to sign a divorce she will ask her lawyer to make me engage in a complicated case. and it is better to separate from each other peacefully.she insisted she was in a hurry and did not want to be worn out of this time .He repeatedly threatened me to sign a divorce as soon as possible.While she was constantly saying, I love you! ultimately I signed it. about sex : some times we did sex chat she behaving on the back of the phone, which provoked me and made me to masturbate. When we slept together, I often made her orgasm by finger or by mouth she liked it sometimes she had 3 orgasms per every meeting. she liked to make me orgasm by non penetrating sex ways... but i didn`t orgasm .I have not problem with masturbating .and I have not problem with vaginal sex. Edited February 12, 2019 by hamids47 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 12, 2019 Share Posted February 12, 2019 Get your own lawyer & get her female relatives involved. She has serious hang ups regarding sex & they are causing her to make irrational decisions. Link to post Share on other sites
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