Angry my ex wife introducing new partner less than two weeks after seperation

[Neko88]

Ok so the story of how me and my wife seperated can be found in my previous threads. Unfortunately for me new things have come to light since I wrote them.

 

Just some updated information. I had a friend whom i worked with. We chatted about being dad's and the like. My wife one day began talking to him too and he became a mutual friend. He was a good bloke & he and his mrs were on about double dating with us. alls well. My only gripe was there chats were becoming excessive and they would talk alot. If I said anything about this my wife would blame my insecurities and yell at me to shut up.

 

He randomly blocks both my wife and I on social media i ask my wife if she knows why. She says no idea. OK never mind we move on.

 

Cut to a few days ago I see my now seperated wife is tagging this friend on Facebook (I'm still blocked) I said oh your talking to him again? But hes atill blocked me? She said yeah have been for ages. That she had been talking to him secretly whilst we were in counciling and that he was giving "good advice" - I'm sure he was.

 

My wife then tells me the reason he blocked us both originally was becuse she unloaded all our marital problems on him at the time. Then she tells me he recently split with his Mrs and then unblocked my wife to talk to her again which was around the time she seperated originally from me. I've also come to find he blocked all my family at my wife's request, so no one would see her tagging him in things, becuse she thought I'd be angry she's talking to him - normal eh?

 

Yesterday she tells me she's out with her mum and our daughter. The pictures she sends me are empty of her mum when normally she sticks to our daughter like glue. I enquire as i have a gut feeling shes with him and my wife tells me I'm crazy and that I've ruined her day accusing her of being with this guy. I double check with her mum who doesn't outright lie but bends the truth.

 

Then I recive a message from a mate of the guys profile pic. It's him and my daughter out the day my wife said she wasn't with him. My wife lied to me. Not that strange atm she does that alot. She's become quite decietful. However I'm more annoyed she lied whom my daughter was with.

 

Even with all this she still insists he's a friend. A friend who goes to great lengths it seems to block everyone my wife asks him too. To hide the fact they are "friends".

 

What do i say or do?

 

I confronted my wife about all the lies and she just said "sorry for lying" but we have been seperated now for about 2 weeks and already she's introducing this new man to my 2 year old daughter and it makes me sick.

 

Might also be worth a mention my wife was very quick to change her fb status to single and her name back to her maiden name.

Edited February 11, 2019 by Neko88
Title made clearer

[Marc878]

You realize they are in an affair. Your wife is liying because that's what all cheaters do. She wants the separation to get you out of the way and spend more time with her other man.

 

You should wake up and stop being so naive. If you want proof get a PI. They are expensive but guys like you want to see the proof. You are apparently in total Fenika of what been going on behind your back.

 

If you contact the other mans spouse you may get some better info.

 

If you check your phone bill online you will probably be able to see how long it's been going on.

 

Helping hide their affair, staying in denial and wanting so badly yo believe her is about the worse thing you could do besides leaving your home.

 

Better wake up bud. They are way ahead of you

[Marc878]

You would be better of to tell her him or you and then file if she doesn't come around. I doubt she will because she is neck deep into a sexual affair.

 

At this time talk will get you nothing. I hope you understand. Your actions are all that will count.

 

She's carefully planned the separation to get you conveniently out of the way.

 

Do not make ultimatums that you don't back up. That will only give her more control than she already has.

 

Get to an attorney now!!!!!!

[Mr. Lucky]

What do i say or do?

 

Neko88, this is what separation is - absent the terms of a legal agreement, you make your decisions and she makes hers - ill advised or not.

 

You mitigate this by being the best Dad you can and being there for your daughter. If this is your first disagreement with your STBX, it won't be the last...

 

Mr. Lucky

[PegNosePete]

First, you need to stop playing these stupid social media games. Who cares who blocks who? Leave that kind of stuff for the 12 year olds. Just block the whole bunch of them, and tell your mutual friends you don't care what they do or don't do on social media.

 

Second, you need to stop talking to your wife as though she owes you an explanation. You are separated, and she's with someone else now. You might not approve but it's not your decision or your business. Unless this guy is a danger to your children, you can't stop them "hanging out" or whatever. So you have to stop stalking your wife and trying to catch her in lies. You know she's lying, she knows she's lying, so why do you bother to ask any more? You know she's going to lie so just stop asking.

 

Third, file for divorce. She's made it 100% crystal clear that the marriage is over so there's no reason to delay.

[elaine567]

He and your wife got close and I guess HIS wife told him to block the two of you.

Once they split, he gets back in touch with your wife.

 

Whatever is going on whether they are just close friends moaning about their failed marriages, or are ripping each others clothes off, with respect, it has NOTHING to do with you.

You are separated.

The fact she apparently has moved swiftly on - "single" on FB and has taken her maiden name back, I guess means she is done.

You need to now concentrate on being the best co-parent you can be and forget about sticking your nose into her personal life.

Start preparing for divorce, you are young, you do not want to have this hanging over your head for years.

Bite the bullet, get it over and done with.