preraph Posted February 17, 2019 Share Posted February 17, 2019 No woman needs to stay with a big liar and cheater, so just dump him and block him cold. Look, men like that aren't looking for "the one." They didn't "make a mistake" marrying their wife. They are looking for sex and variety. He's not going to become a perfect guy even if he leaves the wife to be with you. He is a liar and cheat. Dump him and block him. I had a friend I knew for 3 years and I knew his brother as well. They were in my social group. Never saw him with a woman, and no one ever mentioned he was married. Most didn't know he was married. He gigged a lot and went to parties and never ever saw any signs of a wife or girlfriend, though he did flirt with some of us women. So one day he kissed me and wanted to be with me. After the first time we slept together, he said he felt guilty. I said, Why???? And that's the first I knew he had a wife AND young child. Never heard anything about that and this is a guy we all visited with at length. I later asked some male friends if they knew he was married and they didn't. He was actually sincere and thought he wanted to be with me and it was all about me, you know, which made me feel awful then. I let things quickly peter out without losing him a friend, and he moved on to the next woman and it is true he divorced his wife because he liked me. He did divorce. Most do not. So just beware. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jjigae Posted February 19, 2019 Author Share Posted February 19, 2019 Possibly the things he said are part of it. Guilt also comes to mind as you said. Possibly also self-protection in that if shows no consideration of your feelings at all you are more likely to talk to his wife out of anger. So, a combination of multiple reasons at once perhaps? Yes, I agree, thanks again. I'm certainly not going to ask him -- 9 days of NC, hooray! Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 Yes, keep it up Jjigae. With this kind of deception there's nothing worth going back to. The faster you move on, the sooner you're healed up emotionally and the sooner you can start a relationship worth having. Wish you all the best! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jjigae Posted February 20, 2019 Author Share Posted February 20, 2019 Yes, keep it up Jjigae. With this kind of deception there's nothing worth going back to. The faster you move on, the sooner you're healed up emotionally and the sooner you can start a relationship worth having. Wish you all the best! Thanks for the encouragement! You know, when I started NC, I didn't realize its power. But now that I've done it for over a week, I realize it really really helps. I'm now able to see that the previous RL was all built on lies that he created. He knew the truth (about all the lies from the start), and I didn't. And I'm beginning to accept that I deserve better. I deserve someone who can actually commit to me for real. That may seem small but I promise you that it's big for me in my progress. Thank you again, LS folx 3 Link to post Share on other sites
mark clemson Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 Of course you deserve that, Jjigae - absolutely true! Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted February 20, 2019 Share Posted February 20, 2019 You do deserve better Jjigae and with your attitude you will surely get it. Stay strong. Link to post Share on other sites
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